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Author Topic: I could really use some insight  (Read 1643 times)

KcarieLynn

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I could really use some insight
« on: May 30, 2012, 01:21:00 am »
I am VERY new to paganism. I was raised in a variety of Christian beliefs but never felt truly connected in that faith.  For the last couple of years I have considered myself agnostic.  I would always say "No one knows what is out there, and no one is supposed to know what is out there."  I was mostly content.

About a week ago, a friend told me about his beliefs in paganism.  I was curious, so I did a lot of research on Pagan Pride, read articles, forums, etc.  I have been mulling and reflecting on that information for a couple days.  I have been feeling drawn to Hellenic Reconstructionism.

I am currently living in west Connecticut and it stormed.  After the worst of it had passed, I decided to go for a walk in the rain.  I'm not sure why, it was dark and in hindsight was a bad idea, but I felt pulled to do so.  I found sort of park at the center of town and sat on a bench there for almost an hour.  I felt so aware of everything around me, I meditated, and I felt like I was connected to something around me.  I don't know how to describe it.

Am I connecting dots where dots shouldn't be connected?  Feeling things where there is nothing to be felt?  I just don't know how to interpret these things.  If you have a story or experience I would love to hear it.  Advice is appreciated.  I just don't know where to go from here.

Thank you!
Kcarie Lynn

PlaceboArtist

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #1 on: May 30, 2012, 03:09:20 am »
Quote from: KcarieLynn;57510

I am currently living in west Connecticut and it stormed.  After the worst of it had passed, I decided to go for a walk in the rain.  I'm not sure why, it was dark and in hindsight was a bad idea, but I felt pulled to do so.  I found sort of park at the center of town and sat on a bench there for almost an hour.  I felt so aware of everything around me, I meditated, and I felt like I was connected to something around me.  I don't know how to describe it.

Am I connecting dots where dots shouldn't be connected?  Feeling things where there is nothing to be felt?  I just don't know how to interpret these things.  If you have a story or experience I would love to hear it.  Advice is appreciated.  I just don't know where to go from here.

Thank you!
Kcarie Lynn


The human brain is hard-wired to notice patterns, or 'connect dots'. So I wouldn't say they shouldn't be connected - it's up to you to figure out if you believe it's a deity, or something else, or just the fact that nature is beautiful. The feeling you described is one I experience, it eventually led me to the label Pantheist - which means the whole of nature is my only god.

I'm not at all surprised that you started noticing that feeling/connection immediately after you explored Paganism. After all, as an agnostic you don't really expect to feel something like that, which can feel quite supernatural. But if you've just discovered a group of religions that have reverence for nature, you'll be more likely to pick up on your connection to nature just because it's at the front of your mind.

If you feel called to the Hellenic gods and goddesses, read up on some of the myths. See if anything in particular calls to you. Try leaving offerings for a god and see if you get a response.

The best advice I can give you is to try different things and then make sense of the evidence.

TisiphoneSeraph

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2012, 01:24:03 am »
Quote from: KcarieLynn;57510
Am I connecting dots where dots shouldn't be connected?  Feeling things where there is nothing to be felt?  I just don't know how to interpret these things.  If you have a story or experience I would love to hear it.  Advice is appreciated.  I just don't know where to go from here.

Thank you!
Kcarie Lynn

Are the dots you're connecting meaningful to you?

I know some people like to draw clear lines of what is and isn't deity and they try to make out which experiences are definite proof of a deity interacting with them or definitely not. Which is useful for some people but it never has been for me.

Quiet moments like that have often been the times I felt closest to my deities, time I've known they were there and present with me.

I don't tend to get traditional signs like birds acting strange or weather answering prayers, I get those moments when the world pauses and my deities pause with me.
« Last Edit: May 31, 2012, 01:24:55 am by TisiphoneSeraph »
divination thoughts over at hillbilly oracle

Fier

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2012, 09:36:28 am »
Quote from: KcarieLynn;57510

I have been feeling drawn to Hellenic Reconstructionism.

Check out Theoi.com. That should keep you busy for, oh, years.

Quote
I found sort of park at the center of town and sat on a bench there for almost an hour.  I felt so aware of everything around me, I meditated, and I felt like I was connected to something around me.  I don't know how to describe it.

Sounds like you are beginning to open up and connect to the world around you. It don't think it was a particular god, I think it was the divinity of the universe, the web that connects everything.

Quote
I just don't know where to go from here.

Continue doing what you did. Listen to your intuition. Let it guide you. Experience different environments and weather patterns. Take notes on what you feel.

For Hellenic Paganism, check out the link above and try the Hellenic SIG here on the forum. Just browse and read and see if anything speaks to you. No need to rush.

nadkins733

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2012, 12:28:36 am »
Quote from: KcarieLynn;57510
I am VERY new to paganism. I was raised in a variety of Christian beliefs but never felt truly connected in that faith.  For the last couple of years I have considered myself agnostic.  I would always say "No one knows what is out there, and no one is supposed to know what is out there."  I was mostly content.

About a week ago, a friend told me about his beliefs in paganism.  I was curious, so I did a lot of research on Pagan Pride, read articles, forums, etc.  I have been mulling and reflecting on that information for a couple days.  I have been feeling drawn to Hellenic Reconstructionism.

I am currently living in west Connecticut and it stormed.  After the worst of it had passed, I decided to go for a walk in the rain.  I'm not sure why, it was dark and in hindsight was a bad idea, but I felt pulled to do so.  I found sort of park at the center of town and sat on a bench there for almost an hour.  I felt so aware of everything around me, I meditated, and I felt like I was connected to something around me.  I don't know how to describe it.

Am I connecting dots where dots shouldn't be connected?  Feeling things where there is nothing to be felt?  I just don't know how to interpret these things.  If you have a story or experience I would love to hear it.  Advice is appreciated.  I just don't know where to go from here.

Thank you!
Kcarie Lynn

 
Hello Kcarie, what you just described is exactly what i am going through as well. And your mediation experience is completely normal actually. Some of my friends who claimed to have had an experience with gods did it through meditation. but you dont have to believe in gods to be pagan really, there are so many options to choose from. its kind of over whelming... just do more research as well as mediation. its suppose to guide you i guess. but i am kinda new to this as well so if you want you can 'friend' me and we can help each other out!

AmethystFox

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2012, 12:05:22 pm »
Quote from: KcarieLynn;57510
I am VERY new to paganism. I was raised in a variety of Christian beliefs but never felt truly connected in that faith.  For the last couple of years I have considered myself agnostic.  I would always say "No one knows what is out there, and no one is supposed to know what is out there."  I was mostly content.

About a week ago, a friend told me about his beliefs in paganism.  I was curious, so I did a lot of research on Pagan Pride, read articles, forums, etc.  I have been mulling and reflecting on that information for a couple days.  I have been feeling drawn to Hellenic Reconstructionism.

I am currently living in west Connecticut and it stormed.  After the worst of it had passed, I decided to go for a walk in the rain.  I'm not sure why, it was dark and in hindsight was a bad idea, but I felt pulled to do so.  I found sort of park at the center of town and sat on a bench there for almost an hour.  I felt so aware of everything around me, I meditated, and I felt like I was connected to something around me.  I don't know how to describe it.

Am I connecting dots where dots shouldn't be connected?  Feeling things where there is nothing to be felt?  I just don't know how to interpret these things.  If you have a story or experience I would love to hear it.  Advice is appreciated.  I just don't know where to go from here.

Thank you!
Kcarie Lynn

 
If you do end up following a Pagan path-or just about any spiritual path, for that matter- you're gonna be asking that dots question for the rest of your life. What it comes down to, like TisiphoneSeraph said, is how much that dot pattern matters to you.

I'm just going to go ahead and second all the suggestions to do research. Try to ground your exploration in research and academic sources, as well as your personal experiences, and use other people's experiences with gods and goddesses sparingly.

KcarieLynn

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Re: I could really use some insight...
« Reply #6 on: June 03, 2012, 12:39:28 am »
First, thanks all for your insight.  I don't really know what I'm looking for, but your advice is helping me figure that out.

Quote from: nadkins733;57977
...if you want you can 'friend' me and we can help each other out!

 
I did "friend" you! Thank you for the offer, I would love to 'friend' others and have actual conversations with you!

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