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Author Topic: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...  (Read 4757 times)

Aine Rayne

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What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« on: April 17, 2012, 10:35:49 pm »
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.
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Sharysa

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2012, 12:50:27 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
The ritual/worship doesn't need to be THAT long; it can just be a sentence or two or a ten-minute meditation on them. As for offerings, you can offer the first bite/spoonful of your meal to the gods and they'll be fine with it.
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earth_dragon

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2012, 02:43:20 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
I often say silent prayers before going to bed. Or you could try keeping a specific candle you like, even one that's scented, and light it only when you want to make a small ritual or offering. If anyone asks and you don't want to tell, just say you wanted the candle lit. Something else I do, and I know this is a little bizarre but... I often just doodle Brighid crosses and pentacles on scraps or paper or whatever. It's just sort of my way of showing that I'm thinking of and connecting to my path no matter what else I may be doing.

Teigue

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2012, 04:38:14 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

I find that various quick acknowledgements through the day can go a long way.

A lighting of a candle in the morning with a prayer to Brigid; a few minutes at lunch time with a symbolic offering of part of my meal; a quiet thanks when I get home; a final candle prayer before bed.  All these take but a few minutes and reinforce my connections and get me feeling like I'm honoring her in all aspects of my life

As Sharysa and Dragon have said; it doesn't have to be long and drawn out, short spaces scattered through the day are just as effective to me; in some ways more effective; than a long, formal ritual such as I use to do way-back when.
« Last Edit: April 18, 2012, 04:38:50 am by Teigue »

Vale

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2012, 07:58:41 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
The bathroom is one place where privacy is almost guaranteed ;)

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2012, 10:00:32 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
You can offer your meal.  You can offer a simple glass of water before drinking it (If the gods/spirits you're offering to don't mind you sharing in their offering).  You can say a simple silent prayer.  

It doesn't have to be elaborate, just effective.
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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2012, 11:02:47 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
My problem is not being able to have an altar. Seriously, there is no room for one anywhere in this house - a perk of living with a packrat grandmother. So the one I have, all tucked away, is on a need-to-use basis. On the occasions I cannot offer through the altar, I do what has been suggested here in this thread. The extra effort to work around issues like this requires dedication, which is always a plus. :)

SatSekhem

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2012, 11:33:05 am »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
You are looking at the queen of not enough privacy, space, or time. Well, okay. Not the time part, but definitely the first two.

As for privacy, chances are you're going to have to say "fuck it," if you really want to do the obeisance and full-on ritual thing. I have a hard time getting down on my knees to pay obeisance to Sekhmet in front of the Hubby. Does it stop me? More often than not, I'm afraid to say it, but it does. When I do end up doing it in front of him, I think of the days when I'll have a house to myself where I won't have to suffer odd looks from people when I get down on my knees and raise my arms in praise of my goddess. It does help, though, that my dogs think that it's the best thing when "Mommy" gets down on the floor to their level. (I have two Dachshunds.) That can be annoying, but whatever.

And I'm rambling. Back to topic.

So, when it comes to privacy, it's one of those things where you have to do wait until you have the house to yourself or wait until others are out of the room/at work/doing something somewhere else.

As for space. Ha. I live in an apartment that is about half the full-sized apartment I had when I first got together with the Hubby. To say that we are smooshed in is an understatement. There are two tiny bedrooms, a after-thought living room, and the kitchen/dining area, which takes up more than half of the apartment. I decided that this "not enough space" stuff was utter BS and made the space. This means that my shrine for Sekhmet, Hetharu, and Legba is the first thing you see when you walk in. Do I get questions from people? Sure. Do I care? Not in the slightest. It's not only out and about so that I can see my gods, but it's also there as a reminder that if I want something badly enough, I can make it happen.

I also have reappropriated a portion of my entertainment center as a shrine to the Blessed Dead/Papa Ghede/Baron as well as have a small $20 end table in my bedroom for Erzili Freda. It takes up about a foot, square, of space. I've long since stopped walking into it in the middle of the night. :)

So, in effect. What to do with no space? Either make it, or end up suffering because of it. I don't say that to sound like a bitch. For the longest time, I let my "lack of space" effect how/when I did anything for my gods and it really got on my nerves. It got to the point where I just couldn't handle not having a closer connection anymore. So, I made the space. (To start, I had my gods on my night table.)

As far as time, do a little something just before bed. This seems to be the most common.
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Aine Rayne

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What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2012, 01:12:41 pm »
Quote from: SatSekhem;50720
You are looking at the queen of not enough privacy, space, or time. Well, okay. Not the time part, but definitely the first two.

As for privacy, chances are you're going to have to say "fuck it," if you really want to do the obeisance and full-on ritual thing. I have a hard time getting down on my knees to pay obeisance to Sekhmet in front of the Hubby. Does it stop me? More often than not, I'm afraid to say it, but it does. When I do end up doing it in front of him, I think of the days when I'll have a house to myself where I won't have to suffer odd looks from people when I get down on my knees and raise my arms in praise of my goddess. It does help, though, that my dogs think that it's the best thing when "Mommy" gets down on the floor to their level. (I have two Dachshunds.) That can be annoying, but whatever.
It's more that i don't like asking for the space from my sister and don't want to get into any discussion with my grandmother. It's just not comfortable. My sister is open to the idea and reads my blog, but I'm very used to sharing space with her and don't want to invite foreign energies into our space while she's here. That and my nephew gets upset when one of the family ghosts makes too many faces at him, I can't imagine his reaction to a deity. I wish I was with my boyfriend, since he's interested in more of a "oh what's oddball Rae doing today?" I can just explain it, though that's likely to end in hilarious frustration (you should've heard the response i got from trying to explain offerings XD). Oh and I lock my big ass puppy out of my room lol although the one time i did obeisance downstairs he actually didn't bother me.

Quote
And I'm rambling. Back to topic.
So? I ramble lol I'm pretty sure we have a large population of ramblers on TC XD

Quote
So, when it comes to privacy, it's one of those things where you have to do wait until you have the house to yourself or wait until others are out of the room/at work/doing something somewhere else.
I try, usually works lol

Quote
As for space. Ha. I live in an apartment that is about half the full-sized apartment I had when I first got together with the Hubby. To say that we are smooshed in is an understatement. There are two tiny bedrooms, a after-thought living room, and the kitchen/dining area, which takes up more than half of the apartment. I decided that this "not enough space" stuff was utter BS and made the space. This means that my shrine for Sekhmet, Hetharu, and Legba is the first thing you see when you walk in. Do I get questions from people? Sure. Do I care? Not in the slightest. It's not only out and about so that I can see my gods, but it's also there as a reminder that if I want something badly enough, I can make it happen.

I also have reappropriated a portion of my entertainment center as a shrine to the Blessed Dead/Papa Ghede/Baron as well as have a small $20 end table in my bedroom for Erzili Freda. It takes up about a foot, square, of space. I've long since stopped walking into it in the middle of the night. :)

So, in effect. What to do with no space? Either make it, or end up suffering because of it. I don't say that to sound like a bitch. For the longest time, I let my "lack of space" effect how/when I did anything for my gods and it really got on my nerves. It got to the point where I just couldn't handle not having a closer connection anymore. So, I made the space. (To start, I had my gods on my night table.)

As far as time, do a little something just before bed. This seems to be the most common.

I'm not looking forward to apartment hunting anymore XD but at least BF and I are decent space organizers lol I actually recently acquired some candlesticks and a bowl. I'm not sure how to utilize the bowl yet since it'll essentially be a shared offering bowl, but I'm sure I'll think of something. Just before bed doesn't work for me for a simple reason: I'm an owl and go to bed at ridiculous times already. I think my grandmother wouldn't appreciate late night candle burning. She already thinks I'm doing magic or something. And since my sister's here and i generally do ritual in our room (southward window :D) it would disturb her and the baby.
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Aine Rayne

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What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2012, 01:16:58 pm »
Quote from: Vale;50697
The bathroom is one place where privacy is almost guaranteed ;)

Lol maybe in your house, but in a house full of related girls where the only males are a baby and a dog, we don't even close the door unless we're trying to keep shower heat in XD
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Vale

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2012, 04:51:14 pm »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50742
Lol maybe in your house, but in a house full of related girls where the only males are a baby and a dog, we don't even close the door unless we're trying to keep shower heat in XD

 
Well I did say almost   ;)

In the past I've gone and sat in the car  to escape  - sometimes just in the driveway, sometimes driven elsewhere to a car park (if nowhere better is available).

Aine Rayne

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2012, 05:09:18 pm »
Quote from: Vale;50783
Well I did say almost   ;)

In the past I've gone and sat in the car  to escape  - sometimes just in the driveway, sometimes driven elsewhere to a car park (if nowhere better is available).

 
Proud utilizer of public transportation and city slicker to boot :D also, lazy non-dresser who will brush her hair just to ward off fire catching from candles XD I totally do ritual in my pj's lol However, I do like all your suggestions and will take them ^_^ thanks everyone, but feel free to add more lol Obviously I'm not the only one with this problem lol
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caelestisraven

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #12 on: April 18, 2012, 05:31:09 pm »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50663
...But you really want to do ritual/worship or offerings? I could use some suggestions.

 
You make the time/space. Well it isn't easy but it can be done. It is the same thing always said on the fitness/health forums I am on...people always say they don't have time. But you just have to make it if it is something important to you.

When I first started my path I was still living at home & I had a huge family and because of financial issues we even had more family there, & my grandmother. There was like 11 people, living there, not even counting those who hung out there so much they practically lived there too lol Having any space or privacy seemed surely impossible most times lol. And yeah doing anything in front of my lovely family who was both curious and may laugh at me was rough.

I would pray in the shower. I would take walks and/or to the local park if I could. Most of the time I would wait until every else went to bed if I needed to do a ritual. It wasn't always great for sleep lol But once a week or a few times a month is worth it to me. you could also get up earlier then everyone else if they are night owls. You don't really need to chant or pray out loud or even use candles or anything IMO. Intent, & yourself can make do until other things are possible.

Like someone else said it can be tough for me to do things around my husband. Luckily he is a night owl so doing stuff in the morning works great for me. I am getting better about it too. My cats are another story. I have three cats and they are like OMG you are sitting on the floor that must mean it is kitty love time. One of my cats feels that whenever I meditate he has to be in my lap. Which wouldn't be so bad if he didn't feel the need to also kiss me and roll around as well or have his brother come and try to play with him :56: if I lock them out of any room I am in they sit outside the door crying and reaching under it and banging the door lol

As for space you can buy like pretty little trunks/boxes and let it hold your supplies and just then set it up as needed. Or have a small shelf with just a few things on it. Right now because of some space issues I am having to use a small shelf & I wish it was different but it works lol Alot of people make altars that just look like normal decor and no one would notice it was an altar even.
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SatSekhem

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #13 on: April 18, 2012, 05:39:09 pm »
Quote from: Aine Rayne;50740
It's more that i don't like asking for the space from my sister and don't want to get into any discussion with my grandmother. It's just not comfortable. My sister is open to the idea and reads my blog, but I'm very used to sharing space with her and don't want to invite foreign energies into our space while she's here. That and my nephew gets upset when one of the family ghosts makes too many faces at him, I can't imagine his reaction to a deity. I wish I was with my boyfriend, since he's interested in more of a "oh what's oddball Rae doing today?" I can just explain it, though that's likely to end in hilarious frustration (you should've heard the response i got from trying to explain offerings XD). Oh and I lock my big ass puppy out of my room lol although the one time i did obeisance downstairs he actually didn't bother me.


Ah. So now I'm getting a better picture of your living situation. So, if I got this right, you are living with family at present (one of whom is open-ish and the other is so-so not) but you still want to do something for your gods, hm? Let me think about it some.

 
Quote from: Aine Rayne
I'm not looking forward to apartment hunting anymore XD


It totally sucks. :)

Quote from: Aine Rayne
I actually recently acquired some candlesticks and a bowl. I'm not sure how to utilize the bowl yet since it'll essentially be a shared offering bowl, but I'm sure I'll think of something.

 
Well, you can place it as a big ole bowl on an altar space for "passing through" deities or for "everyone". When I have my house set up (so never--just kidding) the way that I actually want it, I'm planning on having a table or credenza or something for household deities. This is where Hetharu and Bes will "live" when I have my own house and the room, to boot. If you end up with enough space for something similar, you can use the candlesticks as representations on a household altar and the bowl as the "everyone's getting water" offering.
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Aine Rayne

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Re: What do you do when you don't have privacy/space/time...
« Reply #14 on: April 18, 2012, 07:22:06 pm »
Quote from: caelestisraven;50788

As for space you can buy like pretty little trunks/boxes and let it hold your supplies and just then set it up as needed. Or have a small shelf with just a few things on it. Right now because of some space issues I am having to use a small shelf & I wish it was different but it works lol Alot of people make altars that just look like normal decor and no one would notice it was an altar even.

 
I have a box full of candles of various colors lol I recently acquired a box for my stones and tarot cards that I rarely use. I like them, but I don't really need them, and they're pretty :D most of my stones are still at my boyfriend's campus, and they'll probably stay with him til we get our own place. I have a small table by my window, which is great because it's a southward facing window and I've put the candlesticks (and candles) and my bowl on it, along with Anpu and Wepwawet's cups (they're plastic cups with their names on them X3). And a jar of water both for emergency fire extinguishing purposes and a representation of the Nile. It's mainly for emergency fire extinguishing though XD I used to have plants up there, but I have potted new ones yet so it's currently free space. I actually got to do a small little prayer/ritual thingie. Sister reads blog= no awkward questions :3 She actually fussed at me this afternoon for being asleep in the morning because she had stayed upstairs with my nephew for the purpose of giving me space to be with my Jackals XD They got peanut chews today :D
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