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Author Topic: feeling scattered...help me find a general path  (Read 876 times)

Elune'ara

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feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« on: September 04, 2013, 03:11:24 am »
so I come from a very strict/conservative christian background but in the last two years have started veering off into something very different....whatever it is it feels better, like home. I feel happier, more peaceful, more spiritual, and grounded.

the problem is that I feel like I am in a "fluff" stage or maybe just very eclectic, smattering together things I feel good about, interested in, and make me feel connected with the Divine and the earth. I would like to list the things I am interested in and feeling drawn too and maybe some seasoned pagans can give me a certain tradition to focus on that may fit me better but I am just unaware of it as I am very new to everything.

It started with a simple interest in herbs and crystals for healing use...a good friend does a lot of alternative medicine type works and energy work and I was drawn to the grounded, and earthy feeling of what she does....turns out she is a high priestess of an eclectic gardenerian/dianic based wiccan circle and offered training. I have started this training with her and enjoy the diversity that I am learning but find myself interested in other things as well.

I am not a big fan of "high religion" because it makes me feel claustrophobic and forced into a certain box which I did not enjoy at all about the christian church I was in for 8 years. I like the idea of connecting with the God/Goddess/Divine/Creator on my own terms and being able to express my spirituality in whichever way I feel drawn.

I am interested in working with the fae/faeries

I deeply enjoy using oracle decks and tarot for divinatory purposes and everyday communication with the Divine

I enjoy basic magick with circle casting, minor spellwork, relatively simple ceremonies, communion with nature, full moon rituals.

I feel like what makes most sense to me is to call the Creator Gaia/Mother Earth and believe that we are all connected, earth, persons, animals, plants, all one , all energy.

I realize this all sounds very "fluffy" but to me it is honestly just a very confused beginning to something that feels right, home, core. I need help focusing and getting some basics under me so I don't end up feeling lost in items and ceremony instead of connecting with the Divine.....I feel like the wicca background I am getting from my training path is a good foundation, but ultimately I do feel drawn to what seems to be a more fluffy or eclectic "me-made" spirituality....and if everything I have written out here does seem to indicate to others that I may never be interested in just 1 certain tradition...is there a good way to create your own eclectic path without feeling so scattered and pulled in different directions?

Thank you to anyone who made it through all my late night ramblings and for any direction you can bless me with

bright love and blessings

Aspiria

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feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2013, 06:43:42 am »
Quote from: Elune'ara;120813
so I come from a very strict/conservative christian background but in the last two years have started veering off into something very different....whatever it is it feels better, like home. I feel happier, more peaceful, more spiritual, and grounded.

the problem is that I feel like I am in a "fluff" stage or maybe just very eclectic, smattering together things I feel good about, interested in, and make me feel connected with the Divine and the earth. I would like to list the things I am interested in and feeling drawn too and maybe some seasoned pagans can give me a certain tradition to focus on that may fit me better but I am just unaware of it as I am very new to everything.

It started with a simple interest in herbs and crystals for healing use...a good friend does a lot of alternative medicine type works and energy work and I was drawn to the grounded, and earthy feeling of what she does....turns out she is a high priestess of an eclectic gardenerian/dianic based wiccan circle and offered training. I have started this training with her and enjoy the diversity that I am learning but find myself interested in other things as well.

I am not a big fan of "high religion" because it makes me feel claustrophobic and forced into a certain box which I did not enjoy at all about the christian church I was in for 8 years. I like the idea of connecting with the God/Goddess/Divine/Creator on my own terms and being able to express my spirituality in whichever way I feel drawn.

I am interested in working with the fae/faeries

I deeply enjoy using oracle decks and tarot for divinatory purposes and everyday communication with the Divine

I enjoy basic magick with circle casting, minor spellwork, relatively simple ceremonies, communion with nature, full moon rituals.

I feel like what makes most sense to me is to call the Creator Gaia/Mother Earth and believe that we are all connected, earth, persons, animals, plants, all one , all energy.

I realize this all sounds very "fluffy" but to me it is honestly just a very confused beginning to something that feels right, home, core. I need help focusing and getting some basics under me so I don't end up feeling lost in items and ceremony instead of connecting with the Divine.....I feel like the wicca background I am getting from my training path is a good foundation, but ultimately I do feel drawn to what seems to be a more fluffy or eclectic "me-made" spirituality....and if everything I have written out here does seem to indicate to others that I may never be interested in just 1 certain tradition...is there a good way to create your own eclectic path without feeling so scattered and pulled in different directions?

Thank you to anyone who made it through all my late night ramblings and for any direction you can bless me with

bright love and blessings

This is me in a nutshell. Similar beliefs as yours minus the Wicca part. I nosed around in the part and although I liked some of it the idea of elaborate rituals and a sort of hierarchy were off putting to me. I lay claim to just being "eclectic" even after a year. I tried reading about all the paths, even craving a spreadsheet with the pros and cons of each ( was told that's a typical Libra trait lol). Then I hit a standstill. I know I'm still being "watched" by the Morrighan and a few others who aren't known. And I known the tarot cards said not to get flustered about my pat because I was Doing it the way I should and to not be impatient. Other than the thought in my head, and occasional glances on TC my studying was put on hold sort of. I have seven full time children now and I'm full time at school also. But I totally understand.

The best I can say is don't rush it, just let in roll in, and take it as it comes.

Aster Breo

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feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2013, 07:47:51 am »
Quote from: Elune'ara;120813
maybe some seasoned pagans can give me a certain tradition to focus on that may fit me better but I am just unaware of it as I am very new to everything.

Hi and Welcome to The Cauldron!

For what it's worth, this question is shared by pretty much everyone who is new to paganism. You are not alone. Everyone has to begin somewhere and everyone has questions. Here are a few links to help you get started:

TC's Pagan Primer: This is a resource designed as an introduction. It includes basic information and links to more specific info on a variety of pagan topics, including "Common Questions About Paganism".

TC's Teens and Paganism FAQ: This resource was originally intended to address the kinds of questions teen pagans struggle with, such as talking to parents about religion. However, the final product turned out to include a lot of great info that is useful to new pagans of any age, including many links to very useful resources. So, if you're not a teenager, just ignore the sections that don't apply to you.  

Seeking: First Steps & Tools:  This is a well organized and user friendly resource dedicated to providing the kinds of information and explanations that many new pagans don't even know they need.  The author, Jenett, is a long-time Cauldronite and experienced practitioner of a small religious witchcraft tradition.  (You can read more about Jenett's background in the "About Me" section of her site.)  The Seeking site includes detailed discussions of:
the basics of paganism
reaching out to other pagans
specific practices that are found in many pagan paths
some of the common questions asked by new pagans
a suggested reading list
a description of Conscious Awareness of Religious Environment (CARE) -- a method for evaluating pagan and magical groups for problematic behaviors
Each section includes numerous links to additional relevant material.

TC's Religious Special Interest Groups: In addition to folders on a wide variety of paganism-related topics, this forum also includes Special Interest Groups (SIGs) dedicated to the discussion of specific pagan paths. There are "sticky posts" on resources specific to each path at the top of the SIG folder, so you can easily find additional, in-depth information. TC's religious SIGs include:
Asatru and Heathenry
Flamekeeping (a path created by long-time Cauldronite HeartShadow)
Celtic Polytheism
Neo-Druidry
Reformed Kemeticism (based on the religion of ancient Egypt)
Hellenic Polytheism (based on the religion of ancient Greece)

(This list is missing a link to our latest SIG, about Slavic and Baltic Paganism. I'm using a "boilerplate" post we created to answer this very common question, but it was written before the most recent SIG began.  [Guess it needs to be updated now.] Because I'm writing this on my phone, though, I can't add a new link. But you should see it listed in the Religious SIGs folder.)

My advice is to take your time reading through the materials, do a lot of thinking, and ask lots of questions.  (The beginner friendly sections of the forum are especially good for that.) You have the additional resource of a teacher and group that you meet with in person, and they will likely be able to answer some of your questions and provide additional info.

Most importantly, though, don't rush. There's no deadline.  And the journey itself is as important as the destination.

Good luck!

~ Aster
"The status is not quo."  ~ Dr. Horrible

Jack

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feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2013, 11:20:22 am »
Quote from: Elune'ara;120813
.is there a good way to create your own eclectic path without feeling so scattered and pulled in different directions?

Well, you've gotten the links list so you know where to start. :) The best way to figure out what works for you, honestly, is to read everything you find that looks interesting, think critically about it, and follow the threads that interest you. The classes you're taking should give you a solid foundation to build on.
Hail Mara, Lady of Good Things!
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brad

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Re: feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2013, 05:02:15 pm »
Quote from: Elune'ara;120813

the problem is that I feel like I am in a "fluff" stage or maybe just very eclectic, smattering together things I feel good about, interested in, and make me feel connected with the Divine and the earth.


I have been in this seeker stage for a very long time.  About five years or so.  The links look interesting, definitely taking some time to look at.

For me, it's so frustrating, I end up giving up on it pretty regularly.  I've pretty well established the following though:
  • I like the concept of the four elements/watchtowers
  • I do not have a strong attraction to spell work
  • I do have a strong desire to do energy work
  • I very much enjoy tarot and numerology
  • I feel more connected with the energy of the night than the energy of the day
  • Friends and acquaintances are all the time telling me that I feel like a familiar person or mentor to them


So yea, I don't really know the answers either.  I wish I knew at least a couple though. ~Sigh~  Will be looking at the links though!

Aspiria, how are ya doin?  I've seen you around a good few months back. (Probably the last time I was here, to be honest.)  My offer still stands, if you want to talk / vent just let me know.  Last I knew, you were having a hard time with PM notifications on your mobile device.
The hardest part about being pagan, is being pagan.

pennylane

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Re: feeling scattered...help me find a general path
« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2013, 11:28:35 am »
Quote from: Elune'ara;120813

the problem is that I feel like I am in a "fluff" stage or maybe just very eclectic, smattering together things I feel good about, interested in, and make me feel connected with the Divine and the earth.

 
I feel very much the same way as you. I've been searching for my path for several years now, and still don't know which direction to head. The overwhelming amount of information (and misinformation) out there is sometimes very trying.

I identify with a lot of the same ideas that you mentioned. I'm still calling myself an Eclectic Pagan/ Witch at the moment. I'm focusing a lot on meditation, centering and grounding right now. Reading as much as I can about all different paths of paganism, and hoping to learn more from a community such as this (although, it's been a while since i've been here... hoping to change that!).  

I'm always available as well if anyone would like to chat! :)

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