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Author Topic: Be careful what you ask for: a story  (Read 1009 times)

Sefiru

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Be careful what you ask for: a story
« on: November 21, 2013, 10:11:48 pm »
There is a key hanging on my door handle. It's a large, old-fashioned copper key. When I first hung it up some months ago, I intended it to be a protective charm (you'll see in a moment why I now think that is hilarious).

I mentioned in my re-intro post that I'm back on TC after leaving a toxic environment. This was my (ex-)dojo, into which I had put a great deal of time and commitment, but over the past little while I'd noticed more and more pressure, bullying and outright emotional abuse on the part of the instructor, to the point where I just had enough. I left. It was hard; I cried a few times the first couple of days. But it was also like a breath of fresh air. I came to TC to see what I'd been missing ...

I came to this very board, and found a bunch of threads discussing my Lord Set and what He is like. And heard this: "Keys are for opening doors, not closing them." Then it occurred to me that the events leading up to my leaving that dojo started to escalate right around the time I hung that key on my door. Cue facepalm and some good-natured cursing.

The lesson: be careful what you ask Him for; He'll give you what you need, not what you want.

The key is staying on my door. Thank you, Neb.y.

Shefyt

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #1 on: November 23, 2013, 05:02:21 pm »
Quote from: Sefiru;130236

The lesson: be careful what you ask Him for; He'll give you what you need, not what you want.


Heh. I think this holds true for most if not all of the Gods. ^_^

-Shefyt
I have not taken time away from the day;
I have done no damage to a beautiful hour.
--Megegi of Thebes

Sefiru

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #2 on: November 24, 2013, 10:03:47 pm »
Quote from: Shefyt;130419
Heh. I think this holds true for most if not all of the Gods. ^_^

-Shefyt


Oh, probably. I don't know how many would rub one's nose in it so thoroughly, though.

Sefiru

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #3 on: November 26, 2013, 08:34:09 pm »
Quote from: Sefiru;130236

Replying to myself so that I can process some stuff "out loud", so to speak.

It's been a strange couple of weeks.

Reading through the boards here, I found the thread on god-slavery, and it gave me the weirdest case of the heebie-jeebies. Like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff and Someone is whispering, "Jump".

Then I wonder if this is just a case of the wannabes.

And on the other hand, I am currently wearing a brand-new ankh pendant, and have worn it every day for the last week ... I hardly ever wear jewelry. Or at least, I didn't used to. I did not expect how nerve-wracking it would be to wear it in public, even though I did not expect, and did not get, any comments.

I find the title "Neb.y" to refer to Himself appealing, but I'm oddly shy about actually using it. The last line of the OP was hard for me to write.

I have a to-do list as long as my arm, mostly art-related (new shrine images all around, finally setting up an ancestor shrine). Good thing I found Symbol and Magic in Egyptian Art at the used-book store the other day.

So, hectic. Yeah.

Looking at what I just wrote, I guess it comes down to, my closet was cozy. But.

...I'm a little scared.
« Last Edit: November 27, 2013, 10:52:46 pm by SunflowerP »

Varian

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #4 on: November 26, 2013, 09:58:16 pm »
Quote from: Sefiru;130826
Replying to myself so that I can process some stuff "out loud", so to speak.

It's been a strange couple of weeks.

Reading through the boards here, I found the thread on god-slavery, and it gave me the weirdest case of the heebie-jeebies. Like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff and Someone is whispering, "Jump".

Then I wonder if this is just a case of the wannabes.

And on the other hand, I am currently wearing a brand-new ankh pendant, and have worn it every day for the last week ... I hardly ever wear jewelry. Or at least, I didn't used to. I did not expect how nerve-wracking it would be to wear it in public, even though I did not expect, and did not get, any comments.

I find the title "Neb.y" to refer to Himself appealing, but I'm oddly shy about actually using it. The last line of the OP was hard for me to write.

I have a to-do list as long as my arm, mostly art-related (new shrine images all around, finally setting up an ancestor shrine). Good thing I found Symbol and Magic in Egyptian Art at the used-book store the other day.

So, hectic. Yeah.

Looking at what I just wrote, I guess it comes down to, my closet was cozy. But.

...I'm a little scared.

 
*sends reassurance*

I'm going through my own share of "here's a cliff, let me shove you towards it." with Anubis.  My experience has collided with my stubbornness, and we're standing there staring at one another, while he points to the slope (that leads to the cliff) and tells me that I've already started and that I consented to starting, knowing what i was getting into, so I may as well go on.  

All I can see is the giant drop at the end.

So no, you're not alone.

Sefiru

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #5 on: November 27, 2013, 06:47:40 pm »
Quote from: Briar Rose;130840

All I can see is the giant drop at the end.

So no, you're not alone.


(((Briar Rose))) Thanks.

Oddly enough, "letting go of stubbornness" is one of the things I need to work on. Like a version of the serenity prayer: knowing when to quit and when to keep going.

Varian

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Re: Be careful what you ask for: a story
« Reply #6 on: November 27, 2013, 08:00:01 pm »
Quote from: Sefiru;130908
(((Briar Rose))) Thanks.

Oddly enough, "letting go of stubbornness" is one of the things I need to work on. Like a version of the serenity prayer: knowing when to quit and when to keep going.

 
You're welcome.

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