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Author Topic: It wasn't even a month . . .  (Read 3812 times)

SatAset

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #15 on: November 05, 2011, 07:49:54 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;28989


Whatever you can spare, we'll take. I'm running on fumes.


(((Starglade, her daughter and family)))

Praying.
I am the Goddess of Who I can Become. I mix the magic of the sorceress with the blade of a warrior. I walk the liminal pathways to see the face of the Goddess, both terrible and kind. As She stares back at me, I tremble in awe and ecstasy.  --SatAset

Starglade

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #16 on: November 05, 2011, 09:40:45 pm »
Quote from: SatAset;29066


 
Update:

When I visited today she was doing pretty well. Bored from braiding bracelets (it's the weekend, not a lot of quality work being done--but more than at the last place, so I'll take it), but in pretty good spirits. They're adding melatonin to her regimen in hopes that it will get her into a deeper sleep more quickly, to try bypassing the REM she's been getting into when she has the nightmares. She told one of the staff this morning that she'd rather dream about being hacked to bits by a psycho killer than dream about her ex again. Harsh.

Of course, being the 14yo she is, she now thinks that "If I can just sleep, I'll be fine." Well . . . no, not fine by a long shot, but if you can get back into a good sleep cycle, the rest of the work you  need to do will be easier to do. Still difficult, but at least not difficult AND being done while sleep-deprived.

This whole first term of school has been a disaster for the most part. She's got decent grades (not the best she could have, but she's solid B's and one C, last I looked), but the rest of her life . . . sucked. The breakup on the first Monday of the first full week of school fucked her over and good. The continuing "I still really like you but I don't want to go out with you/Well okay, we'll go out but not tell anyone/Well, no, we can't go out, this isn't working so let's just be friends/AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH" shit made it all worse. Telling her she had to stay away from him failed miserably; I could keep her from going there at night and on weekends, but they're in the same school, and have two classes together (two hours/day, five days/week). She's missed four or five days (not full days, but leaving after the second hour or at lunch) because of the stress, and for the last week she was vomiting every morning (and no, she's not pregnant--the stress was wearing her down) either at home, at school, or both. (I'm one of those "If you don't have a fever, you're going" moms; I knew it was stress, and for the most part I was right in telling her that if she could make it through the first hour, she'd be all right. Once she got there and got talking with her new friends, more often than not she made it through the day.)

If we hadn't found out last Thursday night that her ex had gotten in trouble and was locked up somewhere (still don't know where--and honestly, it's not our business), she probably wouldn't have spiraled down so quickly and Friday would have been different. Thursday night was really one of the best nights we'd had in the last two months.

::sigh::

Anyway . . . she's safe, she's doing all right, she's on 30-minute watch (up from 15 when she was admitted yesterday), she can go down to the cafeteria for meals instead of eating at the nurse's station. I can sleep tonight.

thanks, everyone.
"The Eightfold Path is sometimes called the pathless path. Each step brings a growing awareness that enlightenment is in the here and now--in the world and in our relationships as we read these words . . . now." -- Jonathan White
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RandallS

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #17 on: November 05, 2011, 10:23:14 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;29078
Anyway . . . she's safe, she's doing all right, she's on 30-minute watch (up from 15 when she was admitted yesterday), she can go down to the cafeteria for meals instead of eating at the nurse's station. I can sleep tonight.

Progress, slight progress, but it's still progress. [[[[Karen]]]]
Randall
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sephira

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #18 on: November 05, 2011, 11:04:13 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;29078

 
I will light a candle and say a mantra and a blessing for Vrinda Devi to help both your family and your daughter through this and for her to get better. (((((Starglade)))))
"If it ain\'t fun, it ain\'t worth doing!"

victoreia

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #19 on: November 06, 2011, 01:44:51 am »
Quote from: Starglade;29078
Update:
::sigh::

Anyway . . . she's safe, she's doing all right, she's on 30-minute watch (up from 15 when she was admitted yesterday), she can go down to the cafeteria for meals instead of eating at the nurse's station. I can sleep tonight.

thanks, everyone.

 
{{{{Starglade, daughter, and family}}}}
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Dark Midnight

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #20 on: November 06, 2011, 03:01:20 am »
Quote from: Starglade;29078
Update:

 
Sending everything I can to help you, your daughter and the rest of your family through this. Please know that I am thinking of you...x {{{Starglade}}}
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SunflowerP

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #21 on: November 06, 2011, 05:01:50 am »
Quote from: Starglade;29078
Update:

 
(((Karen, daughter, & family)))

One thing I keep seeing as you tell this story is that your daughter seems to be fundamentally sensible and self-aware - she knows she's not OK, and she wants to fix it.  That makes a huge difference.

Sunflower
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Catherine

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #22 on: November 06, 2011, 09:44:22 am »
Quote from: Starglade;29078
Update:
Anyway . . . she's safe, she's doing all right, she's on 30-minute watch (up from 15 when she was admitted yesterday), she can go down to the cafeteria for meals instead of eating at the nurse's station. I can sleep tonight.

thanks, everyone.


I'm glad to hear she's doing a little better. You're all in my thoughts.

JuniperMorgan

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #23 on: November 06, 2011, 11:53:24 am »
Quote from: Starglade;28989


 
(((((Starglade, daughter and family )))))  Candle lit - everything I have to spare is yours.
You can also find my ramblings at my blog although I\'m not the best at regular updates.  I\'m working on fixing that. Or look for me on FB here or Google+ here. :)

veggiewolf

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It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #24 on: November 06, 2011, 12:17:37 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;28989
...

(((Karen & Family)))

Prayers going out for your daughter.  Let us know if there's anything you need.
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Starglade

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #25 on: November 06, 2011, 02:11:57 pm »
Quote from: veggiewolf;29143


 
When I spoke with her this morning she sounded almost perky. Apparently the melatonin worked pretty well. She slept, not a dreamless sleep, but the dreams weren't the ones that she dreaded so. Still they were about her ex and herself, but no one else--and "he wasn't angry with me in them." We didn't talk long, as they had just finished Sunday group and were headed to the gym for some activity. I won't see her until sometime tomorrow, either after a meeting with the social worker (not yet scheduled) or during visiting hours tomorrow evening.

Thank you, everyone, for what you're doing. It's all appreciated by everyone here.
"The Eightfold Path is sometimes called the pathless path. Each step brings a growing awareness that enlightenment is in the here and now--in the world and in our relationships as we read these words . . . now." -- Jonathan White
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KittyVel

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #26 on: November 11, 2011, 02:16:43 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;28989
My daughter is back in the psych ward. Different facility, a much more intensive program than before (this is the place we WANTED to put her in last time). In the wee hours of Friday morning she woke from a nightmare about her ex (she's addicted to/obsessed with him) and proceeded to cut her left wrist with a "safety blade" (ha ha ha--NOT) and write on her wall with her blood. NOT the thing a mom wants to find at 6am when going in to get her child up for school.

She spent the first hour or two repeating "I need him to tell me I can sleep" over and over and over. During the intake interview with the nursing staff she said "I might have wanted to kill myself at the start, but when the blood started coming out the voices got quieter so I didn't." This is the first she's mentioned any voices.

I'm scared shitless, people. I know she's in a good place, a safe place--but when she called me to say good morning a little while ago, she started to cry again because she didn't sleep well and had more dreams.

I have no idea how they'll deal with this. I'm just glad we were able to get her into their program. Average stay is 6 days. Part of me hopes she's there longer . . .

Whatever you can spare, we'll take. I'm running on fumes.

 
I'm so sorry to hear this.  I hope things start to look up soon.  *hugs*
<3 Rest in peace, Christiana. I love you so much, and I miss you like crazy already. At least you\'re not hurting anymore...May you ascend. <3

RandallS

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #27 on: November 11, 2011, 05:51:11 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;29164
When I spoke with her this morning she sounded almost perky.

How is she doing?
Randall
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Starglade

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #28 on: November 11, 2011, 06:22:13 pm »
Quote from: RandallS;29818
How is she doing?

 
Not so well. We thought perhaps she was coming home today, but during the family meeting she went to pieces and will be there at least over the weekend. I fear that the ins will stop covering her and we'll have to bring her home, only to be right back where we were before.

It's getting very difficult to have a positive attitude about this, at the moment.

Thank you for asking, though.
"The Eightfold Path is sometimes called the pathless path. Each step brings a growing awareness that enlightenment is in the here and now--in the world and in our relationships as we read these words . . . now." -- Jonathan White
http://grammargeddon.com

KittyVel

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Re: It wasn't even a month . . .
« Reply #29 on: November 11, 2011, 07:12:56 pm »
Quote from: Starglade;29826
Not so well. We thought perhaps she was coming home today, but during the family meeting she went to pieces and will be there at least over the weekend. I fear that the ins will stop covering her and we'll have to bring her home, only to be right back where we were before.

It's getting very difficult to have a positive attitude about this, at the moment.

Thank you for asking, though.

 
I'm sorry to hear that.  *hugs you tight*  I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now.  I wish there was something I could do other than keep the two of you in my thoughts.
<3 Rest in peace, Christiana. I love you so much, and I miss you like crazy already. At least you\'re not hurting anymore...May you ascend. <3

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