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Author Topic: Fork theory  (Read 552 times)

PerditaPickle

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Fork theory
« on: November 12, 2019, 04:21:33 am »
I just learned about this theory:

http://jenrose.com/fork-theory/

I think I could find this quite useful,  alongside spoon theory - anyone else?

(In a nutshell, where spoons are the finite amount of energy one has, forks are trials & tribulations and everyone has limits to how many forks they can cope with.)
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Kylara

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Re: Fork theory
« Reply #1 on: November 12, 2019, 03:07:47 pm »
I just learned about this theory:

http://jenrose.com/fork-theory/

I think I could find this quite useful,  alongside spoon theory - anyone else?

(In a nutshell, where spoons are the finite amount of energy one has, forks are trials & tribulations and everyone has limits to how many forks they can cope with.)

I was so journaling about this the other day.  I saw the fork theory post (less extensive than this one, it was just the bit explaining fork theory), and thought it was brilliant.  I ended up trying to figure out things for "stuff you do that builds you up and possibly could give you spoons"...but my version was a bit of a stretch and not nearly as nice as some of the ideas in this article (I still love the cup/saucer analogy, that if you keep trying to 'fill' or give to other people from your cup, you run dry, but if you fill your cup first, with self-care, then you can give freely from your overflow in the saucer).  I like their version of knives too!

I also thought the bit at the end, talking about who can and can't use these was really potent.  I have seen a lot of people starting to use spoons (and spell-slot, I also love the spell-slot version that is gaining more popularity with gamers) in conversation. 

I don't have huge, everyday issues.  But I am learning to accept (and admit) that I have small issues that build up.  I have a ton of forks in me!  They may be those little bitty plastic ones that you use to serve fancy cheese on, but there are so many of them...I pretty much broke down the other night, playing a board game with hubby and son, and hubby kept asking if I hated the game, and I was trying to explain that it wasn't the game, I liked the game, but I was so over-forked that little upsets in the game (it was a competitive game, so we were all trying to kill each other) just made me extra cranky, but it really wasn't the game at all, it was everything else.

I've always felt weird, talking about how hard it is for me to do some things, because at the end of the day my lack of spoons isn't a physical thing.  For me, it's an emotional/mental thing.  I have no spoons to care or to think.  I can stubborn myself into physically going through the actions, I shower, I do the stuff that needs to be done, but I am emotionally/mentally drained.  I'm often done by dinner time.  I spend so much time trying to motivate myself and there just aren't any emotional spoons left.  I am a writer, and some days there are no mental spoons, there is no space in my head to think.
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Aisling

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Re: Fork theory
« Reply #2 on: November 12, 2019, 07:12:13 pm »
I just learned about this theory:

http://jenrose.com/fork-theory/

I think I could find this quite useful,  alongside spoon theory - anyone else?

(In a nutshell, where spoons are the finite amount of energy one has, forks are trials & tribulations and everyone has limits to how many forks they can cope with.)

So when things go pear-shaped, are we forked? 

Puns notwithstanding, I like the concept.  Have an entire set of cutlery as a framework for dealing with the energy sink that is chronic illness is really helpful.  It is so important to be able to recognize the things that take away spoons and when possible, having a plan to deal with those forks that we can. 

For me, the forks come in a couple of forms - things that stress my body physically and those that are mentally or emotionally taxing.  The worst of my forks do both at the same time and I have a one pitchfork limit at best before something has to give. 
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Uneryx

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Re: Fork theory
« Reply #3 on: November 13, 2019, 02:54:03 am »
I just learned about this theory:

http://jenrose.com/fork-theory/

I think I could find this quite useful,  alongside spoon theory - anyone else?

(In a nutshell, where spoons are the finite amount of energy one has, forks are trials & tribulations and everyone has limits to how many forks they can cope with.)

I experienced this full-stop yesterday

I was flying home from a visit with my mother, and things went sideways mid-afternoon. Her flight got cancelled due to airline shenanigans and chicanery, so that put a big stressful damper on our day. Then i had to stay at the airport for an inordinately long period of time. Then my plane was itty bitty and had some very narrow seats with very little leg room (I'm 5'4'' and usually have no complaints about leg room, but my knees were touching the seat in front of me). There was no wifi on board and very little in the way of food and drinks for a 6 hr flight.

And then on the descent I experienced something I'd never experienced before: rip-roaring PAINFUL barometric trauma in the sinuses above my eyes. It was like being stabbed in the forehead, and it came on very suddenly and very sharply. Nothing I did would soothe it except digging my fingers into my brows.

Finally got off the plane and almost had a meltdown trying to decide if I wanted to take a cab or the train home.

Stick a fork in me, I was done.

So yes, fork theory. Good theory.

Ashmire

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Re: Fork theory
« Reply #4 on: November 13, 2019, 09:35:31 am »

And then on the descent I experienced something I'd never experienced before: rip-roaring PAINFUL barometric trauma in the sinuses above my eyes. It was like being stabbed in the forehead, and it came on very suddenly and very sharply. Nothing I did would soothe it except digging my fingers into my brows.

First of all, off-topic huge sympathy for barometric pressure pain.   I am ridiculously prone to this and so many people don't even believe it exists! 

And yes, fork theory definitely works!  I've had so many times when just... about the third or fourth normally manageable irritation or change of plans in a row sends me into a full-blown anxiety attack.

SunflowerP

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Re: Fork theory
« Reply #5 on: November 15, 2019, 10:53:13 pm »
I just learned about this theory:

http://jenrose.com/fork-theory/

I think I could find this quite useful,  alongside spoon theory - anyone else?

(In a nutshell, where spoons are the finite amount of energy one has, forks are trials & tribulations and everyone has limits to how many forks they can cope with.)

I've used 'forks' in a few, shifting ways. First, to talk about being attention-different (i.e., I have ADHD, but I don't consider the 'official' terminology to be a good description of it - I don't have a deficit of attention; if anything, I have too much... but can't always apply it when and where it's required): 'forks' as a (weak) pun on 'focus'. More recently, following Darkhawk's usage, punning on 'fucks', as in, whether one has any left to give.

I note that the latter is not incompatible with the Fork Theory of the link.

I like the premise a lot - whether one calls it 'forks' or 'chop tongs' or 'lobster crackers', there's a Thing there, and it's well-worth calling it something, and the reasoning for choosing 'forks' makes sense - but because I've used the word in other ways in extended-flatware-metaphor, I think I need to sit with it a while before I can tell for certain how I feel about adopting it myself. I'm really glad you linked the article though!

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