Longing to Return to a Former Faith

[Lokabrenna]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

[Jack]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

What parts of being Wiccan do you miss?

When I let my ADF membership lapse, I was admitting to myself that academia/recon paganism is just not what I need to be doing. I made a conscious choice to focus more on my experiences, my intuition and my UPG.

(and I have to say, posts like that 10 Signs of a Fake Geek Girl - I mean Lokean - and that attitude in general among Norse recons is a not inconsiderable amount of the reason I stopped. I felt like I had to choose between Research All the Things, which is bad for me, and being lumped in with Research None Of the Things. Guess where I threw in my lot?)

There's no reason you can't stick with the things that work for you and change up the ones that don't.

[Kate]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

 
Well, are there elements of the drama that you can cut out, without necessarily needing to go back? Or another group you could go to? I don't know what the exact case is, so I could be completely off the mark

[Ivy]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

There is no reason you can't go back to being a solitary, eclectic Wiccan. As a solitary you do not have to cast a circle if it felt silly to you . Nor do you have to read certain books, follow certain ideals, etc. Being eclectic means you take the things that resonate & hold meaning to you and toss those that don't. It is after-all your path, and you only have to answer to yourself.

 However, fortunately, many Wiccans no longer believe the "my religion is older than dirt and billions of us were burnt at the stake" theories. If you Google Wicca for the rest of us you will find some great articles from a non fluffy bunny Wiccan. And there are many out there that you can meet in person if you look hard enough (if that is what you want.)

The good thing is you are growing in your beliefs and can now see that at one point you believed some naive things (we've all done that). As you grow spiritually a lot of your beliefs will change. You don't have to stay where your at now if it doesn't make you happy. From your post it sounds like Wicca is calling back to you. Perhaps you should give it another go, this time on your terms, doing what feels right to you. Just my 2 cents.

[Lokabrenna]

(and I have to say, posts like that 10 Signs of a Fake Geek Girl - I mean Lokean - and that attitude in general among Norse recons is a not inconsiderable amount of the reason I stopped.

 
*dies laughing*

Well, are there elements of the drama that you can cut out, without necessarily needing to go back? Or another group you could go to? I don't know what the exact case is, so I could be completely off the mark

To be honest, I like the occasional debate and giving an opinion on the current hot topic du jour, so I think I've kind of made my own bed in that case.

There is no reason you can't go back to being a solitary, eclectic Wiccan. As a solitary you do not have to cast a circle if it felt silly to you . Nor do you have to read certain books, follow certain ideals, etc. Being eclectic means you take the things that resonate & hold meaning to you and toss those that don't. It is after-all your path, and you only have to answer to yourself.

 However, fortunately, many Wiccans no longer believe the "my religion is older than dirt and billions of us were burnt at the stake" theories. If you Google Wicca for the rest of us you will find some great articles from a non fluffy bunny Wiccan. And there are many out there that you can meet in person if you look hard enough (if that is what you want.)

The good thing is you are growing in your beliefs and can now see that at one point you believed some naive things (we've all done that). As you grow spiritually a lot of your beliefs will change. You don't have to stay where your at now if it doesn't make you happy. From your post it sounds like Wicca is calling back to you. Perhaps you should give it another go, this time on your terms, doing what feels right to you. Just my 2 cents.

I think I'm at the point where I look back but couldn't go back knowing that I probably wouldn't be that happy. Sometimes I miss being Catholic too, when the holidays I celebrate get recognition and my neighbours are all Catholic and all of that privilege being Christian gets you, but I just can't go back to it. We're irreconcilable, and not only on a theological level.

[Kate]

To be honest, I like the occasional debate and giving an opinion on the current hot topic du jour, so I think I've kind of made my own bed in that case.

 
Fair enough

As an odd aside, I think you might live in my city, or nearby, as I think you added me to the local Facebook group the other day

[Jack]

*dies laughing*

It's practically the same argument, right down to "omg I bet you don't even read the comicslore"

[EclecticWheel]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

 
You could always go back to being a solitary but within a framework other than Wicca.  If Wicca still speaks to you in some way, I don't see why you couldn't just drop what seems silly to you (like casting a circle) but keep the aspects that are good for you.  If there are any gaps in your practice from reevaluating your Wiccan or eclectic practice, I'm sure that would take care of itself in time, it will evolve.

If you wanted, you could maintain a solitary practice but attend neo-pagan events from time to time if you want connections to others in the community besides the Internet.

In my own path, my approach is to worship with my Episcopal community but to also maintain a solitary practice that has emerged in my spirituality at home or with one or two close friends.  If you had access to a neo-pagan group you were comfortable with, you could take a similar approach -- worship with some neo-pagan friends when its available and maintain a solitary practice at home.

Of course, I don't know you or what your path entails so take it with a grain of salt.  I hope you find a good solution.

[yennork]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

The thing is, I know I can't go back. I felt silly casting circles, and I have some serious issues with all the "Burning Times" and other bad history in many Wicca 101 (particularly books by a certain publisher) books. There are just too many things I don't agree with, and if I encountered my fluffy solitary eclectic Wiccan self now, I'd just be like "OMGS was I really this naive?"

I can't say I'm not happy with where I am now, it's just...*sighs*

Of course you can't go back - but you can go forward. All the things you've learned and studied and experienced since you opened your first Wicca 101-book - use them to find your path. Be a solitary eclectic neo-pagan instead of wiccan, for a while at least?

[MadZealot]

Be a solitary eclectic neo-pagan instead of wiccan, for a while at least?

Yep.  Heck, you can be solitary and wiccish withOUT the bad history.

[Materialist]

Lately I've been thinking "Gee, everything would just be so much simpler if I could go back to being a solitary eclectic Wiccan again." It just seems like there wasn't as much drama, my list of recommended reading wasn't such a strain on my wallet.

What drama are you referring to? My recommended reading list consists of inter-library loans and a stack of notebooks, so I rarely have problems getting a book I want, if only temporarily.

[RandallS]

You could always go back to being a solitary but within a framework other than Wicca.

I think this is something to at least consider. Along with something like inter-library loans for some of the more expensive books you'd like to read.