Gods that help with confidence and self-esteem?

[Geroth]

A little bit of background information: I'm a guy in my mid-20s. I'm very very very shy and my confidence and self-esteem is shot to pieces and it's something I have struggled with my entire life. I have decided this is something I really need to work on. My father made me feel worthless from the time I was very young and I was teased a lot in high school and as a result I retreated inward. Due to my shyness, poor self esteem and confidence, I've never had a romantic relationship or been intimate with anybody whatsoever and I would like to experience that. Why has romance never happened for me?: 1) I am too shy and insecure to approach 2) I was convinced no one would want a fat, ugly loser like me; and 3) I was scared of being vulnerable. Not only that, I find the fact I haven't even been kissed at my age really embarrassing for me.

My question is, are there gods that are good with/or can help with developing a persons confidence and self esteem? Ones that I could easily reach out to? I have interests in the Germanic pantheon and I have also worked with the Virgin Mary in the past but I'm willing to look into any pantheon.

Can anybody offer any advice?

[Redfaery]

Can anybody offer any advice?

D'awww....You make me want to hug you. :ashamed:

I'd suggest looking into deities of love, because you not only are looking for a romance, it sounds like you need to love yourself. So maybe start with Venus and Aphrodite, or Lakshmi?

[Geroth]

D'awww....You make me want to hug you. :ashamed:

I'd suggest looking into deities of love, because you not only are looking for a romance, it sounds like you need to love yourself. So maybe start with Venus and Aphrodite, or Lakshmi?

I was thinking about Venus or Aphrodite and other love deities but I've never approached them before and I don't know much about them apart from very general things. I didn't think they would work on confidence and self-esteem. Lakshmi? I would never have even thought about her. I didn't actually know she was connected to those particular areas. I guess maybe I would have tended to associated her more with wealth and prosperity.

[Redfaery]

I was thinking about Venus or Aphrodite and other love deities but I've never approached them before and I don't know much about them apart from very general things. I didn't think they would work on confidence and self-esteem. Lakshmi? I would never have even thought about her. I didn't actually know she was connected to those particular areas. I guess maybe I would have tended to associated her more with wealth and prosperity.

Well, Lakshmi's not a "love goddess" in the sense that Venus and Aphrodite are, but she's definitely associated with happiness, especially in relationships. I get this feeling from her (and this is just my UPG) that she's a very bubbly, outgoing lady with this infectious self-confidence. And she's associated with luck. She's pretty awesome...even though she drives Sarasvati CRAZY.

[Geroth]

I get this feeling from her (and this is just my UPG) that she's a very bubbly, outgoing lady with this infectious self-confidence.

Haha! Sounds very much like a deity I should be looking at then.

[Faemon]

1) I am too shy and insecure to approach 2) I was convinced no one would want a fat, ugly loser like me; and 3) I was scared of being vulnerable. Not only that, I find the fact I haven't even been kissed at my age really embarrassing for me.

My question is, are there gods that are good with/or can help with developing a persons confidence and self esteem?

In my opinion, it depends on what you define as a god, how you interact with that god, and how you believe the interaction even works to apply to this. For example, if you asked after a figure to admire, one with an established tradition of routine devotionals that you can learn and do, then Apollo could be one. But if you have this literal golden god traipsing about your headspace, He who's never known what it feels like to be called worthless and ugly, and you don't have an instinct for becoming Apollonian...then the connection might become counterproductive. What works for some people might not work for others.

So...the method I recommend would actually be to vibe out a simple, "On this issue, help wanted" and see what answers. When it came to my own self-esteem issues, it was a lot of mundane things, but a solar deity thwapped me too and I wasn't ready to accept this presence (although I believed this heralded a natural maturation of my anxiety into something that passes for confidence), followed by Manannan mac Lir for healing and honesty, and then, years later, Loki for actual confidence.

But my main guide has been this no-name, no-mythology presence the closest I can probably get to identifying is the Jungian Animus.

More mundanely, at least you have a way to separate the bad stuff so that you know it's not innate and it can be something you can deal with. You know that it's a confidence issue, and a self-esteem issue. How about identifying the values of conventional attractiveness, accomplishment, and romantic inexperience? Why do those mean what they mean, why do they matter as much as they do? It's common enough to be a societal phenomenon, but what in your experience has shaped it, and how to reframe those particles of your life story so that they don't become a muddle of harmful conditioning?

[Hieronymus]

Haha! Sounds very much like a deity I should be looking at then.

 
I know some people who have had improvement with that issue from a meditative approach, some with frequent rituals to improve self-confidence and others with a spiritual side like you mention. I think Redfaery hit the nail on the head, once you love yourself, things will fall into place.
If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me. i've dealt with similar issues a long time back, and it's a hard one to find your way out of.

[Jainarayan]

Haha! Sounds very much like a deity I should be looking at then.

 
Yes, Lakshmi. Saraswati bestows wisdom, not only book learning, but the widom to see things as they are. Also Freyja from the Norse pantheon; Ganesha from the Hindu pantheon removes obstacles; Týr and Thor from the Norse pantheon, for courage; Durga from the Hindu pantheon for courage, Krishna (a god himself) told Arjuna (a famous warrior) to pray to Mother Durga before a battle. I think any deity who represents courage is the one for self-esteem and self-confidence.

[Gaudior]

Yes, Lakshmi. Saraswati bestows wisdom, not only book learning, but the widom to see things as they are. Also Freyja from the Norse pantheon; Ganesha from the Hindu pantheon removes obstacles; Týr and Thor from the Norse pantheon, for courage; Durga from the Hindu pantheon for courage, Krishna (a god himself) told Arjuna (a famous warrior) to pray to Mother Durga before a battle. I think any deity who represents courage is the one for self-esteem and self-confidence.

 


Ganesha, Lakshmi and Sarasvati are often worshiped together for extra help (especially around Divali ).

[Geroth]

I know some people who have had improvement with that issue from a meditative approach, some with frequent rituals to improve self-confidence and others with a spiritual side like you mention. I think Redfaery hit the nail on the head, once you love yourself, things will fall into place.

I think that self-love is the issue as well. I have tried meditation. The only thing I got out of meditating was that I felt good and my thinking was clearer but my issues themselves did not dissipate. I've read 'self-help' books but it's not helped either which is why I have resorted to the spiritual option. I just need to find the right deities to work with that will help me overcome it.

[Jainarayan]

Ganesha, Lakshmi and Sarasvati are often worshiped together for extra help (especially around Divali ).

 
Yep, representing all three of their main attributes... good fortune (not only monetarily), knowledge, and removal obstacles in one-stop shopping. I have small murtis of the three in that grouping.

[Ghost235]

Yes, Lakshmi. Saraswati bestows wisdom, not only book learning, but the widom to see things as they are. Also Freyja from the Norse pantheon; Ganesha from the Hindu pantheon removes obstacles; Týr and Thor from the Norse pantheon, for courage; Durga from the Hindu pantheon for courage, Krishna (a god himself) told Arjuna (a famous warrior) to pray to Mother Durga before a battle. I think any deity who represents courage is the one for self-esteem and self-confidence.

 
All good suggestions.  In particular I'd say Freyja.  One thing to keep in mind with her is that though she is effective and can be gentle she can also be a bit intense.  

In my UPG(take with a head sized chunk of salt), she seems to favor self-esteem repairs through self improvement(do all the things) and recognition(have situations where you are forced to see the results of self improvement).  After she's done with you, you will definitely lift, bro.  And run(maybe get warmed up with this).  And most likely be lead into a ton of introspection.  But, if you stick with it you might end up with a romantic connection.  Or you'll be a hyper developed Jedi like figure.  Either way, the ride will be fun.

[Sefiru]

I think that self-love is the issue as well. I have tried meditation. The only thing I got out of meditating was that I felt good and my thinking was clearer but my issues themselves did not dissipate. I've read 'self-help' books but it's not helped either which is why I have resorted to the spiritual option. I just need to find the right deities to work with that will help me overcome it.

 
I have yet to encounter a self-help book that was actually helpful.

That said, what type of meditation have you tried? Because there is 'loving-kindness meditation' which specifically addresses this sort of issue.

[Geroth]

what type of meditation have you tried? Because there is 'loving-kindness meditation' which specifically addresses this sort of issue.

I have never actually heard of 'loving kindness meditation'. Thank you for the recommendation, I will definitely have to check it out.

[Fier]

I was thinking about Venus or Aphrodite and other love deities but I've never approached them before and I don't know much about them apart from very general things. I didn't think they would work on confidence and self-esteem.

 
Aphrodite is definitely a goddess of self love and self esteem! For me that kind of work has manifested in "take care of yourself, because you are worth it" vibes.