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Author Topic: Need some help finding my deities  (Read 2532 times)

Zanze

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Need some help finding my deities
« on: April 21, 2013, 07:59:07 am »
It seems lately I've been going round in circles. I seem to find a god or group of gods from a particular pantheon that I like and then they say "No".

Prior to venturing into Paganism, I was raised Catholic but had little interest in Christianity of any kind. I had looked into Baha'i faith and also studied Pure Land Buddhism. I got so into Pure Land Buddhism that I even contemplated converting to the sect. However I fell out of love with both of the religions over time.

After finding Paganism, I decided to start looking into finding some deities to honor. So, I began with my ancestry, which is Anglo-Saxon and Irish. Looking into the Germanic and Irish gods and goddesses in general, I thought I was onto a winner however I got this feeling from both individual gods and both pantheons "Thanks for the interest but were not the ones for you." It was disappointing but none the less I continued my search.

I had always loved Greek culture so I decided to approach the Greek gods next, after a bit of prayer and also some research, I seemed to get the same answer only a lot more emphatic "We are not for you." Went to the Roman deities, same thing, "No."

Then I tried the Egyptian deities, I had always had a fascination with Anubis as a child and I thought it might be worth looking into. I did a lot of research, even found some gods I thought I might like (Anubis was among them) I thought I might be finally on track, however something told me it wasn't right for me, I just felt it in my gut. Then all of a sudden it was as if my interest in them passed within a day or two.
Out of a bit of frustration, I poured a libation to my ancestors to ask them to help me point me into the right direction. I kept my eyes open for the next few days and weeks, but I didn't notice anything popping out at me.  

So, I took a break for a few months, didn't touch any books, look at any websites or pray or give offerings to any deities. I got on with my life. Then one day, out of the blue I decided to pick up where I left off. I decided to look into the Gallic gods, after a lot of research, prayer and offerings, once again "No, You're not one of ours but thanks for the interest." Slavic gods, same response.

I then decided to think outside the box and try the Taoist deities, in particular the Three Pure Ones, I felt captivated by their images for some strange reason. Did a lot of research on Taoism and decided to prayed to them however the message I got was, "Sorry son, we are not right for you."

Then I tried the Hindu/Vedic culture. I read tons of books on Hinduism, their practices and the gods. I prayed, recited mantras and gave offerings to some of the gods I thought I was connected to, but I was met with a "Thanks but we are not the right ones for you" message.

Then I tried Aztec deities, however no sooner had I began to research it, I got an emphatic "No". Sumerian deities "No", Canaanite deities "Hahaha...No".

I'm at my wits end here, I have no idea what the hell to do next. I feel as if Paganism is definatley my path but I don't know which gods are the ones I'm mean to follow. It always seems that as soon as I start to think that I've found gods whom I am comfortable with, I get the answer "No."

Does anybody know what I could try and do to help me find the right god and/or gods for me? Any suggestions at all would be much appreciated.

Catherine

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2013, 11:02:37 am »
Quote from: Zanze;106260


Prior to venturing into Paganism, I was raised Catholic but had little interest in Christianity of any kind.

*snip*

Does anybody know what I could try and do to help me find the right god and/or gods for me? Any suggestions at all would be much appreciated.


Hi Zanze,
This is just wild guess, shot in the dark kind of idea, but maybe it will help.

You said you were raised Catholic. Did you go through the confirmation ceremony? If so, maybe you have to find a way to break that bond first.

I thought of this because my nephew made his confirmation yesterday. At 15, I'm not sure that he's mature enough to choose a religion and dedicate himself to that for his whole life. I've been thinking that it might cause problems later on. It's hard to break up with a god, you know?

Anyway, just wanted to toss that idea out there...

savveir

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2013, 11:38:58 am »
Quote from: Zanze;106260
It seems lately I've been going round in circles. I seem to find a god or group of gods from a particular pantheon that I like and then they say "No".


 
Do you need a deity to begin with? You could try to find a path that suits you as a person and work on that first. Try to find something that values the same things you value etc.
"I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."
-Lewis Carroll

crazyharry

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2013, 04:40:29 pm »
Quote from: Zanze;106260

Does anybody know what I could try and do to help me find the right god and/or gods for me? Any suggestions at all would be much appreciated.

 
I agree with savvy on this, but I think it's definitely worth looking into some of Catherine's ideas as well. Changing religions is complicated.

I guess I just think you're a little too worried about finding a deity. It might be good to just get out and interact with the world on your own terms for a little while, and see where you end up.

Zanze

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2013, 08:43:37 pm »
Quote from: Catherine;106266
Hi Zanze,
You said you were raised Catholic. Did you go through the confirmation ceremony? If so, maybe you have to find a way to break that bond first.


No, I never underwent a Confirmation ceremony. I was baptized however.

SunflowerP

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #5 on: April 22, 2013, 12:00:13 am »
Quote from: Zanze;106260
Does anybody know what I could try and do to help me find the right god and/or gods for me? Any suggestions at all would be much appreciated.

 
As Savvy mentioned, it may be that what suits you isn't a deity-centred path at all.

Or as another possibility, perhaps thinking less about pantheons and more about individual deities would help. You did mention doing some of this, but your post seems to put a much stronger emphasis on pantheons - I know a lot of the advice available implies, or even says outright, that you must choose one pantheon and stick to it, but that's not necessarily true; while many people are indeed called to practice a one-pantheon path, some people aren't.  (That idea began as an attempt to prevent ultra-superficial plug'n'play approaches - but the sort of people who take that sort of approach are perfectly capable of being no less superficial even within a single pantheon, so it didn't really work.  But people keep on passing that advice around without knowing how it began, simply because it's what they were told when starting out.)

That advice is also given, much more sensibly, to help keep people from being overwhelmed by trying to Study! All! The! Deities! at once.  But that end is equally, if not better, served, by choosing just a few individual deities that you find really interesting, and studying them further.

There's probably not a lot of point in revisiting any deity who has told you, 'No, you're not one of mine,' on that individual level.  But don't rule out deities from pantheons where you've got the 'nope, not ours,' response; it may be that that answer was about pantheon-as-a-whole rather than about any individual deities in it.

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Zanze

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #6 on: April 22, 2013, 05:08:40 am »
Quote from: SunflowerP;106334
Or as another possibility, perhaps thinking less about pantheons and more about individual deities would help. You did mention doing some of this, but your post seems to put a much stronger emphasis on pantheons - I know a lot of the advice available implies, or even says outright, that you must choose one pantheon and stick to it, but that's not necessarily true; while many people are indeed called to practice a one-pantheon path, some people aren't.


I have kind of done both at the same time. I've always known that actually finding a complete pantheon to honor would be hard for me, so I mostly looked at individual gods and goddesses. The ones I always seemed to be drawn to, I would research and pray to for maybe a week or so before I would get hints from them that I wasn't one of theirs.

Geroth

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #7 on: April 22, 2013, 05:34:47 am »
Quote from: Zanze;106260
It seems lately I've been going round in circles. I seem to find a god or group of gods from a particular pantheon that I like and then they say "No".


I was in your position less than a year ago. I did tons of research, prayer and a few rituals here and there but could never seem to connect to any deity. I felt as if I should give up. However, after a while I began to see small signs from the deities. If you are thinking too much you will often miss something wonderful and enlightening.

When searching for deities, The thing I found important is, you have to have an open mind. The gods who make contact with you, may not be the ones you initially hoped for and they can be surprising sometimes. Take me for example, I had always thought about European deities and nothing else. However, when I took a step back and not clustered with research, Kwan Yin showed up unexpectedly, I was seeing signs everywhere, then after having a good think about it for a little while I realized she was giving me signs the whole time, I was just too close minded to realize it and I felt like a complete fool afterwards. Don't expect an obvious sign, they are often subtle hints and you do have to pay a lot of attention, but if a deity really wants to make contact with you, they will.

There are also other pantheons you could look at also that you did not mention, the Finnish, Lithuanian, Scottish, Welsh even the Japanese Shinto gods, After all, never in a million years would I have ever guessed Kwan Yin would come calling.

Maybe you should go back to the beginning, where you started, take it slow and steady. To me it seems like you rushed it a little too fast, just like I did. Read myths, search the net, keep praying and making offerings to deities you like. But take it slow. You're more likely to pick up hints and signs that way.

Zanze

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Re: Need some help finding my deities
« Reply #8 on: April 23, 2013, 01:41:08 am »
Quote from: Geroth;106348
I was in your position less than a year ago. I did tons of research, prayer and a few rituals here and there but could never seem to connect to any deity. I felt as if I should give up. However, after a while I began to see small signs from the deities. If you are thinking too much you will often miss something wonderful and enlightening.

When searching for deities, The thing I found important is, you have to have an open mind. The gods who make contact with you, may not be the ones you initially hoped for and they can be surprising sometimes. Take me for example, I had always thought about European deities and nothing else. However, when I took a step back and not clustered with research, Kwan Yin showed up unexpectedly, I was seeing signs everywhere, then after having a good think about it for a little while I realized she was giving me signs the whole time, I was just too close minded to realize it and I felt like a complete fool afterwards. Don't expect an obvious sign, they are often subtle hints and you do have to pay a lot of attention, but if a deity really wants to make contact with you, they will.

There are also other pantheons you could look at also that you did not mention, the Finnish, Lithuanian, Scottish, Welsh even the Japanese Shinto gods, After all, never in a million years would I have ever guessed Kwan Yin would come calling.

Maybe you should go back to the beginning, where you started, take it slow and steady. To me it seems like you rushed it a little too fast, just like I did. Read myths, search the net, keep praying and making offerings to deities you like. But take it slow. You're more likely to pick up hints and signs that way.


Thanks for the reply. I personally don't think I rushed into it too much I gotta say, I should have mentioned the research I did was over the course of almost two years, so I've been doing this for a while now.

As for having an open mind, I totally agree and I've been doing that. I've never really had preconceptions of what kind of deity(s) actually call me. I've been pretty much open to anything (barring that they are not evil).

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