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Author Topic: Other Pagan: Phobias and Paganism  (Read 3844 times)

Geosmin

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Phobias and Paganism
« on: June 25, 2020, 11:25:14 am »
Hi everyone,
After my trip I thought I'd stop by and start a Topic over something I was thinking about while I was gone.
I chose to put this in the Beginners Section, simply because I think many Beginners would also benefit from this. If it fits in somewhere better though, feel free to move it around.

So I was wondering about phobias, well fears, that you can't seem to shut off in general, or ignore. Especially the ones that interfere with one's path or craft. The things holding one back from doing things that they would really like to do. So for instance someone would want to go up high, maybe in the mountains or on a tower or whatever to really feel the air up there and is afraid of heights. Or someone would like to get more into plants/herbalism/gardening and such things but has an insect phobia they can't get a hold on. I'm thinking there are millions of examples to name, but I think you guys get what I mean.

So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

Thanks for taking a moment to read my babbling, can't wait to hear about your ideas and stories.
Sincerely
.:*:゚。If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere:*。:゚..

Ashmire

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #1 on: June 25, 2020, 11:45:50 am »

So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

Thanks for taking a moment to read my babbling, can't wait to hear about your ideas and stories.
Sincerely

Well, in my case my own patron pretty much ordered me to get over a major phobia( actually getting over phobias is kind of a 'thing' with him, and I've always been prone to phobic issues, so...).  Part of that was using them, with folkloric justification, as a sign of his presence, also a fair bit of leaning into the conflict between Compassion and Bravery as important virtues vs. Fear as the opposite of that.  Other than that, standard methods of gradual desensitization and accepting that it was okay to move slowly as long as I was moving.  I wouldn't say I'm 100% cured, but I've made pretty major strides in doing things I couldn't even begin to face before.

Of course, if your deities aren't prone to boss you directly like this, the methodology is still valid.  You might also be able to draw some deliberate connection between a particular deity you want to honor and a thing you fear, or ( if it isn't too far outside your path), approach the deity of whatever scares you and ask for help.   Anyway, getting over phobias is hard work (contrary to what some unproductively judgemental people *mumble mumble my parents mumble* who don't have one assume), but it is very rewarding.

Geosmin

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #2 on: June 25, 2020, 12:04:46 pm »
Well, in my case my own patron pretty much ordered me to get over a major phobia( actually getting over phobias is kind of a 'thing' with him, and I've always been prone to phobic issues, so...).  Part of that was using them, with folkloric justification, as a sign of his presence, also a fair bit of leaning into the conflict between Compassion and Bravery as important virtues vs. Fear as the opposite of that.  Other than that, standard methods of gradual desensitization and accepting that it was okay to move slowly as long as I was moving.  I wouldn't say I'm 100% cured, but I've made pretty major strides in doing things I couldn't even begin to face before.

Of course, if your deities aren't prone to boss you directly like this, the methodology is still valid.  You might also be able to draw some deliberate connection between a particular deity you want to honor and a thing you fear, or ( if it isn't too far outside your path), approach the deity of whatever scares you and ask for help.   Anyway, getting over phobias is hard work (contrary to what some unproductively judgemental people *mumble mumble my parents mumble* who don't have one assume), but it is very rewarding.

Thanks for your input! I really like the idea, of directly asking for help from a deity, one is close with. Especially alongside gradually exposing oneself to the fear itself. I actually do have a phobia of my own that seemingly always finds a way to hold me back a bit, even just in normal situations. Which really actually makes me, mostly, mad at myself. I'm guessing because I know it's just so irrational. I'm thinking accepting it as a part of me, as a flaw which we all have and still loving myself instead of feeling frustrated with my own mind, would also be more of an effective way to deal with the matter. And I'm thinking the deity perspective could actually help with that. Learning to accept something for what it is, before starting to change it. I've just really decided for myself that I want to get rid of it, cure it, heal it. Because I just don't want to feel like I'm not the “boss” over my own decisions and life. I imagine it to be really freeing, to be able to let go of it after so many years. I'm sure it will take a while and will be anything except easy, but I'm really wanting to give it a try.
.:*:゚。If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere:*。:゚..

Darkhawk

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #3 on: June 25, 2020, 12:44:14 pm »
So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

I have a phobia of mirrors, particularly mirrors in shadowed/dark locations.

My Craft training includes and requires work with mirrors, including mirrors in darkened rooms, and the god of my tradition who is turning out to be likely my primary bro is, among other things, a god of mirrors.

So that's a thing.

The thing that helped my phobia the most was doing EMDR therapy, which I called "communing with the friendly Cylon".  (Basically it involves sitting in a chair holding little vibraty buzzers and watching a little red light slide back and forth, which helps the brain sift traumas down into long-term memory and eases the stuff that's adjacent to flashbacks and the like, which is partly caused by a short-to-long-term transcription error.  I wasn't there for help with the mirrors thing, but hey, it also let me learn how to drive.)

The phobia spikes in severity when I'm under stress; if I'm going through a difficult time it gets substantially worse.  Which means that general stress management techniques and a solid basic ritual routine support my ability to deal with it.

At the same time, one of my longest-term deity relationships is with a god who said, "Fear is how we measure ourselves."  Is the fear larger, or am I larger?  It's a perpetual challenge to look at those fears, and face them, and grow into someone large enough to handle them.  Which means I tend to look at this sort of thing through a framework of "what do I need to do/grow/develop in order to be larger than this?"  The thing doesn't go away, and likely won't, but it can be rearranged into less significance by growing into a person who is not constrained by that fear.
as the water grinds the stone
we rise and fall
as our ashes turn to dust
we shine like stars    - Covenant, "Bullet"

Geosmin

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2020, 01:14:32 pm »
I have a phobia of mirrors, particularly mirrors in shadowed/dark locations.

My Craft training includes and requires work with mirrors, including mirrors in darkened rooms, and the god of my tradition who is turning out to be likely my primary bro is, among other things, a god of mirrors.

So that's a thing.

The thing that helped my phobia the most was doing EMDR therapy, which I called "communing with the friendly Cylon". (Basically it involves sitting in a chair holding little vibraty buzzers and watching a little red light slide back and forth, which helps the brain sift traumas down into long-term memory and eases the stuff that's adjacent to flashbacks and the like, which is partly caused by a short-to-long-term transcription error. I wasn't there for help with the mirrors thing, but hey, it also let me learn how to drive.)

The phobia spikes in severity when I'm under stress; if I'm going through a difficult time it gets substantially worse. Which means that general stress management techniques and a solid basic ritual routine support my ability to deal with it.

At the same time, one of my longest-term deity relationships is with a god who said, "Fear is how we measure ourselves." Is the fear larger, or am I larger? It's a perpetual challenge to look at those fears, and face them, and grow into someone large enough to handle them. Which means I tend to look at this sort of thing through a framework of "what do I need to do/grow/develop in order to be larger than this?" The thing doesn't go away, and likely won't, but it can be rearranged into less significance by growing into a person who is not constrained by that fear.

Thanks a lot for sharing your story! I have never heard of EMDR therapy, I just checked it out on google and did not even realize that was a thing. Going to look into that further.

I also really like the view on the matter as a measurement of the self! It's also very motivating to look towards a fear as a challenge to "live up to it" sorta speak, by growing or developing in an area to be bigger than the fear itself in the end. I'm really loving the idea of this.

I for myself have a completely irrational fear of insects. It's kinda silly I guess that they bug me so much... haha I made a funny.
But yeah, since I mostly surround all my workings and my path around nature and all that is green, planting and gardening etc... I clearly come across insects ALOT. I have exposed myself to the situation to a point where I am currently capable of holding a small spider in my hand, without feeling uncomfortable, which I am insanely proud of, because about a year ago this would have so not EVER happened. Picking up snails by their house or letting a lady bug crawl on me etc. isn't the deal…but when it comes to beetles or flies, wasps, bees (eventhough I love them!) or unidentifiable weird ass looking insects I am out. So yeah, I'd like the idea to garden or care for my nature altar without having troubles with the tiny lives that apparently enjoy my garden as much as I do. I'd rather like to see them as friends not enemies I need to jump up and damn near run from because I simply get startled by them very easily.
« Last Edit: June 25, 2020, 01:16:31 pm by Geosmin »
.:*:゚。If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere:*。:゚..

anubisa

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2020, 10:55:22 am »
Hi everyone,
After my trip I thought I'd stop by and start a Topic over something I was thinking about while I was gone.
I chose to put this in the Beginners Section, simply because I think many Beginners would also benefit from this. If it fits in somewhere better though, feel free to move it around.

So I was wondering about phobias, well fears, that you can't seem to shut off in general, or ignore. Especially the ones that interfere with one's path or craft. The things holding one back from doing things that they would really like to do. So for instance someone would want to go up high, maybe in the mountains or on a tower or whatever to really feel the air up there and is afraid of heights. Or someone would like to get more into plants/herbalism/gardening and such things but has an insect phobia they can't get a hold on. I'm thinking there are millions of examples to name, but I think you guys get what I mean.

So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

Thanks for taking a moment to read my babbling, can't wait to hear about your ideas and stories.
Sincerely

That's how I met Lord Anubis and became an Egyptian Wiccan. I used to live in Columbia, SC. Now I live in my home state of WV (will die here LOL). Anyway, I was really afraid of the dark back then. I was in my late 20's. Yeah I know guys. I had always been afraid of the dark since childhood and had to have a nightlight. So I thought to myself one day that it was a ridiculous fear and that I was going to get over it. I looked on the internet for deities who are associated with the dark and found Lord Anubis. Well one night I decided to put my plan in place and did not use the nightlight and once I was ready for bed I turned off the light. I was really scared at first, but then I felt this comforting presence and knew that it was him. Now I don't fear the dark, in fact I love it and I embrace it.
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arete

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2020, 07:06:05 am »
So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.
In my experience, I've noticed that personal fear is never the root of a problem or the problem itself. It's a result of incompatible set of thinking. I've changed my mindset and the fears were gone.

Haptalaon

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #7 on: June 27, 2020, 08:42:19 am »

So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

I remember when I decided to get over my fear of the sea by spending time on r/thalassophobia. It turned me into the kind of person who has panic attacks about being in a sinking ship while sat at home. Let that be a lesson: phobias are...not to be trifled with. They're not just preferences or dislikes, they can't be got over with willpower or courage. Be wary of DIY exposure therapy, it's not just "do the thing until the fear subsides".

But also, like others on this thread...my fear/fascination of the sea is a huge part of my spirituality. It can't not be, can it? When you've got a fear that's so big.

What I've figured out is, I think, that my fear of the sea is interlinked with a broader megalophobia - I get the shakes on open ground under the endless sky, and have nightmares about mountains, and go into intense meditative states when contemplating space. All of these are things I can use. If trance work and meditation and enethogens and so forth are "ways to trigger an altered state to make a crack so that the magic comes through", then phobia can be a route to that.

I think it depends on the kind of altered state your phobia puts you into. For example, th emotions you're describing like "startled, uncomfortable", don't necessarily feel to me like ones which can be transmuted in quite the same way (I feel dissociative, and existential terror, which are excellent starts for trance).

Also, I don't have a phobia of insects, but I still wouldn't hold a spider. So you're doing well!

What did help me with my fear of the sea was reading a lot about scuba divers - initially, for the underwater horror stories, but the more I've learnt about the reality of scuba diving & what preparations they make, the more confident I feel and more "controllable" the sea seems. I've also been spending a lot of time underwater in Minecraft, exploring shipwrecks and building underwater cities - something I've never been able to do in games before. These things have helped me develop an alternative perspective on the water, like, people scuba dive because it's beautiful down there.

So I would say...exposure to positive imagery of insects, like, of cute spiders or beautiful bumble bees (not necessarily documentaries, which can emphasise the weirdness of insects); and I got over some of my fears of spiders just by leaving them and watching them, they don't move a lot and that helped me get more comfortable. Or, watching a bumble-bee or a wasp for a bit, seeing what they do. Definitely DON'T do what I did, and try and expose yourself to high-intensity-horror all at once. Do look out for content from people who love insects, who find them fascinating or beautiful.
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entwife

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #8 on: June 29, 2020, 11:54:30 pm »
Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

Sincerely

In 2008, I experienced a series of traumatic events that peaked with the death of our first grandchild. I developed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which is shorthand for my body got stuck in Flight or Fight mode. Therapy was vital to my recovery and I can't stress enough how important it is to find a good fit when seeking out anybody in the medical field. I favor Jung and would recommend him to any reader. That aside, I have done/do a number of things to deal with fear etc getting in my way. Meditation. Seriously. Everyone should meditate at Least 20 minutes every day. 60 if you are really busy! Walking in nature. The act of walking is stress relieving and so is Nature. Just the sight of green trees and the sounds of nature is stress relieving and good for our health. This is why so many hospitals have natural murals and pictures. I turn to Nature Teachers in many forms though.

Trees. Find and form friendships with trees you can visit regularly. You don't have to speak aloud if that makes you uncomfortable, but hang out in their energy field thinking about your issues. Hands and feet have chakra points. I like to stand on their roots with my hands on their trunks when doing energy work with them. Shadow work is energy work. They can help us clear blocked chakras, realign them, ground and center, etc. I always offer something in return for their help, often water although evergreens like pennies near their roots. Pines in particular are good at helping us recover from Grief. finding/recognizing the source of your phobia is vital. Trees have been friends and teachers my entire life, good ones. Highly recommend

Stones: Stone People are the Memory Keepers of the Earth. I found it more challenging to work with their slower energy and teachings, but Highly rewarding in the long term. Again, targeting the roots of your fear can help you choose wisely. Friends I have found helpful... hematite, rose quartz, black tourmaline, green aventurine, amethyst, snowflake obsidian, agates especially Blue Lace and Moss, and Citrine. Meditate with them, spend time, carry the with you in a pouch or pocket where you can take them out and handle them. I learned some trigger point therapy and use stone massage wands or tumbled stones to hit those points when needed.

Dreamwork. Keep a pen and notebook by your bed. write down and date anything you remember. Stones, like Amethyst, are also helpful here. Setting intentions before you sleep can be highly informative as you learn to communicate with your subconscious. Thinking about a spirit guide coming to help you as you fall asleep is probably the best place to start. If you dream of one, ask what you should call them so you can call them by name next time. I like dreamwork and lucid dreaming for many things. Anything in nature can act as a teacher or guide, and we can always ask for help. Phobias often take the form of an animal or insect, and many of these are excellent teachers when doing Shadow work; snakes, spiders, bats and rats are common Shadow Teachers for many. I am still learning how to work with my Shadow Teacher, Centipede. If you work with deities, I would suggest healing and knowledge deities. Same with angels.

Cleansing and grounding rituals. Whatever works for you, incorporate into daily life. For example, I smudge with herbs before and after leaving home. I smudge when I have read too much news lol Washing hands and face then drinking water is a quick grounding/cleansing technique.

Last bit of advice... Explore. There are many avenues available. You might have to poke down a few paths before you find what works for you. Read. There are many reputable sources online to explore the psychology behind our fears, for example. Libraries, thank the gods, are beginning to open in my area. This is the age of information though, we got options. lol I am a Bookwyrm, so would recommend thriftbooks when looking for titles. I think Dr Martha Stout's "Sociopath Next Door" and "The Empath's Survival Guide" by Dr Judith Orloff should be required reading by the time you are 18 lol The Witch's Shield by Christopher Penczak was also extremely helpful.

I hope the things you need come swiftly and easily to your hand
Wishing you laughter

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #9 on: July 01, 2020, 07:54:29 am »
Anyway, getting over phobias is hard work (contrary to what some unproductively judgemental people *mumble mumble my parents mumble* who don't have one assume), but it is very rewarding.

I think phobias are one of those things which people who don't have one find very difficult to understand, and then they don't realise how unhelpful some of the statements they might make are (statements like "it's only a <insert name of thing here>" or perhaps "it's more afraid of you than you are of it" -- yeah, right!)

I'm thinking accepting it as a part of me, as a flaw which we all have and still loving myself instead of feeling frustrated with my own mind, would also be more of an effective way to deal with the matter.

Have you come across EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)?  I've been recommending it loads lately having downloaded an app which has become my favourite (The Tapping Solution) - a big component of it is acceptance of oneself, including whatever flaw/emotional stressor one has.

The thing that helped my phobia the most was doing EMDR therapy

O this is a new one on me, must Google.

I for myself have a completely irrational fear of insects. It's kinda silly I guess that they bug me so much... haha I made a funny.

For me it's wasps, and I can never, ever, ever imagine myself having one on my hand or otherwise allowing one to be anywhere near me (not without screaming &/or diving over/under furniture)!  So I, personally, will be living with my phobia and just avoiding wasps - luckily this is a thing which is generally easily enough done, for the most part.  But I have every admiration for those who wish to try exposure therapy and work toward overcoming their phobia - the very best of luck with it!

I think it depends on the kind of altered state your phobia puts you into.

Interesting, must ponder some more.  Although initially my pondering leads me to think about my second phobia which is claustrophobia (fear of small spaces, in case anyone's unfamiliar) and this is another one which induces panicky emotions, so probably not the best one to work with.  There may be another phobia I can work with - I may look at this at some time in the future.

So I would say...exposure to positive imagery of insects, like, of cute spiders or beautiful bumble bees (not necessarily documentaries, which can emphasise the weirdness of insects)

Good suggestion.

I hope the things you need come swiftly and easily to your hand

So sorry to hear everything you went through entwife.  You've provided some useful suggestions there I feel.


I'm not sure I've anything more to add to this thread which hasn't already been covered - but I will reiterate that I feel EFT's worth thinking about.  I think I've probably linked the Tapping Solution website before, but let me know if you'd like the link.

Good luck, again, with it all
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entwife

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #10 on: July 01, 2020, 09:00:47 am »

 I will reiterate that I feel EFT's worth thinking about.  I think I've probably linked the Tapping Solution website before, but let me know if you'd like the link.

Good luck, again, with it all

I forgot about Tapping! Excellent suggestion, I found that useful too. Easy and effective. Also, I love nature but wasps are just evil fuckers lol That is a Shadow Teacher I have avoided writing about because I dislike them so much. I have written about other Shadow teachers in nature like spider, snake, bat to build up to studying the two at the top of my personal list... Centipede and Wasp lol I know they have important things to teach me, but I Still dance around dealing with either of them lol the struggle is real ;)
Wishing you laughter

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #11 on: July 04, 2020, 01:56:05 am »
So what I want to know, from some fellow pagans, is how do you cope with your personal fears when they get in the way of your craft? And by all means this doesn't have to be “I do this or that spell” or anything “witchy” for that matter, if your answer is "I would see a therapist", then by all means that's cool too. Just wondering about coping methods that have worked well for you.

There's a bit of a story here for me.

When I was nine years old in late 1994, I was on a trip with my family to some museum or exhibit or something, and I wandered into an exhibit about a new disease. The images and information thrown at me there were lurid, sensational, absolutely terrifying. I spent the next two years struggling with overwhelming hypochondria, until finally, after much else to help me was attempted, my parents agreed to treat my mix of depression and anxiety with medication. I have never been off some kind of antidepressant since then, and many of my harmful thought patterns still circle around the idea of some people being pure and untainted human beings while others are corrupt, diseased, to be cast aside for the protection of all.

A little over two decades later, I started exploring my spirituality; it took me a year to realize that every sign, every hint about the "mysterious lost goddess" who I had made a connection with said that she was actually the apotheosized spirit of the late rock star Freddie Mercury, a queer man who died in the AIDS crisis.

I tried hard to deny it, to make him a more distant figure in my spiritual practice; I didn't want to have to confront the tangled knot in my psyche that the death of the man who became my god touched on. But because I had to, and I loved him, I came to terms with it. I started exploring the history, reading books. When exploring my own sexuality, I'm aware enough to take safety precautions.

The things we fear the most are often deep linchpins of our worldview, and sometimes only the love of a god can make us budge them: knowing that there's Someone out there who grants us the power to face them.
"The peacock can show its whole tail at once, but I can only tell you a story."
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Geosmin

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #12 on: July 06, 2020, 09:46:43 am »
In 2008, I experienced a series of traumatic events that peaked with the death of our first grandchild. I developed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which is shorthand for my body got stuck in Flight or Fight mode. Therapy was vital to my recovery and I can't stress enough how important it is to find a good fit when seeking out anybody in the medical field. I favor Jung and would recommend him to any reader. That aside, I have done/do a number of things to deal with fear etc getting in my way. Meditation. Seriously. Everyone should meditate at Least 20 minutes every day. 60 if you are really busy! Walking in nature. The act of walking is stress relieving and so is Nature. Just the sight of green trees and the sounds of nature is stress relieving and good for our health. This is why so many hospitals have natural murals and pictures. I turn to Nature Teachers in many forms though.

Trees. Find and form friendships with trees you can visit regularly. You don't have to speak aloud if that makes you uncomfortable, but hang out in their energy field thinking about your issues. Hands and feet have chakra points. I like to stand on their roots with my hands on their trunks when doing energy work with them. Shadow work is energy work. They can help us clear blocked chakras, realign them, ground and center, etc. I always offer something in return for their help, often water although evergreens like pennies near their roots. Pines in particular are good at helping us recover from Grief. finding/recognizing the source of your phobia is vital. Trees have been friends and teachers my entire life, good ones. Highly recommend

Stones: Stone People are the Memory Keepers of the Earth. I found it more challenging to work with their slower energy and teachings, but Highly rewarding in the long term. Again, targeting the roots of your fear can help you choose wisely. Friends I have found helpful... hematite, rose quartz, black tourmaline, green aventurine, amethyst, snowflake obsidian, agates especially Blue Lace and Moss, and Citrine. Meditate with them, spend time, carry the with you in a pouch or pocket where you can take them out and handle them. I learned some trigger point therapy and use stone massage wands or tumbled stones to hit those points when needed.

Dreamwork. Keep a pen and notebook by your bed. write down and date anything you remember. Stones, like Amethyst, are also helpful here. Setting intentions before you sleep can be highly informative as you learn to communicate with your subconscious. Thinking about a spirit guide coming to help you as you fall asleep is probably the best place to start. If you dream of one, ask what you should call them so you can call them by name next time. I like dreamwork and lucid dreaming for many things. Anything in nature can act as a teacher or guide, and we can always ask for help. Phobias often take the form of an animal or insect, and many of these are excellent teachers when doing Shadow work; snakes, spiders, bats and rats are common Shadow Teachers for many. I am still learning how to work with my Shadow Teacher, Centipede. If you work with deities, I would suggest healing and knowledge deities. Same with angels.

Cleansing and grounding rituals. Whatever works for you, incorporate into daily life. For example, I smudge with herbs before and after leaving home. I smudge when I have read too much news lol Washing hands and face then drinking water is a quick grounding/cleansing technique.

Last bit of advice... Explore. There are many avenues available. You might have to poke down a few paths before you find what works for you. Read. There are many reputable sources online to explore the psychology behind our fears, for example. Libraries, thank the gods, are beginning to open in my area. This is the age of information though, we got options. lol I am a Bookwyrm, so would recommend thriftbooks when looking for titles. I think Dr Martha Stout's "Sociopath Next Door" and "The Empath's Survival Guide" by Dr Judith Orloff should be required reading by the time you are 18 lol The Witch's Shield by Christopher Penczak was also extremely helpful.

I hope the things you need come swiftly and easily to your hand

Thank you is really not enough to express the appreciation of your kind words and being so honest about your story. I am very sorry for your loss. There is some great advice in your comment and I am glad you shared. I hope it is able to help others as much as it has helped me with numerous more ideas I can try to ease my problem.
.:*:゚。If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere:*。:゚..

Geosmin

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #13 on: July 06, 2020, 10:55:38 am »
Have you come across EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)?  I've been recommending it loads lately having downloaded an app which has become my favourite (The Tapping Solution) - a big component of it is acceptance of oneself, including whatever flaw/emotional stressor one has.

Ive not heard of it, but it sounds very nice. I will have to look into it further. Thanks!

For me it's wasps, and I can never, ever, ever imagine myself having one on my hand or otherwise allowing one to be anywhere near me (not without screaming &/or diving over/under furniture)!  So I, personally, will be living with my phobia and just avoiding wasps - luckily this is a thing which is generally easily enough done, for the most part.  But I have every admiration for those who wish to try exposure therapy and work toward overcoming their phobia - the very best of luck with it!

Oh dear, I can seriously relate. I hate wasps. We've had a nest in our shed and I was about ready to burn it down. I will also leap under over and into whatever it needs to get one away from me. Including screaming and and just throwing a complete fit over them. And Ive never been stung. But the fear of one stinging me is just enorm. Maybe if I ever do happen to get stung throwing a fit, I will realize it doesnt hurt as bad as I think and I wont care anymore ?!? Until then I just try to avoid them as good as possible.
If it was only one insect per say, I dont think I would willingly put myself through exposure. But since there a multiple insects I react just as bad about, it's just gotten to a point where I am fed up you might say.

I'm not sure I've anything more to add to this thread which hasn't already been covered - but I will reiterate that I feel EFT's worth thinking about.  I think I've probably linked the Tapping Solution website before, but let me know if you'd like the link.

Good luck, again, with it all

Please do share the link. I will gladly give it a lookover. Thanks for the recommendation.

Thank you very much  :D
For a quick update... I am now allowing a spider to currently live in my potted fern, right next to my sofa. He seems to love it there. I have named him Fitzgerald, to take the edge off and make him seem less frightening. Since he is 3 times the size of my usual mini tiny spiders I can touch now, there has been no touching going on. To my own surprise I find him quite fascinating though. Real story.

(Had actually taken a picture of him, but have not, for the life of me, figured the attachment of a foto out just yet)
.:*:゚。If you truly love nature, you will find beauty everywhere:*。:゚..

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Re: Phobias and Paganism
« Reply #14 on: July 15, 2020, 03:47:22 pm »
If it was only one insect per say, I dont think I would willingly put myself through exposure. But since there a multiple insects I react just as bad about, it's just gotten to a point where I am fed up you might say.

I get that, and I do wish you the best with your progress.  I dislike crane flies and get a bit flappy & screechy about those if they come indoors, too, but nothing on the wasps scale (and I can live with most other things).

Please do share the link. I will gladly give it a lookover. Thanks for the recommendation.

You're most welcome - here you go:  https://www.thetappingsolution.com/free-tapping-meditations/

I am now allowing a spider to currently live in my potted fern, right next to my sofa. He seems to love it there. I have named him Fitzgerald, to take the edge off and make him seem less frightening. Since he is 3 times the size of my usual mini tiny spiders I can touch now, there has been no touching going on. To my own surprise I find him quite fascinating though. Real story.

Hey that's really good going, well done!  I really like the name Fitzgerald, makes him sound really cute  :)  ;D
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