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Author Topic: Hello, sorry for the long post  (Read 740 times)

Cheshireheir

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Hello, sorry for the long post
« on: March 24, 2016, 04:09:27 pm »
Hello all,

I'm not exactly new to paganism but I am new to talking to others about it. I have never been part of a forum or really talked to anyone about what my belief system is. I grew up roman catholic and went to catholic school, though the entire time i felt that this wasn't right for me. I studied pretty much every religion i could. Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism, Atheism. I kept sticking close to Paganism and Wicca. I couldn't get into Wicca though was very interested in the Occult.

When I was younger I had a gift of being able to see some spirits and talk through spirit writing, though the older I became the more it mentally effected me and i stopped believing, so I stopped seeing. I started receiving signs during my occult days from the Goddess Lilith. I worshiped her only and have attempted to look into and worship other Gods and Deities, though nothing seems to fit. It doesn't feel right. I stopped worshiping when i became pregnant with my first child and was so caught up i truly forgot.

After the birth of my second child, a daughter, I looked at her and immediately thought of my Goddess.  My daughter looked just like a little owl. I thought Athena was calling to me, I saw owls everywhere. I was a mother and needed the guidance. I started praying to her in hopes of becoming a stronger and better mother. After a while I found that it didn't seem right. I was getting these signs every day but i wasn't feeling that connection, then i realized.. It was Lilith, she had sent me messages and i worshiped another. I promised her i would never make that mistake again, and the feeling of wholeness has come back.

i know to most they view Lilith as a demon who kills children and steals mens sperm. And she is if you believe the Judeo-christian Bastardization of her. She is truly ancient and was once viewed as a fertility Goddess. I feel its my duty to show others that she isn't what men have made her into. She is a strong, independent,  amazing Woman.

Sorry for the paragraph rant, but every time i have ever told anyone of my beliefs I get told Im an idiot, or too dark, or the antichrist.

If there are any others who worship Lilith please point me in their direction. I would love to learn more and talk with like minded people.
« Last Edit: March 24, 2016, 10:39:54 pm by SunflowerP »

SunflowerP

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #1 on: March 24, 2016, 10:43:30 pm »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188841
Hello all


Hi, Cheshireheir, welcome to The Cauldron!

Quote
Sorry for the paragraph rant....

 
A Reminder:
We don't mind long posts, or even rants, here, but to avoid having a hard-to-read  wall-o'-text, hitting "enter" twice every few lines adds some white  space and makes it easier to follow - I've edited yours to add those  breaks, but it's a really good habit to get into yourself.

They don't have to be the "proper" place for paragraph breaks (we're  interested in readability more than technicalities), or a complete  change of thought - some thoughts take a lot of lines and need to be  broken up into sub-thoughts - as long as they're there.

This isn't a formal warning, just a reminder.  No  reply is necessary,  but if you have questions or need clarification,  please feel free to  contact a member of staff privately.

Thanks!
Sunflower
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I'm the AntiFa genderqueer commie eclectic wiccan Mod your alt-right bros warned you about.
I do so have a life; I just live part of it online!
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Faemon

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #2 on: March 25, 2016, 07:01:55 am »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188841
When I was younger I had a gift of being able to see some spirits and talk through spirit writing, though the older I became the more it mentally effected me and i stopped believing, so I stopped seeing. I started receiving signs during my occult days from the Goddess Lilith. I worshiped her only and have attempted to look into and worship other Gods and Deities, though nothing seems to fit. It doesn't feel right. I stopped worshiping when i became pregnant with my first child and was so caught up i truly forgot.

After the birth of my second child, a daughter, I looked at her and immediately thought of my Goddess.  My daughter looked just like a little owl. I thought Athena was calling to me, I saw owls everywhere. I was a mother and needed the guidance. I started praying to her in hopes of becoming a stronger and better mother. After a while I found that it didn't seem right. I was getting these signs every day but i wasn't feeling that connection, then i realized.. It was Lilith, she had sent me messages and i worshiped another. I promised her i would never make that mistake again, and the feeling of wholeness has come back.

 
Welcome! Ehh, intuition has a tendency to not be obvious, so I'd advise against being too harsh on yourself. I sort of started off with the otherworldly planes and energyworking models of psychism, although I'd look to mythology (any mythology I could access) to articulate something weird going on there that wasn't in the existing vocabulary of corroborated experience. For a while to me, Lilith is what I called the wind over there on the other side. Like, I would do a meditation to initiate an out-of-body experience, and sure enough I would be moving around the same room I meditated in except knowing that my physical body wasn't moving; and there would be great ceaseless gusts of wind just blasting through the walls, that of course wasn't physically present because that was physically impossible. I made a word history connection between Lilith and "wind" (from some citation needed, this was ages ago) so that's why it stuck.

If your idea of consciousness, agency, mythological integrity, personal experiences and relationship and practice is different than mine when it comes to Lilith, of course that's fine and great. I'd be interested to hear it, and that's what's great about forums I think, the differences tends to call for clearer definition and that loops back to helping personal stuff. :)
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Cheshireheir

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #3 on: March 25, 2016, 12:57:04 pm »
Quote from: SunflowerP;188861
Hi, Cheshireheir, welcome to The Cauldron!


 
A Reminder:
We don't mind long posts, or even rants, here, but to avoid having a hard-to-read  wall-o'-text, hitting "enter" twice every few lines adds some white  space and makes it easier to follow - I've edited yours to add those  breaks, but it's a really good habit to get into yourself.

They don't have to be the "proper" place for paragraph breaks (we're  interested in readability more than technicalities), or a complete  change of thought - some thoughts take a lot of lines and need to be  broken up into sub-thoughts - as long as they're there.

This isn't a formal warning, just a reminder.  No  reply is necessary,  but if you have questions or need clarification,  please feel free to  contact a member of staff privately.

Thanks!
Sunflower
TC Forum Staff

Thank you I will. I definitely understand the wall of letters thing. Ill make sure to break up my rants if i happen to have anymore!

Quote from: Faemon;188871

And I think i understand what you mean by wind, If I'm understanding it correctly. I've always  gotten this, feeling i guess you would call it. Where everything around me will change, but at the same time nothing is different. Almost as if my eyes aren't seeing what is different its my consciousness or brain are recognizing that something else is there.

Its not a presence or being that is visible, its an all over almost pulsating, where i can feel energy pass through all of my limbs.

I really haven't experienced any OBE, the above stated is probably the furthest into it I have felt. I haven't tried anything new in a while, and am definitely curious to how other interact or are impressed upon by her.
« Last Edit: March 26, 2016, 06:20:36 pm by SunflowerP »

HarpingHawke

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #4 on: March 25, 2016, 04:22:45 pm »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188841


 
Welcome to The Cauldron! :)
"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self." - Hemingway

Voren

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #5 on: March 25, 2016, 08:45:15 pm »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188841
Hello all,

I'm not exactly new to paganism but I am new to talking to others about it. I have never been part of a forum or really talked to anyone about what my belief system is. I grew up roman catholic and went to catholic school, though the entire time i felt that this wasn't right for me. I studied pretty much every religion i could. Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism, Atheism. I kept sticking close to Paganism and Wicca. I couldn't get into Wicca though was very interested in the Occult.

When I was younger I had a gift of being able to see some spirits and talk through spirit writing, though the older I became the more it mentally effected me and i stopped believing, so I stopped seeing. I started receiving signs during my occult days from the Goddess Lilith. I worshiped her only and have attempted to look into and worship other Gods and Deities, though nothing seems to fit. It doesn't feel right. I stopped worshiping when i became pregnant with my first child and was so caught up i truly forgot.

After the birth of my second child, a daughter, I looked at her and immediately thought of my Goddess.  My daughter looked just like a little owl. I thought Athena was calling to me, I saw owls everywhere. I was a mother and needed the guidance. I started praying to her in hopes of becoming a stronger and better mother. After a while I found that it didn't seem right. I was getting these signs every day but i wasn't feeling that connection, then i realized.. It was Lilith, she had sent me messages and i worshiped another. I promised her i would never make that mistake again, and the feeling of wholeness has come back.

i know to most they view Lilith as a demon who kills children and steals mens sperm. And she is if you believe the Judeo-christian Bastardization of her. She is truly ancient and was once viewed as a fertility Goddess. I feel its my duty to show others that she isn't what men have made her into. She is a strong, independent,  amazing Woman.

Sorry for the paragraph rant, but every time i have ever told anyone of my beliefs I get told Im an idiot, or too dark, or the antichrist.

If there are any others who worship Lilith please point me in their direction. I would love to learn more and talk with like minded people.

 
Hello and welcome! I like Lilith, she has always been kind to me and I consider her a friend :) Nice to see someone who is fond of her as well.
-Voren
(aka Sou\'r-Ghi\'den)

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Morag

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2016, 09:18:25 pm »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188841



 
Welcome to TC!
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SunflowerP

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Re: Hello, sorry for the long post
« Reply #7 on: March 26, 2016, 06:28:16 pm »
Quote from: Cheshireheir;188888


 
A Reminder:
Hi again, Cheshireheir,

Just a quick note:  Please remember to quote each post you're replying to.  It makes the discussion  easier to follow, and it's required by  our  rules.

The thing that's most important is the trackback provided in the quote code (I've added the code/trackback in this case) - that's the bit inside each set of square brackets. The easiest way to make sure that all of you replies have trackbacks to the post they're a reply to, is to do each reply as a separate post - unlike many forums, we don't mind people making more than one post in a row, and in fact prefer it!

This isn't a formal warning, just a reminder.  No  reply is necessary, but if you have questions or need clarification,  please feel free to contact a member of staff privately.

Thanks!
Sunflower
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I'm the AntiFa genderqueer commie eclectic wiccan Mod your alt-right bros warned you about.
I do so have a life; I just live part of it online!
“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.” - Oscar Wilde
"Nobody's good at anything until they practice." - Brina (Yewberry)
My much-neglected blog "If You Ain't Makin' Waves, You Ain't Kickin' Hard Enough"

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