collapse

* Recent Posts

Re: "Christ Is King" by SunflowerP
[Yesterday at 11:06:51 pm]


Re: "Christ Is King" by SunflowerP
[Yesterday at 10:30:17 pm]


Re: "Christ Is King" by Darkhawk
[Yesterday at 08:31:19 pm]


Re: "Christ Is King" by Darkhawk
[Yesterday at 07:54:40 pm]


Re: "Christ Is King" by Sefiru
[Yesterday at 07:44:49 pm]

Author Topic: General/Non-Specific: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!  (Read 1987 times)

helen

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Join Date: Nov 2016
  • Posts: 5
  • Country: gb
  • Total likes: 1
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Er...
  • Preferred Pronouns: Female
(Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« on: April 23, 2018, 04:08:37 pm »
Hi, sorry to bother every one with a personal problem, but:

I don't know who/how to worship.  I've read about the different mythologies/pantheons, but none of them seem to 'click' as I've read happening in other people's experience.  I've tried just asking them just before I go to sleep 'is there any one there? please just tell me you're there,' and nothing's happened.

Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

ehbowen

  • Grand Master Member
  • *******
  • Join Date: Jul 2011
  • Location: Houston, Texas
  • Posts: 1396
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 286
  • A Ways Around the Bend...
    • View Profile
    • Streamliner Schedules
  • Religion: Southern Baptist
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #1 on: April 23, 2018, 04:53:49 pm »
Hi, sorry to bother every one with a personal problem, but:

I don't know who/how to worship.  I've read about the different mythologies/pantheons, but none of them seem to 'click' as I've read happening in other people's experience.  I've tried just asking them just before I go to sleep 'is there any one there? please just tell me you're there,' and nothing's happened.

Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

It's not uncommon. I would say to beware of deities who get too friendly too fast. They may be trying to sell you something. OTOH, the same dynamic may be in play on the Other Side as well. They may be discussing amongst themselves, asking, "Is this one a keeper?"

Edit To Add: In just about every belief system I am aware of, persistence is a virtue. Luke 18:1-8.
« Last Edit: April 23, 2018, 04:55:57 pm by ehbowen »
--------Eric H. Bowen
Where's the KABOOM? There was supposed to have been an Earth-shattering KABOOM!
Computers are like air conditioning. They become useless when you open Windows—Linus Torvalds.

helen

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Join Date: Nov 2016
  • Posts: 5
  • Country: gb
  • Total likes: 1
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Er...
  • Preferred Pronouns: Female
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2018, 06:03:53 pm »
I would say to beware of deities who get too friendly too fast. They may be trying to sell you something.

That's a way of thinking of it that I hadn't considered.  Thanks!

Sefiru

  • Senior Staff
  • *
  • Join Date: Nov 2013
  • Location: In the walls
  • Posts: 2570
  • Country: ca
  • Total likes: 893
    • View Profile
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #3 on: April 23, 2018, 06:42:24 pm »
Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

Direct contact with deities is actually pretty rare overall -- it just gets a lot of press.

In ancient times, people picked a deity to follow based on their profession, family or location without expecting any actual divine interaction. Most major organised religions these days also operate on the basis that most of their adherents won't directly experience anything.

Which is not to say that direct contact isn't desirable or worth seeking; just keep in mind that it's not essential, and you are not doing anything wrong if you don't get any.

Do you have any specific reasons for wanting direct contact with a deity?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Me on AO3 & Deviantart

Jenett

  • Senior Staff
  • *
  • Join Date: Jun 2011
  • Location: Boston, MA
  • Posts: 3743
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 1235
    • View Profile
    • Seeking: First steps on a path
  • Religion: Initiatory religious witchcraft
  • Preferred Pronouns: she/her
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #4 on: April 23, 2018, 06:46:29 pm »
Hi, sorry to bother every one with a personal problem, but:

This is exactly the kind of question this folder is here for! Not a bother, and please feel free ask more things like this as they come up for you!

Quote
I don't know who/how to worship.  I've read about the different mythologies/pantheons, but none of them seem to 'click' as I've read happening in other people's experience.  I've tried just asking them just before I go to sleep 'is there any one there? please just tell me you're there,' and nothing's happened.

Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

First, what you're experiencing is almost certain by far the most common experience. Both currently and historically, people getting fairly clear direct commentary from deities is generally the exception, not the rule. And often, y'know, that direct commentary is not always comfortable.

Some places online (and this is one) collect more than the average number of people for whom that happens sometimes, for a variety of reasons (one of them being that people who want to talk about that aspect will look for each other, and the Internet makes it somewhat easier to do that.)

But the "I do my thing, I make offerings, I pay attention, and not a whole lot happens most of the time" is probably the norm for most of humanity, most of the time.

That said, there are some things you can try if you'd like to see if you can find/deepen a relationship with a deity:

1) Shake up what you're trying

The method I was taught as part of my training is explained in general terms on my Seeking site (that'll take you right to the four relevant articles - and while I'm here, Darkhawk's take on this is also relevant to your interests).

It involved researching a number of different deities (focusing on ones the group worked with regularly or that are common points of reference in the larger Pagan community and likely to be relevant to attending public rituals - makes sense as a place to start right? Brigid, Hecate, etc. Your 'rituals I might reasonably attend' common deities may vary, but looking at public ritual announcements for a bit should give you some ideas.)

The research was meant to be a starting point, not exhaustive, an introduction (overview of them and their major associations, a key story or two, etc.) We also had to do some sort of creative project - and for me and a number of people, that was the really powerful piece. If you're not sure how to explore, I might pick deities who seem even vaguely intriguing to you based on your interests, goals, or what you want to be more like, and try out four or six of those (moving on learning about another deity in a month or two, each time.)

The goal here is not to make commitments or promises - you don't even have to do any specific ritual (and probably it's better not to, other than "Hi, I'm curious about learning more about you.")

The goal is to get a better sense for what direction you might want to head in, what stuff seems to resonate for you better, either because of a particular kind of deity focus, or because you hit on practices that work better for you (for values of better that are 'make you feel connected/inspired/moved in useful directions for you'.) By the time you've done this six times or so, you will probably have a much better idea of what you want to focus on next.

2) Understand open-headed vs. close-headed

These are descriptions for a spectrum of interaction with deities and beings and generally being sensitive to stuff around you magically/energetically - some people are way at one end of the spectrum, some are way at the other end, and a lot of people are somewhere in the middle.

Really open-headed people are the people who get deities and ancestors and random trees talking to them all the time, and their issues are usually more about setting limits on it (please do not wake me up at 3am telling me you have a squirrel.) - and in fact, this kind of open-headedness can be a really big issue if you want to hold down a day job, or need to focus on other things, or you know, like getting sleep. 

People who are closed-headed tend not to get much data of this kind at all, and so they can struggle with feeling like there's any connection or any meaningful connection. They may have trouble sensing energy, so ritual or magic can be hard because they don't feel like it's doing anything. This is much less of an issue in ordinary daily life, but can be really frustrating if you want those magical overwhelming experiences.

Fortunately, most people are a) somewhere in the middle and b) there are skills you can learn on both ends of the spectrum that can help moderate your experiences. The book I know that has the best discussion of this is Diana Paxson's Trance-Portation, but a lot of materials about centering/grounding/shielding and evaluating experiences with deity (on the open-headed end) and intuitive work, meditation, divination practice, and deliberately making time regularly to open up your senses and experience different things on the closed-headed side both are options.

Sort of like introversion/extroversion, though (recharging while alone vs. recharging by being around other people), knowing which way you tend can be a big help.

3) Know thyself

I get almost no deity info via dreams (one really significant one, a handful of 'I'm pretty sure that's meaningful, but I have no clue what to do with it' and a lot of 'I'm pretty sure that's a mostly symbolic large dinosaur'). Expecting to dream about one is probably not a good place to put my hopes!

On the other hand, I have a pretty good record (now it's established) with feeling M'Lady present in quiet ways, and knowing what she wants (and as long as I don't expect coherent language out of the deal, it works great.) And when I have a ritual structure to support it, I can do a really solid Draw Down, and for at least a couple of deities.

And on the energetic level, there are some kinds of things that will exhaust me fast (the emotional energy of crowds), and I have to shield and do a lot of fairly direct management about it to be functional for long.

Your preferences are almost certainly different, but I hope that illustrates how most people it's a mixture - I know people who are really really openheaded, but can't do much with it because it's an overwhelming amount of data. I know people who are really closed-headed unless they set up really specific ritual practices to open the door. I know people who are great intuitive readers, but get very little direct or no deity info ever.

4) Consider specific ritual technologies

One final option - a complicated one, but it's out there - is looking at ways to bridge your own skills. For example, there are a number of religious traditions, both witchcraft and otherwise where a deity speaks through the body of the priest or priestess.

On one hand, this is not something to do lightly. On the other hand, it can be a really useful and amazing way to break through a block in deity communication, clear up specific things, and otherwise get to an understanding that would take years by other routes. Somewhat less complex forms can be done with a strong invocation and some method of communicating through runes/divination/etc. while in ritual.

This is definitely not a 'try at home' thing - but it's a thing that if you decide to do group work, or become engaged in a community where that's part of the practice, you can have some very meaningful experiences, regardless of your own ability to open up for it. (It does also bring the challenge of interpreting what you get, and one of the risks of this, as a participant listening, is that people do sometimes manipulate what's said or how it's said for their own benefit. Darkhawk has an excellent article on this.
Seek Knowledge, Find Wisdom: Research help on esoteric and eclectic topics (consulting and other services)

Seeking: first steps on a Pagan path (advice for seekers and people new to Paganism)

Noctua

  • Journeyman
  • *****
  • Join Date: Apr 2016
  • Posts: 239
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 125
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Blue Star Wicca
  • Preferred Pronouns: she/her
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2018, 06:53:24 pm »
Hi, sorry to bother every one with a personal problem, but:

I don't know who/how to worship.  I've read about the different mythologies/pantheons, but none of them seem to 'click' as I've read happening in other people's experience.  I've tried just asking them just before I go to sleep 'is there any one there? please just tell me you're there,' and nothing's happened.

Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

So in my experience not everyone will get thwapped by the Gods- sometimes, like in my instance, you have to thwap them. So I'll share the rather circuitous route that brought me to Minerva.

Some years ago when I was new to this whole "paganism" thing and just googling anything and everything and following links down rabbit holes I came across a bit of info on archaic constellations in astronomy, and found out that within Libra (my sun sign) there's an asterism that's been called Noctua in the past. Noctua after Athene noctua, or the little owl, who is a symbol for both Athena and Minerva. I started looking at the two of them, Minerva especially because she's less focused on the war aspect and my ancestry is from the Italian peninsula.

When I found out that she's real big into learning, crafting (especially fiber arts), and medicine I thought "hey I'm really into all those things too" so I decided to approach her by just acknowledging her and setting up a small shrine for her. It seems that she enjoyed my attention because things in my life started to go really well after that time, so I took that as a positive sign. Since then I've asked her for small favors (my most common one is "I have a test today, I've studied, help me see the questions clearly and apply what I've learned") and given her offerings as thanks after good grades.

So long story short, I think you need to get to know the gods the same way you get to know new friends. I wouldn't really feel like making friends with someone who just stood on a street corner and asked anyone walking by to be their friend. I make friends by doing something in common, and finding out we have other things in common, and then getting to know them better, and then eventually we click and we're friends. And sometimes we don't click, but that's OK because there are other people (gods) that share other interests I have.

Hariti

  • Sr. Master Member
  • *******
  • Join Date: Mar 2017
  • Location: Washington
  • *
  • Posts: 942
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 320
  • Kyrie Eleison
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Extremely Eclectic
  • Preferred Pronouns: she/they
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #6 on: April 24, 2018, 01:29:20 am »
Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

There's no guarantee you will get a clear indication of anything, at least not at first. The most I ever get is vague feelings and notions, not exactly direct communication, and it's taken me years to even get to this point. Some times, I still wonder if it's all just made-up and I'm just feeling what I want to feel. Religion can be that way; it's hard to get a clear answer and uncertainty is the norm.
"The worshippers of the gods go to them; to the manes go the ancestor-worshippers; to the Deities who preside over the elements go their worshippers; My devotees come to Me." ... "Whichever devotee desires to adore whatever such Deity with faith, in all such votaries I make that particular faith unshakable. Endowed with that faith, a votary performs the worship of that particular deity and obtains the fruits thereof, these being granted by Me alone." - Sri Krishna

Morbid

  • Master Member
  • ******
  • Join Date: Jul 2017
  • Location: NORTH CAROLINA
  • Posts: 265
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 59
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Pagan
  • Preferred Pronouns: he/him/his
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2018, 03:02:19 am »
Hi, sorry to bother every one with a personal problem, but:

I don't know who/how to worship.  I've read about the different mythologies/pantheons, but none of them seem to 'click' as I've read happening in other people's experience.  I've tried just asking them just before I go to sleep 'is there any one there? please just tell me you're there,' and nothing's happened.

Is there just - no one there to speak to me?

I can't really speak for others but can speak for my own experiences.  In a lot of ways, I honor Anubis everytime that I work.  So I was very open to anything that would be out there.  Then I just kinda got this feeling to do some research on Anubis and it well...clicked for me.  So I suppose the only advice I would offer is to stop worrying about it, let them come to you.  I've found that sometimes when you worry constantly and you try to force something, nothing happens.  But when you forget about it, it comes to you.
For he who has truly lived never truly dies.

demoiselle

  • Apprentice
  • ***
  • Join Date: May 2018
  • Location: NYC
  • Posts: 20
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
  • Religion: Agnostic/seeking
Re: (Whiny voice)No one's talking to me!
« Reply #8 on: May 08, 2018, 10:26:24 pm »
That said, there are some things you can try if you'd like to see if you can find/deepen a relationship with a deity:

1) Shake up what you're trying

The method I was taught as part of my training is explained in general terms on my Seeking site (that'll take you right to the four relevant articles - and while I'm here, Darkhawk's take on this is also relevant to your interests).

It involved researching a number of different deities (focusing on ones the group worked with regularly or that are common points of reference in the larger Pagan community and likely to be relevant to attending public rituals - makes sense as a place to start right? Brigid, Hecate, etc. Your 'rituals I might reasonably attend' common deities may vary, but looking at public ritual announcements for a bit should give you some ideas.)

The research was meant to be a starting point, not exhaustive, an introduction (overview of them and their major associations, a key story or two, etc.) We also had to do some sort of creative project - and for me and a number of people, that was the really powerful piece. If you're not sure how to explore, I might pick deities who seem even vaguely intriguing to you based on your interests, goals, or what you want to be more like, and try out four or six of those (moving on learning about another deity in a month or two, each time.)

The goal here is not to make commitments or promises - you don't even have to do any specific ritual (and probably it's better not to, other than "Hi, I'm curious about learning more about you.")

Thank you for this. It is very useful.

Tags:
 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
3 Replies
2434 Views
Last post July 09, 2011, 03:02:15 pm
by entwife
6 Replies
4250 Views
Last post April 14, 2013, 05:08:39 pm
by WarriorBreedRaAkhKhem
0 Replies
2320 Views
Last post October 14, 2013, 08:31:05 pm
by mlr52
30 Replies
4650 Views
Last post October 30, 2013, 10:08:02 pm
by outlaw393
12 Replies
2479 Views
Last post November 30, 2015, 09:40:53 am
by Gigi Kiersten

Beginner Area

Warning: You are currently in a Beginner Friendly area of the message board.

* Who's Online

  • Dot Guests: 214
  • Dot Hidden: 0
  • Dot Users: 0

There aren't any users online.

* Please Donate!

The Cauldron's server is expensive and requires monthly payments. Please become a Bronze, Silver or Gold Donor if you can. Donations are needed every month. Without member support, we can't afford the server.

* Shop & Support TC

The links below are affiliate links. When you click on one of these links you will go to the listed shopping site with The Cauldron's affiliate code. Any purchases you make during your visit will earn TC a tiny percentage of your purchase price at no extra cost to you.

* In Memoriam

Chavi (2006)
Elspeth (2010)
Marilyn (2013)

* Cauldron Staff

Host:
Sunflower

Message Board Staff
Board Coordinator:
Darkhawk

Assistant Board Coordinator:
Aster Breo

Senior Staff:
Aisling, Allaya, Jenett, Sefiru

Staff:
Ashmire, EclecticWheel, HarpingHawke, Kylara, PerditaPickle, rocquelaire

Discord Chat Staff
Chat Coordinator:
Morag

'Up All Night' Coordinator:
Altair

Cauldron Council:
Bob, Catja, Chatelaine, Emma-Eldritch, Fausta, Jubes, Kelly, LyricFox, Phouka, Sperran, Star, Steve, Tana

Site Administrator:
Randall

SimplePortal 2.3.6 © 2008-2014, SimplePortal