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Author Topic: This is probably going to sound stupid, but  (Read 1214 times)

CinnamonBrooms

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This is probably going to sound stupid, but
« on: October 27, 2011, 10:53:30 am »
Samhain is coming & my doors have started opening. This isn't something new, it's been happening my whole life, long before I changed religions. But this year it's starting to get creepy.
(Why is it that if someone had said that to me I would think they were insane? But I have to ask someone)
So this happened the other day:
My dog has a habit of standing in the doorway & watching out the screen door, the other day he was doing his usual thing & then he looks up, wags his tail & the door opens. Jake (the dog) backs up a step, tail still wagging, the door shuts & latches. Jake turns & watches something go threw the kitchen & then turns back to the door & continues watching out it.
They never swing open or slam into the wall like the wind is catching them, they just open & then close again. I tried telling him it was the wind, he isn't buying it.
Now, the screen door was latched before it opened & is facing against the (not blowing) wind. So my husband starts freaking out & saying my mom is visiting me :o I keep trying to tell him that I don't think it's her, this has been happening since long before she died (case in point, it happened in our house growing up) & for whatever reason I really think my mom has been reborn already.
This happens alot & hubby is just not around to see it, but he's completely freaked out by it (which really, we never had anything move & they left (door opened again) a little while later, so what is it hurting?). I don't mind it, how do I get him to calm down?

Also, how do I get who/whatever it is to leave locked doors alone? I don't mind them visiting, but to have my doors open in the middle of the night/when we aren't home is bugging me a bit.

SatSekhem

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Re: This is probably going to sound stupid, but...
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2011, 01:02:35 pm »
Quote from: CinnamonBrooms;27820
Samhain is coming & my doors have started opening. This isn't something new, it's been happening my whole life, long before I changed religions. But this year it's starting to get creepy.
(Why is it that if someone had said that to me I would think they were insane? But I have to ask someone)
So this happened the other day:
My dog has a habit of standing in the doorway & watching out the screen door, the other day he was doing his usual thing & then he looks up, wags his tail & the door opens. Jake (the dog) backs up a step, tail still wagging, the door shuts & latches. Jake turns & watches something go threw the kitchen & then turns back to the door & continues watching out it.
They never swing open or slam into the wall like the wind is catching them, they just open & then close again. I tried telling him it was the wind, he isn't buying it.
Now, the screen door was latched before it opened & is facing against the (not blowing) wind. So my husband starts freaking out & saying my mom is visiting me :o I keep trying to tell him that I don't think it's her, this has been happening since long before she died (case in point, it happened in our house growing up) & for whatever reason I really think my mom has been reborn already.
This happens alot & hubby is just not around to see it, but he's completely freaked out by it (which really, we never had anything move & they left (door opened again) a little while later, so what is it hurting?). I don't mind it, how do I get him to calm down?

Also, how do I get who/whatever it is to leave locked doors alone? I don't mind them visiting, but to have my doors open in the middle of the night/when we aren't home is bugging me a bit.

 
My dad used to ring the doorbell when he wanted to be let in. :) Aside from that, I don't think I'll be of much help.

In calming down your husband, there really isn't a lot that you can do. I don't understand, personally, what has him so upset. Is it the thought of having spirits come to visit or that you don't think it's a spirit of a loved one?
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Valentine

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Re: This is probably going to sound stupid, but...
« Reply #2 on: October 27, 2011, 01:21:38 pm »
Quote from: CinnamonBrooms;27820

Also, how do I get who/whatever it is to leave locked doors alone? I don't mind them visiting, but to have my doors open in the middle of the night/when we aren't home is bugging me a bit.

 
I can't say much about how to calm your husband down--I've met a lot of dead folk, and it's unnerving even for me sometimes, and some live folk are really scared of this stuff.

I do know, re: locked doors, that most dead folk--especially considering how this one sounds--are pretty decent people, and they respond well to politeness.  If you can find a time--maybe next time the door goes, and your "guest" is probably present--to simply, politely say something like, "I know you feel a right to this home, and I respect that, but my family and I live here now and I feel safer when locked doors are respected.  I'm happy to share this space peaceably, but please in the future, I would really appreciate it if you wouldn't unlock our locked doors, especially at night or when we're not home, so that we can feel safe here.  Thank you."  It's often nice to leave a little gift offering out on a regular basis, too, a bit of food or a glass of wine or something, to let dead residents know you appreciate them keeping up their end of the deal.

In general, manners are gold, and "please" and "thank you" and "sir or ma'am" often go a long way.  For a lot of haunts, they really haven't registered that where they are isn't the same as it used to be, and can be confused that there are strangers in their homes or people locking doors they left unlocked, and a gentle reminder that they have to share now, with respect for their own claim to the space, can smooth things out a bit.  
If you do open up communications, and you feel up to it, you might ask if there's anything you can do for them--you might even find that there's something they need that, once they have it, will result in their vacating the premises.
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CinnamonBrooms

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Re: This is probably going to sound stupid, but...
« Reply #3 on: October 27, 2011, 08:22:02 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;27852
My dad used to ring the doorbell when he wanted to be let in. :) Aside from that, I don't think I'll be of much help.

In calming down your husband, there really isn't a lot that you can do. I don't understand, personally, what has him so upset. Is it the thought of having spirits come to visit or that you don't think it's a spirit of a loved one?

 I don't know why he's getting so upset over it, I think it's just because he saw it happen. It's something that's happened all my life & I don't think I've ever really said anything to him beyond a passing 'leave the door opened it'll just open again anyway' or when we hear a noise at the other end of the house he'll ask what it was & I'll just say it was Boo again.
Maybe it would help to tell him I thought it was my mom, I don't believe it & don't like lying, but if it calms him down I guess it would be worth a shot?
 
Quote from: Valentine;27858
I can't say much about how to calm your husband down--I've met a lot of dead folk, and it's unnerving even for me sometimes, and some live folk are really scared of this stuff.

I do know, re: locked doors, that most dead folk--especially considering how this one sounds--are pretty decent people, and they respond well to politeness.  If you can find a time--maybe next time the door goes, and your "guest" is probably present--to simply, politely say something like, "I know you feel a right to this home, and I respect that, but my family and I live here now and I feel safer when locked doors are respected.  I'm happy to share this space peaceably, but please in the future, I would really appreciate it if you wouldn't unlock our locked doors, especially at night or when we're not home, so that we can feel safe here.  Thank you."  It's often nice to leave a little gift offering out on a regular basis, too, a bit of food or a glass of wine or something, to let dead residents know you appreciate them keeping up their end of the deal.

In general, manners are gold, and "please" and "thank you" and "sir or ma'am" often go a long way.  For a lot of haunts, they really haven't registered that where they are isn't the same as it used to be, and can be confused that there are strangers in their homes or people locking doors they left unlocked, and a gentle reminder that they have to share now, with respect for their own claim to the space, can smooth things out a bit.  
If you do open up communications, and you feel up to it, you might ask if there's anything you can do for them--you might even find that there's something they need that, once they have it, will result in their vacating the premises.

I'll try asking next time it happens, right now he's got one of those heavy draft stoppers infront of the door, he's really going to flip if/when it opens anyway.

SatSekhem

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Re: This is probably going to sound stupid, but...
« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2011, 11:32:17 am »
Quote from: CinnamonBrooms;27900
I don't know why he's getting so upset over it, I think it's just because he saw it happen. It's something that's happened all my life & I don't think I've ever really said anything to him beyond a passing 'leave the door opened it'll just open again anyway' or when we hear a noise at the other end of the house he'll ask what it was & I'll just say it was Boo again.
Maybe it would help to tell him I thought it was my mom, I don't believe it & don't like lying, but if it calms him down I guess it would be worth a shot?

 
I don't think lying, in this case, will achieve much. It will only happen again, so you might as well let him freak out about it now. It will only get much worse (for the two of you) if it happens again later.
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