Author Topic: Family: Is it Me or is it Something More? (Read 2976 times)

Caffeinated Autumn · « **on:** June 17, 2014, 02:01:46 am »

I've noticed when religion comes up between my parents (particularly my mother), that they seem to say things about me being a Wiccan and a witch.

My mom would talk about something and then say something along the lines of "God willl be the one to save me. Good luck with your trees and flowers saving your soul!"

Or something like "Doesn't matter what you say, you are Catholic. You've been baptized and confirmed. You are whatever religion the mother is."

The thing is I don't know if she's being funny or really means that. I also think that they might think it's a phase or something.

I figure I should talk to my parents about my beliefs properly so they know this is something I feel is right to me.

What would be some questions they might ask me if I were to explain myself?

Izzie414 · « **Reply #1 on:** October 19, 2014, 02:25:48 am »

Quote from: Caffeinated Autumn;150257

I've noticed when religion comes up between my parents (particularly my mother), that they seem to say things about me being a Wiccan and a witch.

My mom would talk about something and then say something along the lines of "God willl be the one to save me. Good luck with your trees and flowers saving your soul!"

Or something like "Doesn't matter what you say, you are Catholic. You've been baptized and confirmed. You are whatever religion the mother is."

The thing is I don't know if she's being funny or really means that. I also think that they might think it's a phase or something.

I figure I should talk to my parents about my beliefs properly so they know this is something I feel is right to me.

What would be some questions they might ask me if I were to explain myself?

They might simply ask why you changed. They may ask why you believe it's ok to practice witchcraft even though the church is against it.

What would happen if you didn't discuss it? I'm concerned you might make more strife for yourself. But then again, maybe your parents are more open minded somewhat.

Willow85 · « **Reply #2 on:** November 21, 2014, 05:18:11 am »

Quote from: Caffeinated Autumn;150257

I've noticed when religion comes up between my parents (particularly my mother), that they seem to say things about me being a Wiccan and a witch.

My mom would talk about something and then say something along the lines of "God willl be the one to save me. Good luck with your trees and flowers saving your soul!"

Or something like "Doesn't matter what you say, you are Catholic. You've been baptized and confirmed. You are whatever religion the mother is."

The thing is I don't know if she's being funny or really means that. I also think that they might think it's a phase or something.

I figure I should talk to my parents about my beliefs properly so they know this is something I feel is right to me.

What would be some questions they might ask me if I were to explain myself?

I've had a similar thing with my parents but in their case I know that it's mainly based on them feeling insecure about their own lives because I've made different choices. In my experience, not just with religion but with lots of aspects of life, particularly having kids, people feel very threatened when you don't follow the same path as them.
I personally don't think you should have to explain yourself but maybe sit them down and say 'these are my choices, you need to respect that'. Let them ask questions if they need to, that's understandable, but make it clear that those kinds of comments are not welcome. That's not a nice thing to say (or a particularly Christian thing to say) about God saving her, I can't imagine saying anything like that to my child. And you are whatever religion you choose, not your mother's, it doesn't work like that. It sounds like they think you are going through a phase so you need to handle it carefully and calmly to remind them you are old enough to make your own decisions.

Good luck.

Faemon · « **Reply #3 on:** November 21, 2014, 07:14:20 am »

Quote from: Caffeinated Autumn;150257

I figure I should talk to my parents about my beliefs properly so they know this is something I feel is right to me.

What would be some questions they might ask me if I were to explain myself?

You know your parents and yourself better than I ever could, of course. But, from what I can glean... they're never going to understand because they've already decided that you're wrong. It sounds to me like they can't allow themselves to be wrong, not about this, so when they're reminded that your spirituality is different, they'll feel like the world is falling apart (or at least has got some cracks in it) and blame you, or shame you, to tame you. A healthy boundary such as, "Well, I'm not, if you think about it, really hurting anyone" or "Aren't these just different paths to the same humane goal?" -- might not be an option that they would allow themselves to consider.