Introducing Myself

[Grace]

Hello All,

I've finally joined The Cauldron after some time of lurking and thought it was only proper to introduce myself to you all.

I've recently returned to my Pagan beliefs after many years of... conscious absence, I suppose. I would like to clarify that at the moment I identify as an Eclectic Pagan as I am still finding my feet again in terms of defining my beliefs and I'm wary of putting too much of a specific name on it as of yet as I don't want to be misleading. I realise the term 'Eclectic Pagan' is about as broad of an umbrella term as I could get, but for now it's what I am comfortable with.

I discovered Paganism and specifically Wicca, in my teens and instantly felt a connection. I learned and practiced for a number of years. I felt very fulfilled and spiritually connected during this time. I gained most of my knowledge through the few books on the subject that I was able to access, and some online resources (I had dial up internet at the time so it was slow going!) I began to fall away from my practice as life got busier, and unfortunately I experienced a lot of negativity towards my beliefs especially from my family. I suppose in my naivety I was eager to share this wonderful connection I had found and perhaps I didn't quite understand that others would not be as open to it or feel the same about it as I did. I guess I internalized this negativity and began to feel ashamed of my beliefs and practices, and so began to move away from it as the years went on in order to "fit in".

However, while I may have put my spirituality to the back of my mind on a conscious level, I feel it was always present with me regardless, and I realise now looking back that I was still unconsciously drawn to many aspects, even if I wasn't active in it. Then recently due to illness I have been unable to work, and that allowed time for some soul-searching. I began to feel a strong pull back towards my beliefs and felt ready to fully embrace them again. The result has been an overwhelming sense of coming home. I have realised that through my hobbies I have actually remained close to my spirituality, be it through my arts and crafts or my love of researching folklore but now I am ready to seek and practice my beliefs again on a conscious level and I consider myself a student once again, eager to learn and observe to find what fits and works with my life.

One thing I have found since my 'coming home', is that once the information I could gain was limited, but now it is overwhelmingly vast! I have lost whole days to 'falling down the rabbit hole' as I call it, researching and learning about different paths in an effort to re-find my own. I have to give a shout out to Jenett on here, who has the amazing website: http://gleewood.org/seeking/ as it has helped me so much to navigate useful resources and to just generally learn. Also, browsing the topics and discussions on this forum has been so helpful in answering some of my questions and I hope to become an active participant.

I'm not really sure if it's necessary to define my beliefs here, but perhaps it might be useful to outline them in the hopes that some of you might be able to point me in a more specific direction with my research?

- I believe above all in the Elements and the Universe. Respect and love of nature is very important to me and I find I draw strength from being in nature. I love to have representations of the elements in my home and I'm in the process of rebuilding my altar.

- I do believe in the Triple Goddess and feel a connection to her, although how this ties in to the rest of my beliefs is still unclear to me. In my research so far, I have found Pantheism to be the closest thing to what I identify with.

- I believe in the Wiccan Rede and the Rule of Three, both in a sense of 'what you put out into the universe will come back to you' and also in the way that it impacts me on three different personal levels.

Put simply, my beliefs make me want to strive to be a better person. To consciously incorporate them into my everyday life to feed my soul, enhance my appreciation for nature, and enrich my daily life and hopefully the lives of the people around me simply by me striving to live in a way that aligns with my beliefs.

One thing I am wary of is the fact that there are SO many vastly different beliefs out there, and honestly, I'm deathly afraid of offending anyone by perhaps referring to something incorrectly or using the wrong terminology. I respect every single persons unique beliefs and have no wish to impose my own beliefs on anyone, I am simply eager to learn, so I would appreciate anyone calling me out if I am incorrect about my understanding of something or my terminology.

In terms of the research I have been doing recently I have been looking into Druidry and have been drawn to Awen, the Celtic symbol for creative inspiration. The Celtic symbols and beliefs attract me as I am Irish and still live in Ireland, although I have also lived in Wales and feel an extreme spiritual connection to Wales. I often describe it as my spiritual home-place. But again, because there is SUCH a vast amount of information out there, I find I get pulled in all different directions and I'm finding it difficult to ascribe to any one path. I know it's not necessary to fit myself into an already formed path, I guess I'm just looking for some guidance in the right direction.

In terms of reading, unfortunately my local library and bookshops are sadly lacking in a lot of the recommended reading I have found listed here and elsewhere. I have checked Robert Graves' "The White Goddess" out of the library, but to be honest, it's intimidating! I found myself lost just reading the introduction! I did find Thomas Moore's "The Re-Enchantment of Everyday Life" in a local bookshop yesterday and I am currently devouring it. It doesn't come down on the side of any one belief system, but I find it resonates with me in regards to bringing my beliefs into everyday life and I find it does have a Pagan leaning to it so I'm really enjoying it, I just wish I knew how to find more like it.

In terms of finding like-minded individuals in my area, although I am lucky to live in a large city, I am kind of lost as to how to go about finding a group I could incorporate with. I'm not necessarily looking to join a coven or moot or anything yet, as I am still working on finding my own path, but it would be nice to be able to talk in person with people about it all. Unfortunately it looks like any groups that have been in my area have disbanded or do not advertise, or perhaps I'm just not looking in the right places.

Anyway, I realize I have prattled on for much longer than I intended to (I'm a storyteller so this tends to happen!) and I appreciate anyone that has stuck with me and has read this fully. I'm a little starved of people to express this side of me to in real life so it looks like it's all come pouring out here, apologies!

I would appreciate anyone's comments, insights, knowledge or direction and I'm really looking forward to becoming an active member of this community.

G.

[Jenett]

Unfortunately it looks like any groups that have been in my area have disbanded or do not advertise, or perhaps I'm just not looking in the right places.

Welcome! And I'm always so glad when the Seeking site is helpful to people. Thanks for making my day! (Especially for picking today for it, as I'm dealing with a frustrating thing at work.)

On finding groups, it's often worth checking out what you can that isn't absolutely the wrong thing, because people will make suggestions for other options. Moots generally are set up exactly for 'hang out and talk' even if there's a talk on a particular topic as part of it (if you're not sure, emailing whatever the organisational contact is often works well.)

If there are any esoteric or New Age type stores or bookstores that cover relevant topics, those can also be good places to ask. Looking for any public Pagan events can also help, as they may link to other groups or resources.

Sometimes it's just a really slow process, unfortunately.

(Some of the rest of your questions might make good threads elsewhere so I'm going to leave that for now, but please, do keep asking things!)

[Hariti]

I've finally joined The Cauldron after some time of lurking and thought it was only proper to introduce myself to you all.

Welcome! It's always good to see a new face around here!

[Grace]

Welcome! And I'm always so glad when the Seeking site is helpful to people. Thanks for making my day! (Especially for picking today for it, as I'm dealing with a frustrating thing at work.)

Thank you for your welcome, and I'm glad my comment helped your day 

If there are any esoteric or New Age type stores or bookstores that cover relevant topics, those can also be good places to ask. Looking for any public Pagan events can also help, as they may link to other groups or resources.

I have tried a few New Age shops for reading material but I didn't actually think to look or ask for groups or societies, that's a great idea, thanks!

(Some of the rest of your questions might make good threads elsewhere so I'm going to leave that for now, but please, do keep asking things!)

I'm still trying to find my way around the board and where is best to post certain questions so once I get the hang of it I'll certainly be asking more!

Thanks for your reply!

[Grace]

Welcome! It's always good to see a new face around here!

Thanks so much for your welcome 

[LadyBug]

Anyway, I realize I have prattled on for much longer than I intended to (I'm a storyteller so this tends to happen!) and I appreciate anyone that has stuck with me and has read this fully. I'm a little starved of people to express this side of me to in real life so it looks like it's all come pouring out here, apologies!

I would appreciate anyone's comments, insights, knowledge or direction and I'm really looking forward to becoming an active member of this community.

Welcome! Your intro story sounds SUPER familiar, it's pretty similar to mine anyways. Thank you for making the big step from lurker to active member, and the even bigger step from "I'm not sure" to "Lets DO THIS". TC makes that step a little easier, there are lots of great people here to ask questions of and seek support from. This is a great place to come to learn things, to feel less alone in the never ending search, and to hear different perspectives on topics that have you stuck

I'm not really sure if it's necessary to define my beliefs here, but perhaps it might be useful to outline them in the hopes that some of you might be able to point me in a more specific direction with my research?

Knowing your baseline is always helpful when it comes to getting answers. You could probably tuck that information into your profile Bio so its easily accessed by anyone needing to refresh what they know about you while they are helping you find answers. Its easier to find your profile than it is to drudge up your intro post.

TC needs a curious storyteller right now. There are lots of old topics to read both here and in the Old Forum (here https://www.ecauldron.net/forum/index.php?action=forum), which means lots of stuff to pull into new threads to ask for clarification. Don't be shy. Wander, post, discuss, learn and welcome to the TC Family! Take it from me, you'll find yourself coming back here again and again and again 

[Grace]

Welcome! Your intro story sounds SUPER familiar, it's pretty similar to mine anyways. Thank you for making the big step from lurker to active member, and the even bigger step from "I'm not sure" to "Lets DO THIS". TC makes that step a little easier, there are lots of great people here to ask questions of and seek support from. This is a great place to come to learn things, to feel less alone in the never ending search, and to hear different perspectives on topics that have you stuck  

Thank you so much for your warm welcome  This seems like a lovely, helpful, community and I'm very glad to have found it!

Knowing your baseline is always helpful when it comes to getting answers. You could probably tuck that information into your profile Bio so its easily accessed by anyone needing to refresh what they know about you while they are helping you find answers. Its easier to find your profile than it is to drudge up your intro post.

That's an excellent idea. I was kind of unsure what to put in my bio so I didn't put anything at all, but it makes sense to give an outline there so people know where I'm coming from when I post, thanks for the suggestion!

Don't be shy. Wander, post, discuss, learn and welcome to the TC Family!

I have a few days left before I go back to work, and honestly, the majority of my time has been spent on this forum reading different threads! I apologize if it seems like I'm spamming with new topics or posting in old threads, I'm just excited to have a community of people to learn from as I am feeling a little lost and like I'm right back at the beginning so I'm kind of eager for information! 

[Jenett]

I have a few days left before I go back to work, and honestly, the majority of my time has been spent on this forum reading different threads! I apologize if it seems like I'm spamming with new topics or posting in old threads, I'm just excited to have a community of people to learn from as I am feeling a little lost and like I'm right back at the beginning so I'm kind of eager for information! 

Questions are an awesome thing! One of the reasons I've stuck around here for so long is that other people asking questions helps me think about things in new or different ways, and I love that.

(We do usually suggest one topic per thread to start, even if there's a couple of related questions - it makes it easier for other people to keep track and respond.)

[Voren]

Hello All,

I've finally joined The Cauldron after some time of lurking and thought it was only proper to introduce myself to you all.

I've recently returned to my Pagan beliefs after many years of... conscious absence, I suppose. I would like to clarify that at the moment I identify as an Eclectic Pagan as I am still finding my feet again in terms of defining my beliefs and I'm wary of putting too much of a specific name on it as of yet as I don't want to be misleading. I realise the term 'Eclectic Pagan' is about as broad of an umbrella term as I could get, but for now it's what I am comfortable with.

I discovered Paganism and specifically Wicca, in my teens and instantly felt a connection. I learned and practiced for a number of years. I felt very fulfilled and spiritually connected during this time. I gained most of my knowledge through the few books on the subject that I was able to access, and some online resources (I had dial up internet at the time so it was slow going!) I began to fall away from my practice as life got busier, and unfortunately I experienced a lot of negativity towards my beliefs especially from my family. I suppose in my naivety I was eager to share this wonderful connection I had found and perhaps I didn't quite understand that others would not be as open to it or feel the same about it as I did. I guess I internalized this negativity and began to feel ashamed of my beliefs and practices, and so began to move away from it as the years went on in order to "fit in".

However, while I may have put my spirituality to the back of my mind on a conscious level, I feel it was always present with me regardless, and I realise now looking back that I was still unconsciously drawn to many aspects, even if I wasn't active in it. Then recently due to illness I have been unable to work, and that allowed time for some soul-searching. I began to feel a strong pull back towards my beliefs and felt ready to fully embrace them again. The result has been an overwhelming sense of coming home. I have realised that through my hobbies I have actually remained close to my spirituality, be it through my arts and crafts or my love of researching folklore but now I am ready to seek and practice my beliefs again on a conscious level and I consider myself a student once again, eager to learn and observe to find what fits and works with my life.

One thing I have found since my 'coming home', is that once the information I could gain was limited, but now it is overwhelmingly vast! I have lost whole days to 'falling down the rabbit hole' as I call it, researching and learning about different paths in an effort to re-find my own. I have to give a shout out to Jenett on here, who has the amazing website: http://gleewood.org/seeking/ as it has helped me so much to navigate useful resources and to just generally learn. Also, browsing the topics and discussions on this forum has been so helpful in answering some of my questions and I hope to become an active participant.

I'm not really sure if it's necessary to define my beliefs here, but perhaps it might be useful to outline them in the hopes that some of you might be able to point me in a more specific direction with my research?

- I believe above all in the Elements and the Universe. Respect and love of nature is very important to me and I find I draw strength from being in nature. I love to have representations of the elements in my home and I'm in the process of rebuilding my altar.

- I do believe in the Triple Goddess and feel a connection to her, although how this ties in to the rest of my beliefs is still unclear to me. In my research so far, I have found Pantheism to be the closest thing to what I identify with.

- I believe in the Wiccan Rede and the Rule of Three, both in a sense of 'what you put out into the universe will come back to you' and also in the way that it impacts me on three different personal levels.

Put simply, my beliefs make me want to strive to be a better person. To consciously incorporate them into my everyday life to feed my soul, enhance my appreciation for nature, and enrich my daily life and hopefully the lives of the people around me simply by me striving to live in a way that aligns with my beliefs.

One thing I am wary of is the fact that there are SO many vastly different beliefs out there, and honestly, I'm deathly afraid of offending anyone by perhaps referring to something incorrectly or using the wrong terminology. I respect every single persons unique beliefs and have no wish to impose my own beliefs on anyone, I am simply eager to learn, so I would appreciate anyone calling me out if I am incorrect about my understanding of something or my terminology.

In terms of the research I have been doing recently I have been looking into Druidry and have been drawn to Awen, the Celtic symbol for creative inspiration. The Celtic symbols and beliefs attract me as I am Irish and still live in Ireland, although I have also lived in Wales and feel an extreme spiritual connection to Wales. I often describe it as my spiritual home-place. But again, because there is SUCH a vast amount of information out there, I find I get pulled in all different directions and I'm finding it difficult to ascribe to any one path. I know it's not necessary to fit myself into an already formed path, I guess I'm just looking for some guidance in the right direction.

In terms of reading, unfortunately my local library and bookshops are sadly lacking in a lot of the recommended reading I have found listed here and elsewhere. I have checked Robert Graves' "The White Goddess" out of the library, but to be honest, it's intimidating! I found myself lost just reading the introduction! I did find Thomas Moore's "The Re-Enchantment of Everyday Life" in a local bookshop yesterday and I am currently devouring it. It doesn't come down on the side of any one belief system, but I find it resonates with me in regards to bringing my beliefs into everyday life and I find it does have a Pagan leaning to it so I'm really enjoying it, I just wish I knew how to find more like it.

In terms of finding like-minded individuals in my area, although I am lucky to live in a large city, I am kind of lost as to how to go about finding a group I could incorporate with. I'm not necessarily looking to join a coven or moot or anything yet, as I am still working on finding my own path, but it would be nice to be able to talk in person with people about it all. Unfortunately it looks like any groups that have been in my area have disbanded or do not advertise, or perhaps I'm just not looking in the right places.

Anyway, I realize I have prattled on for much longer than I intended to (I'm a storyteller so this tends to happen!) and I appreciate anyone that has stuck with me and has read this fully. I'm a little starved of people to express this side of me to in real life so it looks like it's all come pouring out here, apologies!

I would appreciate anyone's comments, insights, knowledge or direction and I'm really looking forward to becoming an active member of this community.

G.

Hello and welcome

[Grace]

(We do usually suggest one topic per thread to start, even if there's a couple of related questions - it makes it easier for other people to keep track and respond.)

Thanks Jenett, I'll keep that in mind! 

[Grace]

Hello and welcome

Thank you!