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Author Topic: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?  (Read 6108 times)

Jack

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Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« on: September 23, 2013, 10:34:15 pm »
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?
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stephyjh

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #1 on: September 23, 2013, 10:47:48 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

 
People do that with ADHD, too. Either it's not a real thing and it's wildly over-diagnosed, or they're sure they've got it too, just because they fidget. I've found that "Really? How old were you when you were diagnosed?" tends to shut the people up who are helping themselves to a diagnosis that they aren't taking seriously.

(As a side note, I will say that the pop-culture "super organized" version of OCD looks like a lot more fun than the real thing that I've seen from, you know, actual humans.)
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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #2 on: September 23, 2013, 10:55:49 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

 
As long as you know for sure that they are not I would say it just like you said it there.

NO YOU ARE NOT. STOP IT.
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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #3 on: September 23, 2013, 11:07:56 pm »
Quote from: Fireof9;122840
As long as you know for sure that they are not I would say it just like you said it there.

NO YOU ARE NOT. STOP IT.

 
I'd go with Stephy's option maybe ask about what medication they've tried then if they keep pushing it Firof9's or give them real life symptoms (not necessarily your own because NO) or depending on your relationship and the usefulness of the butthead in question just like, bawl 'em out. *may've done that once*

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Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2013, 02:29:39 am »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

I can relate a bit. I either get people who think they have Asperger's too because they're introverts, or (more commonly) I get some attempt at denial that I have it, like "I'd never have guessed" or "You don't seem like you have it". Both are wildly difficult to refute. I talk about diagnosis and symptoms (mostly the latter) to get people to stop. It's highly annoying, though. It's like, I'm busy and tired enough dealing with this thing - do I have to deal with your 'me too'/your efforts to make me 'prove it' *too*? Meh.
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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #5 on: September 24, 2013, 07:39:54 am »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?


I think "No you are not. Stop it." is the best way to go.

I can totally relate with you on this since I've had people think my Bipolar Disorder is either something I've convinced myself I have (never mind that I've been diagnosed by a professional) or something that should have me institutionalized.

Ignoramuses think because they took some kind of online test or read an article on Psychology Today or Yahoo Health they have all of the knowledge available with regard to mental illness and emotional disorders.
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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #6 on: September 24, 2013, 08:02:26 am »
Quote from: Jack;122835

Anybody have a script for that?

 
As you're probably aware, there's a related, more minor condition known as Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, which, while often more serious than "all my DVDs are alphabetized" does not have the same impact on daily life.

When people tell me they're OCD over things like that, I often ask whether they mean OCPD and use it as a teaching/slight shaming moment. ("When was the last time you rushed home to check the oven evn though you hadn't used it in two days?")

If I'm short on spoons, I say, pretty snarkily, "It sounds like you mean CDO. It's the exact same as OCD, but all the letters are in alphabetical order."

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #7 on: September 24, 2013, 08:10:46 am »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

 
I find "everyone's got /one thing/ they're OCD about, but imagine doing that with everything" tends to be a bit of a shut-up.

Because yes, most people have a completely irrational *twitch* about one thing.  Which is nothing like having it about *everything*.  But it might give a basis of real comparison - and really, shutting the hell up about it is more likely to come from understanding.

Charis

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #8 on: September 24, 2013, 06:50:03 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?


Someone close to me does this all the time, and it drives me nuts.  Telling them they don't have it causes ... uh... tension.  With some people, it's more than they just think they have it; some people seem to want to have it for whatever reason.

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Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #9 on: September 24, 2013, 09:26:19 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?


I'd hand them a copy of the DSM IV. :p

Though it might be better to just copy the pages about OCD. If you give them the whole thing they might find other things with which to diagnose themselves. Lol.
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Revenant

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #10 on: September 26, 2013, 03:51:44 pm »
Quote from: Charis;122966
Someone close to me does this all the time, and it drives me nuts.  Telling them they don't have it causes ... uh... tension.  With some people, it's more than they just think they have it; some people seem to want to have it for whatever reason.


Which makes absolutely no sense to me because anyone that has it, really has it, would do just about anything to not have it.
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Schuyler

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #11 on: September 26, 2013, 08:10:03 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

 
I get this as well, but with my bipolar.

"Oh, totally. I'm bipolar too--- I am always PMSing!"

Honestly, I don't even respond. I go with just a long, blank stare (which coworkers, friends, and family have all told me is terrifying to behold). That usually succeeds in making them feel like an idiot.

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #12 on: September 26, 2013, 08:38:05 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.


 
I find it rather rude to claim one knows more about a person's health/mental state than they do, so I think Stephy's response is great. It shuts up those who really are full of it but leaves a line of conversation open for those who do indeed feel afflicted.

Riothamus12

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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #13 on: September 29, 2013, 08:17:48 pm »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?

 
Unfortunately I cannot think of it. Most situations generally will guarantee someones toe will get stepped on. People who are thoroughly convinced will argue with you about it. The best way I can think of is just to gently point out other factors that could play into their misconception. Of course it's also possible that some such individuals may actually have a very mild form.
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Re: Is there a good way to say "no you don't have it"?
« Reply #14 on: September 30, 2013, 08:06:16 am »
Quote from: Jack;122835
So I don't think it's a secret that I'm OCD. Fortunately I don't get much in the way of "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop counting ceiling tiles" but what I do get, all the time, is "oh yes I am also OCD that's why I'm good at reviewing files" or "oh yes I am also OCD my DVDs are all in order" or something.

And I just want to be like NO YOU ARE NOT STOP IT.

Anybody have a script for that?


Oh god, that's exhausting. The one I go to for hypochondria (I have other stuff going on, but that's the one people are most likely to respond to in the way they do with OCD) is "yeah, sometimes it's [x thing they mention], but usually it's [y thing that actually impedes my life]". Obviously using this tactic depends on the person/my willingness to share, but I find that as long as I keep my voice upbeat and conversational they get the picture that this isn't something to take lightly. If the situation doesn't call for that kind of thing, or if I just don't have the energy, I go with "yeah, I wish it was the usual variety instead of the clinical one" and then bean-dip the subject.

If it's someone I care about, or someone who seems to be in some kind of obvious distress, I'll go a little deeper into explaining why that's not cool, or poking at what they do think is wrong with them. In my experience a lot of people who go YEAH I'VE GOT THAT TOO do have things going wrong in their head or life, but they don't know how to express that/don't know what's going on/think that by attaching themselves to your problem they might get some attention for their own problems. Obviously that takes a lot of energy, but if someone I'm going to see again it's sometimes easier in the long run.
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