A Plethora of Questions: Familiars, Incense, And Ways to Approach A God?

[Solar Sylvilagus]

This is going to be a lot of questions. First off, in terms of familiars, how does one find a familiar? I get the impression that one bonds with a pet, and then they come to rituals and lend their energy? At least in some descriptions of a familiar. Is there anyway to encourage your pet to become your familiar, or is it entirely up to the pet? I know my pets evacuate the area whenever I preform any type of witchcraft or ritual.

As for incense, a Goddess I've worked with, the Hindi Goddess Durga, really enjoys incense, but the ingredients sent me to the ER after a horrible allergic reaction. I'm okay now, but does anyone know of any incense that wouldn't set off allergies? Or, if not, any idea as to what else would be an appropriate offering?

Also, I have recently petitioned the Norse God, Tyr for help, as I've always been drawn to Him, and I believe He could help me. But I've never really approached a God who hasn't already shown interest in me before. Is there any way to sweeten the deal, and perhaps convince Him to help? I can't offer Him alcohol, as a lot of books have recommended, as I'm not of the legal age to buy liquor. Basically, what I'm looking for is a inexpensive, discreet offering that wouldn't set off suspicion in my parents.

And a question I couldn't fit in the title, a question about ancestors. My great grandmother was very abusive and generally horrible, but the point is she's been causing me trouble when I attempt to communicate with my other ancestors. When I first attempted to communicate with my grandfather, she popped in and scared me horribly. She's been showing up in my dreams and generally terrorizing me. I'm reluctant to make peace after all the ways she hurt my mother, I more want to get her out of my house and dreams. She has stopped harassing me after a firm reprimand and a petition to my matron to help with her, but she has continued to bother the rest of the family.

And last but not least, the question of spirits of the land. There is a spirit that is connected to the land my house is on, and seems to be attached to a giant oak tree in my yard. When I first became aware of her, our relationship was a bit rocky, but after I began caring for her tree, it improved greatly. I'm unsure of what sort of offerings to leave her, or if I should at all. I've attempted meditating under her tree in order to communicate with her, but so far it has been unsuccessful. What I want to know, most of all, are different ways to communicate with her.

This was a bit long, but thank you for reading! I hope you all can help me.

[Darkhawk]

This is going to be a lot of questions. First off, in terms of familiars, how does one find a familiar? I get the impression that one bonds with a pet, and then they come to rituals and lend their energy? At least in some descriptions of a familiar. Is there anyway to encourage your pet to become your familiar, or is it entirely up to the pet? I know my pets evacuate the area whenever I preform any type of witchcraft or ritual.

Traditionally speaking, one makes a deal with the devil and gets assigned an animal-shaped demon.  I tend towards the opinion that the concept of "a familiar" is mostly vastly overblown romanticism.  It's certainly neither required nor common, and is commonly perpetrated by people who mostly look to me like having an excessive anthropomorphism about their pets.

That being said, animals seem to often have one of two responses to magical stuff: either fascination with the working or clearing out.  The latter is safer for the work and the animals - fascinated pets will do things like set themselves on fire by poking at candles.

There are a number of routes to obtaining ally spirits of various forms, including the sort of fey/chthonic entity that would be a traditional familiar, but none of those are beginner work as far as I'm aware.

As for incense, a Goddess I've worked with, the Hindi Goddess Durga, really enjoys incense, but the ingredients sent me to the ER after a horrible allergic reaction. I'm okay now, but does anyone know of any incense that wouldn't set off allergies? Or, if not, any idea as to what else would be an appropriate offering?

That depends on what you're allergic to in the incense.  However, a lot of commercially produce incenses have lots of crap filler (in some cases, more literally urea filler, so, um, pee) that might be a trigger.  If you're reactign to the filler rather than the incense, you can try pure resins or incenses that operate under stricter ritual purity standards (traditional Japanese incenses can be good that way).  To burn a pure resin, I suggest putting a bit of foil over a deep bowl and sticking a candle under it rather than charcoal - charcoal can also set off allergies, and honestly I find the candle a whole lot easier to manage in general.

Another option is to get an oil diffuser and use scent oils or essential oils that are not triggers for you.  Which will require testing, of course.

Also, I have recently petitioned the Norse God, Tyr for help, as I've always been drawn to Him, and I believe He could help me. But I've never really approached a God who hasn't already shown interest in me before. Is there any way to sweeten the deal, and perhaps convince Him to help? I can't offer Him alcohol, as a lot of books have recommended, as I'm not of the legal age to buy liquor. Basically, what I'm looking for is a inexpensive, discreet offering that wouldn't set off suspicion in my parents.

Gods in general cross-culturally often operate under what amounts to favour-trading; the fancy term for this is "do ut des", "I give so that you continue to give".  This can include literal offerings such as alcohol or meals, but also things that further the goals of the god in question are relevant.  If seeking Tyr's help with a matter of justice, for example, one might make oneself more plausible a recipient by doing one's best to increase justice in one's own life.  Or, if that's not feasable, find something else of interest to the god in question and promote that.

And a question I couldn't fit in the title, a question about ancestors. My great grandmother was very abusive and generally horrible, but the point is she's been causing me trouble when I attempt to communicate with my other ancestors. When I first attempted to communicate with my grandfather, she popped in and scared me horribly. She's been showing up in my dreams and generally terrorizing me. I'm reluctant to make peace after all the ways she hurt my mother, I more want to get her out of my house and dreams. She has stopped harassing me after a firm reprimand and a petition to my matron to help with her, but she has continued to bother the rest of the family.

You can construct wards against specific entities.  You know who this one is, their name, and so on, which gives you a leg up on saying "You are not invited here."  You might also consider doing significant cleansing and purification work on your family line and relationships, which is good to do in general.

For nightmares in specific, I recommend putting a fresh, clean glass of water under the bed or by your pillow when you sleep.  It's a traditional remedy for nightmares, and very effective.  Empty the water down the drain in the morning!  It's supposed to absorb all the bad shit for you so it doesn't wind up in your dreams, you don't want to drink that crap.

And last but not least, the question of spirits of the land. There is a spirit that is connected to the land my house is on, and seems to be attached to a giant oak tree in my yard. When I first became aware of her, our relationship was a bit rocky, but after I began caring for her tree, it improved greatly. I'm unsure of what sort of offerings to leave her, or if I should at all. I've attempted meditating under her tree in order to communicate with her, but so far it has been unsuccessful. What I want to know, most of all, are different ways to communicate with her.

 
For landwights, it's important to just listen to the environment and see if you have impulses.  The spirits in my backyard, for example, seem to have a thing for little red berries, so I give them cranberries; on their own they produce pokeweed and other nasty things that produce round reddish berries, so, um.  Consistent, too.  (We're hoping to plant some hollies back there eventually.)

If you have something like a specific tree to work with, do some research: what sorts of things nurture and support oaks?  How can you provide it?  (I mean, if your land spirit fancied a rosebush I'd tell you to give banana peels - those make great compost for rosebushes.  I don't know oaks off the top of my head.)

[MeadowRae]

This is going to be a lot of questions. First off, in terms of familiars, how does one find a familiar? I get the impression that one bonds with a pet, and then they come to rituals and lend their energy? At least in some descriptions of a familiar. Is there anyway to encourage your pet to become your familiar, or is it entirely up to the pet? I know my pets evacuate the area whenever I preform any type of witchcraft or ritual.


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I don't believe in familiars, per se, but I believe that, like people, some animals have a natural inclination toward energy/the magical. Both my cat and my dog like to be very close to me during ritual, and my cat will actually wake up from his nap and join me. He used to get on the altar, but it's in a safer place now. It's funny Darkhawk mentioned the candles...my cat did catch his fur on fire once. (The smell was...not pleasant.)

I think it's up to the individual animal to participate/lend company to ritual. They find you, kind of like friends. You can't go up to somebody random and tell them they're in your coven now; I imagine it's the same with other creatures.

[Yei]

This is going to be a lot of questions. First off, in terms of familiars, how does one find a familiar? I get the impression that one bonds with a pet, and then they come to rituals and lend their energy? At least in some descriptions of a familiar. Is there anyway to encourage your pet to become your familiar, or is it entirely up to the pet? I know my pets evacuate the area whenever I preform any type of witchcraft or ritual.

I might be wrong on this, but I think that the Familiar is part of European Witchcraft. So if you don't intend to practise European magic I don't think a familiar is necessary, or even helpful for most rituals.

As for incense, a Goddess I've worked with, the Hindi Goddess Durga, really enjoys incense, but the ingredients sent me to the ER after a horrible allergic reaction. I'm okay now, but does anyone know of any incense that wouldn't set off allergies? Or, if not, any idea as to what else would be an appropriate offering?

Have you tried scented oils? I'm not sure if they'll do the same job, but they might be less harsh and they are worth a try.

And last but not least, the question of spirits of the land. There is a spirit that is connected to the land my house is on, and seems to be attached to a giant oak tree in my yard. When I first became aware of her, our relationship was a bit rocky, but after I began caring for her tree, it improved greatly. I'm unsure of what sort of offerings to leave her, or if I should at all. I've attempted meditating under her tree in order to communicate with her, but so far it has been unsuccessful. What I want to know, most of all, are different ways to communicate with her.

Well, you are not going to like this but incense. Just be careful not to start a fire, because I can't think of a worse way to sour a relationship with a tree.

[SunflowerP]

When I first became aware of her, our relationship was a bit rocky, but after I began caring for her tree, it improved greatly. I'm unsure of what sort of offerings to leave her, or if I should at all.

 
I would say that caring for her tree is one of the best possible offerings.

Sunflower