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Author Topic: You know you're a pagan when  (Read 21052 times)

Sage

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You know you're a pagan when
« on: July 05, 2011, 06:50:04 pm »
THE place for "You might be a Pagan if..." jokes. Share ones you find or make up yourself. I'll go first.

You might be a Pagan if you watch The Prince of Egypt and find yourself sympathizing with those poor Egyptians. (Okay, maybe not so funny, but definitely true in my life. ;D)
Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.

-Canticle of Trials 1:10

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Friday Otherfaith Blogging: last updated 2/27
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SatSekhem

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #1 on: July 05, 2011, 07:33:34 pm »
Quote from: Sage;1630
THE place for "You might be a Pagan if..." jokes. Share ones you find or make up yourself. I'll go first.

 
You know you're a pagan if when asked if you believe in God, you ask, "Which one?"
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In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. - Douglas Adams

Sage

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #2 on: July 05, 2011, 07:34:43 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;1666
You know you're a pagan if when asked if you believe in God, you ask, "Which one?"

 
Ha! The other week the doctor, upon learning I wanted to be a minister, asked what I worshiped. My response: "...a lot."
Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.

-Canticle of Trials 1:10

Sage and Starshine (my spiritual blog): last updated 2/25.
Friday Otherfaith Blogging: last updated 2/27
Join the Emboatening Crew over on Kiva! Emboatening the boatless since Opet 2013.

SatSekhem

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #3 on: July 05, 2011, 07:42:06 pm »
Quote from: Sage;1667
Ha! The other week the doctor, upon learning I wanted to be a minister, asked what I worshiped. My response: "...a lot."

 
You know you're a pagan when there are more jars of weird-smelling plants than there are cereal boxes.
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In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. - Douglas Adams

Erinnightwalker

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #4 on: July 05, 2011, 07:53:17 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;1668
You know you're a pagan when there are more jars of weird-smelling plants than there are cereal boxes.

 
You know you're a pagan when all your "knick-knacks" have names, and get sprayed with (good) alcohol once a week.
The Nightwalking Hedgehog
I make ceramic art and am currently taking commissions. Have dream altar ware you\'ve always wanted, or a statue for a deity or spirit that you could never find? PM or email me and I\'ll see what I can do ;)

SatSekhem

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2011, 04:39:33 pm »
Quote from: Erinnightwalker;1684
You know you're a pagan when all your "knick-knacks" have names, and get sprayed with (good) alcohol once a week.

 
You know you're a pagan when your candles outnumber your light bulbs.
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In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. - Douglas Adams

Wrynn

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #6 on: July 06, 2011, 04:49:16 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;2081
You know your a Pagan when...



You know your a Pagan when you tell your christian pastor that there is more than one path to god and he asks you to leave.
)o( Blessed be,
Wrynn Aethelraed

Sage

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #7 on: July 06, 2011, 04:51:39 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;2081
You know you're a pagan when your candles outnumber your light bulbs.

 
*whistles and hides candle collection innocently*

You know you're a Pagan when your electricity goes out and you don't even notice because of said candles?
Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.

-Canticle of Trials 1:10

Sage and Starshine (my spiritual blog): last updated 2/25.
Friday Otherfaith Blogging: last updated 2/27
Join the Emboatening Crew over on Kiva! Emboatening the boatless since Opet 2013.

SatSekhem

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #8 on: July 06, 2011, 05:02:42 pm »
Quote from: Sage;2097
*whistles and hides candle collection innocently*

You know you're a Pagan when your electricity goes out and you don't even notice because of said candles?

 
You know you're a pagan when you have an entire spice cabinet but don't cook.
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In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. - Douglas Adams

AlisonLeighLilly

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #9 on: July 06, 2011, 05:37:54 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;2115
You know you're a pagan when you have an entire spice cabinet but don't cook.

 
You know you're a Pagan when the Mormons don't bother stopping by your house anymore because last time they were there you tried explaining to them how you worship Odin and Apollo.

Sage

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #10 on: July 06, 2011, 05:38:44 pm »
Quote from: AlisonLeighLilly;2141
You know you're a Pagan when the Mormons don't bother stopping by your house anymore because last time they were there you tried explaining to them how you worship Odin and Apollo.

 
...dude. I have GOT to try that.
Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.

-Canticle of Trials 1:10

Sage and Starshine (my spiritual blog): last updated 2/25.
Friday Otherfaith Blogging: last updated 2/27
Join the Emboatening Crew over on Kiva! Emboatening the boatless since Opet 2013.

AlisonLeighLilly

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #11 on: July 06, 2011, 05:39:37 pm »
Quote from: AlisonLeighLilly;2141
You know you're a Pagan when the Mormons don't bother stopping by your house anymore because last time they were there you tried explaining to them how you worship Odin and Apollo.

 
Also: You know you're a Pagan when you kinda wish the Mormons would come back, because you're afraid they thought you were just f**king with them. (No, really, we're actually very nice people!)

Melamphoros

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #12 on: July 06, 2011, 05:58:51 pm »
Quote from: AlisonLeighLilly;2143
Also: You know you're a Pagan when you kinda wish the Mormons would come back, because you're afraid they thought you were just f**king with them. (No, really, we're actually very nice people!)

 
WAIT!

You weren't kidding?  Oh man, I wonder if it would work on the JWs?


Jesus saves, Allah forgives, Cthulhu thinks you will make a great sandwich.
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AlisonLeighLilly

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #13 on: July 06, 2011, 07:03:52 pm »
Quote from: Melamphoros;2151
WAIT!

You weren't kidding?  Oh man, I wonder if it would work on the JWs?

 
Nope, totally serious. :) What's funny is that my boss and my partner's boss are both Mormons (and they're both quite friendly people), so we have lots of secondhand insight into Mormonism. ;)

--Ali

SatSekhem

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Re: You know you're a pagan when...
« Reply #14 on: July 06, 2011, 07:15:11 pm »
Quote from: AlisonLeighLilly;2141
You know you're a Pagan when the Mormons don't bother stopping by your house anymore because last time they were there you tried explaining to them how you worship Odin and Apollo.

 
You know you're a pagan when in Religion 101 you were disappointed that YOUR gods weren't covered.
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