collapse

* "Unable to verify referring url. Please go back and try again" Problem Logging In?

If you get an "Unable to verify referring url. Please go back and try again" error when you try to log in, you need to be sure you are accessing the board with a url that starts with "https://ecauldron.com".  If it starts with https://www.ecauldron.com" (or "http://www.ecauldron.com") you will get this error because "www.ecauldron.com" is not technically the same website as "ecauldron.com". Moving to the more secure "https" means it is more picky about such things.

Author Topic: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)  (Read 5819 times)

Catherine

  • Sr. Master Member
  • *******
  • Join Date: Jul 2011
  • Posts: 990
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #15 on: July 23, 2014, 07:15:59 pm »
Quote from: Jenett;153741


 
Ah, I was thinking loose as in not tied back, or bound at all.

But yeah, I'm growing quite a collection of various hair clips, bands, scarves, barrettes, you name it. A lot of it is trial and error. My hair is very straight and fine, though I have a lot of it (now that my meds are right) growing out of my head. So, some things just slide right out, while others pull too tight. Braids are becoming an option as it gets longer, so that's helpful.

Jenett

  • Senior Staff
  • *
  • Join Date: Jun 2011
  • Location: Boston, MA
  • Posts: 3291
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 788
    • View Profile
    • Seeking: First steps on a path
  • Religion: Initiatory religious witchcraft
  • Preferred Pronouns: she/her
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #16 on: July 23, 2014, 07:30:58 pm »
Quote from: Catherine;153748
Ah, I was thinking loose as in not tied back, or bound at all.

But yeah, I'm growing quite a collection of various hair clips, bands, scarves, barrettes, you name it. A lot of it is trial and error. My hair is very straight and fine, though I have a lot of it (now that my meds are right) growing out of my head. So, some things just slide right out, while others pull too tight. Braids are becoming an option as it gets longer, so that's helpful.

 
I do sometimes wear it completely loose (and honestly, if I were just *in* ritual, rather than running it, as I tend to be these days, either personal ritual or group ritual when there's that) that's actually pretty easy and I did it all the time during training. But if I'm likely to be near an altar with candles for more than the time it takes to light the one I'm working with (i.e. leading ritual, or standing by the altar to hand other people things), I generally prefer safer.

Part of why I grew my hair out originally is that I am moderately allergic to my own hair, so having it out of my face has always just been a thing that has to happen, whether I do that by some mechanical thing like a hair clip, or by it being long enough to stay back on its own.
Seek Knowledge, Find Wisdom: Research help on esoteric and eclectic topics (consulting and other services)

Seeking: first steps on a Pagan path (advice for seekers and people new to Paganism)

random417

  • Journeyman
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jul 2014
  • Posts: 237
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #17 on: July 23, 2014, 07:35:40 pm »
Quote from: Sage;153743
There are many different ways to approach religion and some are less serious than others. Some of the most serious religious stuff I've done has been very silly and inspired a sense of play in me. Sometimes it's just fun to hang out with people and wear faerie wings and get excited to be in an environment where there are others like you. And sometimes that experience of fun is, itself, an expression of spirituality.

I wrote a small article on play and magick for my Order. I've gotta check, but I doubt anybody will mind if I share it. I'll dig it up when I get back home. Might be something you'd enjoy.
"Let it be that state of manyhood bound and loathing. So with thy all; thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is in every way perfect."

AL 1:42-44

Jack

  • Adept Member
  • ********
  • Join Date: Apr 2012
  • Location: Cascadia
  • Posts: 3181
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 98
    • View Profile
    • Dwarvenpunk
  • Religion: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • Preferred Pronouns: he/him/his
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #18 on: July 23, 2014, 08:49:54 pm »
Quote from: random417;153746
As much as I go all out for ritual, me too. The point of ANY ritual wear is to be different from the day to day. To wear something outlandish in ritual can be acceptable, depending on the ritual, but every day? Even at a festival that's absurd.

 
I don't know what festivals you're thinking of, but I'm picturing something like Faerieworlds - which is fairly explicitly not part of the day to day. I know lots of people who would wear faerie wings or glitter or a tail to Faerieworlds but wouldn't on a day to day basis.
Hail Mara, Lady of Good Things!
"The only way to cope with something deadly serious is to try to treat it a little lightly." -Madeleine L'Engle

Sage

  • Adept Member
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2011
  • Posts: 2186
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
    • http://sageandstarshine.wordpress.com
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #19 on: July 23, 2014, 08:57:20 pm »
Quote from: Jack;153754
I don't know what festivals you're thinking of, but I'm picturing something like Faerieworlds - which is fairly explicitly not part of the day to day. I know lots of people who would wear faerie wings or glitter or a tail to Faerieworlds but wouldn't on a day to day basis.

 
Seems particularly apt for a festival named Faerieworlds, after all.

Side note - whatever the event, any sort of convention or festival comes across as a "between the worlds" feeling to me anyway. The same vibe I got at Pagan Pride Day I also got at local sci-fantasy-comic conventions or at a furry con I went to a few years back. Ears, tails, faerie wings, cosplay, costume makeup, and other stuff were all the order of the day. It added to the "this is our time, this is our space" feel of things. It also tends to be celebratory from what I've seen, whether it's a declaration of identity or just happiness at being in a place where... well, you can put on faerie wings and a stuffed fox tail and have it be part of the experience.
Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.

-Canticle of Trials 1:10

Sage and Starshine (my spiritual blog): last updated 2/25.
Friday Otherfaith Blogging: last updated 2/27
Join the Emboatening Crew over on Kiva! Emboatening the boatless since Opet 2013.

Scales

  • Master Member
  • ******
  • Join Date: Nov 2013
  • Location: BC
  • Posts: 376
  • Country: ca
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #20 on: July 23, 2014, 09:16:52 pm »
Quote from: Sage;153755
Side note - whatever the event, any sort of convention or festival comes across as a "between the worlds" feeling to me anyway. The same vibe I got at Pagan Pride Day I also got at local sci-fantasy-comic conventions or at a furry con I went to a few years back. Ears, tails, faerie wings, cosplay, costume makeup, and other stuff were all the order of the day. It added to the "this is our time, this is our space" feel of things. It also tends to be celebratory from what I've seen, whether it's a declaration of identity or just happiness at being in a place where... well, you can put on faerie wings and a stuffed fox tail and have it be part of the experience.

 
This is the hardest thing to explain about conventions and other events to other people for me and you just worded it up wonderfully.

random417

  • Journeyman
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jul 2014
  • Posts: 237
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #21 on: July 23, 2014, 09:28:14 pm »
Quote from: Sage;153755
Seems particularly apt for a festival named Faerieworlds, after all.

Side note - whatever the event, any sort of convention or festival comes across as a "between the worlds" feeling to me anyway. The same vibe I got at Pagan Pride Day I also got at local sci-fantasy-comic conventions or at a furry con I went to a few years back. Ears, tails, faerie wings, cosplay, costume makeup, and other stuff were all the order of the day. It added to the "this is our time, this is our space" feel of things. It also tends to be celebratory from what I've seen, whether it's a declaration of identity or just happiness at being in a place where... well, you can put on faerie wings and a stuffed fox tail and have it be part of the experience.
I was trying to word it properly, and you snuck it in, better than I could've explained it. +1, liked, all that stuff.
"Let it be that state of manyhood bound and loathing. So with thy all; thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is in every way perfect."

AL 1:42-44

endlessGalaxy

  • Apprentice
  • ***
  • Join Date: Jul 2014
  • Posts: 21
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #22 on: July 23, 2014, 09:50:22 pm »
Quote from: Kahina;153713
So, my mind has been all over the place. If anybody has seen what I've been posting, I've jumped from spirit summoning to priestesthood (although, if you think about it, this can kind of go hand-in-hand with performing priestess-like duties).

Now, I want to talk about what kind of things a person can wear when they're performing their magick.For me, I think I want something that reminds me of the ocean - a symbol of where my energy is drawn and what I carry with me as I perform. Granted, I know you don't need anything fancy, but I'm really passionate about immersing myself into my practice, so I'd actually love to try and find more 'formal' wear, you know?

What kinds of things do you like to dress up in? How often? Do you feel closer to your practice when you do?


I haven't done many spells yet.  But when I imagine myself doing them, thinking about what I'd like to do, where I'd like to do them, etc, I always imagine myself in a very comfortable outfit, one I'd usually wear day to day.  I would honestly just wear my regular clothes, but ones that are right out of the laundry.  So, a pair of black leggings, tank top, and a comfy cardigan or sweater.  I feel very sensitive to clothing so it's imperative I wear something that lets me focus on the task at hand instead of thinking about my clothing.

Scales

  • Master Member
  • ******
  • Join Date: Nov 2013
  • Location: BC
  • Posts: 376
  • Country: ca
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #23 on: July 23, 2014, 10:16:47 pm »
Quote from: Kahina;153713
What kinds of things do you like to dress up in? How often? Do you feel closer to your practice when you do?

 
And on the strange off-chance someone's curious, I like wearing plain, soft-but-not-stretch, sleeveless dresses. Colour can matter, doesn't always. I'm not able to afford to buy or make more ritual wear, so what I have is what I have and generally has to double as, you know, clothes.

I'd like to get/make and dedicate a dress or two and a robe for over them (for both atmosphere and warmth when doing outdoor stuff) in the future.

I also occasionally wear jewelry, depending what I'm doing. I always wear my rings from my husband, but pendants or bracelets get added. There's no pentacle necklace or equivalent, although I used to have something like it.

When is almost every time, but sometimes just if I feel up to it. I'm usually alone, so nude or nude+jewelry are also options indoors. If so, I am even more adamant about making sure my hair is brushed and body clean.

It makes me feel more clean and more prepared. Not just literally clean, but like cutting something with a razor rather than a saw. It's not closer to my practice, but it definitely is an enhancement.
--

Regarding the more garish costumes- Part of me says 'why is it my business' and part of me says 'you're making me look bad.' Of course, I let the first part rule, because I'm a sensible person (or I'd like to think so), but yes, it does cross my mind that over the top costumes and sparkles are a bit... something.
But as well as 'not my business' the 'yay community' feeling overrides that.

Darkhawk

  • Senior Staff
  • *
  • Join Date: Jun 2011
  • Posts: 4946
  • Country: us
  • Total likes: 846
    • View Profile
    • Suns in her Branches
  • Religion: An American Werewolf in the Akhet; Kemetic; Feri; Imaginary Baltic Heathen; Discordian; CoX; Etc.
  • Preferred Pronouns: any of he, she, they
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #24 on: July 23, 2014, 11:17:34 pm »
Quote from: Scales;153765
Regarding the more garish costumes- Part of me says 'why is it my business' and part of me says 'you're making me look bad.'

 
I am genuinely baffled by the notion that I could be made to look bad by someone else's trousers.  I'm not wearing them, so they're not showing my arse.

Can anyone explain?
as the water grinds the stone
we rise and fall
as our ashes turn to dust
we shine like stars    - Covenant, "Bullet"

Scales

  • Master Member
  • ******
  • Join Date: Nov 2013
  • Location: BC
  • Posts: 376
  • Country: ca
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #25 on: July 24, 2014, 12:19:51 am »
Quote from: Darkhawk;153766
I am genuinely baffled by the notion that I could be made to look bad by someone else's trousers.  I'm not wearing them, so they're not showing my arse.

Can anyone explain?

 
I admitted it's dumb, but it's a knee jerk reaction.

That said, it's because outside-people see you with someone who you think looks silly and stuff, and so you think the outside people will think that person looks even sillier, and that by association you'll look dumb.

But, I'm kind of paranoid, even though appearances usually aren't why.

Emma Eldritch

  • Staff
  • *
  • Join Date: May 2012
  • Posts: 1265
  • Country: 00
  • Total likes: 68
    • View Profile
    • https://rocknrollwitch.blogspot.ca/
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #26 on: July 24, 2014, 02:13:41 am »
Quote from: Scales;153770
I admitted it's dumb, but it's a knee jerk reaction.

That said, it's because outside-people see you with someone who you think looks silly and stuff, and so you think the outside people will think that person looks even sillier, and that by association you'll look dumb.

But, I'm kind of paranoid, even though appearances usually aren't why.

 
It may be dumb, but I understand what you're getting at, I think. It's the "I swear I'm not with them" reaction. You assume others will judge you because of the company you keep. You don't want to be dismissed because you're standing around with people wearing wings or whatever - you want to be taken seriously. The fact that these strangers judging you might be total dickbags doesn't seem to matter in the moment.

I feel the same way if I'm out with people in sweat pants, if it makes you feel any better, Scales.

Scales

  • Master Member
  • ******
  • Join Date: Nov 2013
  • Location: BC
  • Posts: 376
  • Country: ca
  • Total likes: 5
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #27 on: July 24, 2014, 03:09:53 am »
Quote from: Mama Fortuna;153772
It may be dumb, but I understand what you're getting at, I think. It's the "I swear I'm not with them" reaction. You assume others will judge you because of the company you keep. You don't want to be dismissed because you're standing around with people wearing wings or whatever - you want to be taken seriously. The fact that these strangers judging you might be total dickbags doesn't seem to matter in the moment.

I feel the same way if I'm out with people in sweat pants, if it makes you feel any better, Scales.

 
It actually does, thanks. And it's not like you actually want to not be with them, a lot of the time, they're people you like or would/could like- that girl in the wings looks really sweet, or your buddy is a genius in sweats, but the 'ahhh I'm not them' kind of takes over and sometimes even if you think you'd like that person you start distancing yourself.

Getting offtopic, this is a reason I never meet people. Not in the kind of meme-y suffix to a post way, but literally. That and that I'm scared they'll be way too good at being whatever they are for me to keep up. Which I guess adds that subconsciously, the people I think make me look bad also intimidate me.

(hopefully the rambling made sense, I'm sleepy but I really empathized and wanted to finish my thought.

Kahina

  • Apprentice
  • ***
  • Join Date: Jul 2014
  • Posts: 40
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #28 on: July 24, 2014, 05:21:04 am »
Quote from: Jenett;153747
Oh, meant to add to my original: my actual *guidelines* for what I think people should wear in ritual. (Though, y'know, not like I care unless you're in ritual with me in specific, when I might.)

1) Is it safe?

Long flowy sleeves are gorgeous, but also fire hazards. (So is polyester fabric.) If you wear a long skirt or cloak, be absolutely sure you know how to handle it so other people don't step on it.

2) Is it allow you to do the ritual?

If you are going to be doing a lot of deep breathing meditation things, jeans may not be your friend: they can be quite restrictive of your body. Some kinds of clothing is easier to sit on the floor of the ritual space in than others. If your feet get cold in ritual, you want socks or sacred slippers or something. Cold feet are not conducive to good ritual experiences.

3) Does it enhance the feel of the ritual?

Some paths put things on altars. Often, the altar is both a 'place to put the tools we're using' but also a visual focus for the ritual. The people in the ritual are also a visual focus for the ritual.

If you're doing ritual by yourself, this is not a problem (you're not looking at yourself, generally). If you're doing ritual with other people, having everyone dressed in a way that suits the ritual style and purpose helps a lot.

This can be simple (everyone wears seasonal colours) or complicated (some traditions have matching sets of ritual robes all in the same cut or colour) or somewhere in between (people wear clothing that makes them feel magical or like they're stepping outside of their daily lives, into a space where the ritual can have a more powerful effect). Some traditions do other things (working skyclad is a way of visually indicating 'we are outside regular space and time') or have specific things that only the ritual leaders wear, for similar reasons.

Good group ritual is very often also good *theatre*. Theatre has costumes, because we respond to what we see and how clothing moves, and what the clothing makes easier and harder for us to do. (A properly fitted Renaissance bodice does very different things to someone's posture than a three piece suit or a draping chiton or mainstream 21st century business casual.)

All of those can be powerful tools, and like any powerful tool, I tend to think that thinking about it is a good idea before you make your decisions (or deride other people's choices.)

 
Excellent guidelines. Something I'll keep in mind when I assess the nature of my ritual.
"be careful, you are not in Wonderland. i\'ve heard the strange madness long growing in your soul, in your isolation."

Kahina

  • Apprentice
  • ***
  • Join Date: Jul 2014
  • Posts: 40
  • Total likes: 0
    • View Profile
Re: you're gonna show up to a ritual in that? (dressing up during spells)
« Reply #29 on: July 24, 2014, 05:26:04 am »
Quote from: Scales;153765
And on the strange off-chance someone's curious, I like wearing plain, soft-but-not-stretch, sleeveless dresses. Colour can matter, doesn't always. I'm not able to afford to buy or make more ritual wear, so what I have is what I have and generally has to double as, you know, clothes.

I'd like to get/make and dedicate a dress or two and a robe for over them (for both atmosphere and warmth when doing outdoor stuff) in the future.

I also occasionally wear jewelry, depending what I'm doing. I always wear my rings from my husband, but pendants or bracelets get added. There's no pentacle necklace or equivalent, although I used to have something like it.

When is almost every time, but sometimes just if I feel up to it. I'm usually alone, so nude or nude+jewelry are also options indoors. If so, I am even more adamant about making sure my hair is brushed and body clean.

It makes me feel more clean and more prepared. Not just literally clean, but like cutting something with a razor rather than a saw. It's not closer to my practice, but it definitely is an enhancement.
--

Regarding the more garish costumes- Part of me says 'why is it my business' and part of me says 'you're making me look bad.' Of course, I let the first part rule, because I'm a sensible person (or I'd like to think so), but yes, it does cross my mind that over the top costumes and sparkles are a bit... something.
But as well as 'not my business' the 'yay community' feeling overrides that.

 
That's what I was thinking. Sometimes it's just nice to approach the altar/ritual dressed up because I see it as another way to demonstrate intent.

-

And, in response to the whole 'garish' costumes - so what? Some people do want to feel special. Some people just want to try and make their practice like any other part of their life. I see nothing wrong with it - besides, we gotta have fun sometimes.
"be careful, you are not in Wonderland. i\'ve heard the strange madness long growing in your soul, in your isolation."

Tags:
 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
41 Replies
4210 Views
Last post November 16, 2013, 05:45:39 pm
by Hyacinth Belle
5 Replies
1124 Views
Last post March 28, 2014, 05:29:23 pm
by Jenett
7 Replies
1689 Views
Last post May 01, 2015, 02:02:06 am
by Olie
5 Replies
1149 Views
Last post December 30, 2015, 12:40:58 pm
by Kylara
5 Replies
718 Views
Last post December 01, 2017, 09:57:07 am
by Jainarayan

* Who's Online

  • Dot Guests: 54
  • Dot Hidden: 0
  • Dot Users: 3
  • Dot Users Online:

* Please Donate!

The Cauldron's server is expensive and requires monthly payments. Please become a Bronze, Silver or Gold Donor if you can. Donations are needed every month. Without member support, we can't afford the server.

* Shop & Support TC

The links below are affiliate links. When you click on one of these links you will go to the listed shopping site with The Cauldron's affiliate code. Any purchases you make during your visit will earn TC a tiny percentage of your purchase price at no extra cost to you.

* In Memoriam

Chavi (2006)
Elspeth (2010)
Marilyn (2013)

* Cauldron Staff

Host:
Sunflower

Message Board Staff
Board Coordinator:
Darkhawk

Assistant Board Coordinator:
Aster Breo

Senior Staff:
Aisling, Jenett, Sefiru

Staff:
Allaya, Chatelaine, EclecticWheel, HarpingHawke, Kylara, PerditaPickle, rocquelaire

Discord Chat Staff
Chat Coordinator:
Morag

Cauldron Council:
Bob, Catja, Emma-Eldritch, Fausta, Jubes, Kelly, LyricFox, Phouka, Sperran, Star, Steve, Tana

Site Administrator:
Randall