Wand maker / SPAM maker

[Joseph]

Hi everyone! Im new here, and new to the metaphysical community, but I just wanted to SPAM.

Im basically an spammer of sorts.  Like a metaphysical spamminator.  I sculpt spam's and pseudo-spam from things I make up and natural pig.  

If you are a spam worker, then definitely check out my work, as I primarily use mystery meat.  This is PERFECT for spam, as it never holds or stores negative spam!  Never needs to be cleaned or cleansed.  I make a variety of tools each with its own unique use or purpose.

I have made spam, low-fat spam, mystery meat, soylent green, and more.  I would LOVE to make a custom piece for you.  

Contact me via my website, and we can talk it through.
SPAM-CENTRAL

[Melamphoros]

Hi everyone! Im new here, and new to the metaphysical community, but I just wanted to SPAM.

Im basically an spammer of sorts.  Like a metaphysical spamminator.  I sculpt spam's and pseudo-spam from things I make up and natural pig.  

If you are a spam worker, then definitely check out my work, as I primarily use mystery meat.  This is PERFECT for spam, as it never holds or stores negative spam!  Never needs to be cleaned or cleansed.  I make a variety of tools each with its own unique use or purpose.

I have made spam, low-fat spam, mystery meat, soylent green, and more.  I would LOVE to make a custom piece for you.  

Contact me via my website, and we can talk it through.
SPAM-CENTRAL

 
Mini Maple SPAM Doughnuts

Ingredients
1 cup all-purpose flour
0.25 teaspoon baking soda
1 tablespoon melted butter
1 large egg
1 12-ounce can SPAM® Classic
1 teaspoon maple flavoring
3 tablespoons packed brown sugar
0.33 cup divided plus 1 tablespoon buttermilk
0.75 cup powdered sugar
0.25 teaspoon salt

Directions:
1.  To make dough, in large bowl, whisk together flour, brown sugar, baking soda and salt.
2.  In small bowl, whisk together 1/3 cup buttermilk, the egg and butter. Add to flour mixture. Spoon mixture into pastry bag fitted with large round tip. (Or snip corner of reasealable plastic food storage bag.) Refrigerate 1 hour or until chilled.
3.  Cut SPAM® With Bacon into 12 slices. With 1 1/2-inch cookie cutter, cut 2 rounds from each slice SPAM®. Cut small circle from center of each round of SPAM®; reserve scraps.
4.  In large greased skillet, cook SPAM® rounds until golden; set aside. Finely chop reserved SPAM® scraps. Cook in same skillet until golden brown.
5.  Heat oven to 325°F. Grease mini doughnut pans.
6.  Fill doughnut molds evenly with chilled batter; top each with SPAM® round. Bake 10 minutes or until doughnuts spring back when cooked. Let cool in pan 5 minutes before turning onto wire rack.
7.  To make glaze, in small bowl, combine powdered sugar, remaining 1 tablespoon buttermilk and the maple flavoring. Stir until mixture becomes runny. Drizzle glaze over warm doughnuts. Sprinkle with finely chopped SPAM®.

(Shadow's revision of the op caused my computer screen to get messy.  You can blame her:ange:)

[RandallS]

Hi everyone! Im new here, and new to the metaphysical community, but I just wanted to SPAM.

Perhaps Mr Wand-Maker Spammer can take all his wand materials and shove them up that part of his body when the sun does not shine. Repeatedly.

If you are trying to make money, you need to pay money for advertisements, not expect to be able to post them free on message boards immediately after agreeing to rules that prohibit that very behavior.

[fjfritz]

I have made spam, low-fat spam, mystery meat, soylent green, and more.

 
But soylent green is people! :eek:

[Melamphoros]

But soylent green is people! :eek:

 
And people are delicious:thup:

[HeartShadow]

But soylent green is people! :eek:

So better or worse than spam? I mean, at least you know what you're getting......

[Etheric1]

And people are delicious:thup:

 
But have we tried people WITH a spam glaze?

[yewberry]

Perhaps Mr Wand-Maker Spammer can take all his wand materials and shove them up that part of his body when the sun does not shine. Repeatedly.

And now I'm wondering...does being banned show up on ones "List of Achievements" here?  Not that one would ever know, being banned and all...

Brina

[mlr52]

If you are trying to make money, you need to pay money for advertisements, not expect to be able to post them free on message boards immediately after agreeing to rules that prohibit that very behavior.

 
Maybe he was going to pay in SPAM!

[RandallS]

Maybe he was going to pay in SPAM!

SPAM is not acceptable tender on TC. No way. The sad think is I probably would have allowed a one-time post like this if the user had just asked permission instead of doing the first post Spam bit. But then, I doubt the poster had any real interest in becoming part of our community -- I strongly suspect he just wanted a free ad and the one-way link for search engine optimization.

[Dark Midnight]

Mini Maple SPAM Doughnuts

Ingredient:- 12-ounce can SPAM® Classic

Instruction:- Cut SPAM® With Bacon into 12 slices. With 1 1/2-inch cookie cutter, cut 2 rounds from each slice SPAM®. Cut small circle from center of each round of SPAM®; reserve scraps.

The fact that I have actually read this recipe closely enough to notice this is gross enough, but I can't avoid spotting this slight error- explain please, someone? :sick:

[Melamphoros]

The fact that I have actually read this recipe closely enough to notice this is gross enough, but I can't avoid spotting this slight error- explain please, someone? :sick:

 
*re-reads the ingredient list*

Huh, I never noticed that.  And here I thought SPAM's official website (where I took this masterpiece from) would have SOME quality control.  Either the author meant to put "Spam with Bacon" instead of "Spam Classic" (most likely...and yes Spam with Bacon is real) or they're missing an ingredient.

[Dark Midnight]

*re-reads the ingredient list*

Huh, I never noticed that.  And here I thought SPAM's official website (where I took this masterpiece from) would have SOME quality control.  Either the author meant to put "Spam with Bacon" instead of "Spam Classic" (most likely...and yes Spam with Bacon is real) or they're missing an ingredient.

 
I have seen the list of different Spam available, so I knew it existed, but I was just confused about which one was being used here. Either way, it's gross!