Author Topic: I just want to be left alone (Read 1960 times)

Eevee · « **on:** October 27, 2016, 09:42:14 am »

I don't know if this is a "prayable" request, but I just want an ex of mine to leave me alone.

He's been making threats to me against myself and someone I just started seeing, and generally harassing me and stalking me. The things he said literally make me want to vomit, and he was sending over 200 messages per hour and a half.
4 weeks ago (when it started), I changed my phone number, deactivated my FB, deleted my email account and literally made it seem like I disappeared off the face of the earth.

Using fake FB accounts, he has decided to keep harassing the guy I'm seeing (and getting his friends to do the same), he has contacted all my close friends and my mother in an attempt to spread a rumor which can cost my new partner's job and any other prospects.
He's went as far as to find my landline phone number to try and get one of my parents to answer.
Since he went to the length to search an online register for our landline number, I am certain he has my address, so I am staying with a friend temporarily.
No one has picked up the phone, replied to him or made any contact with him, but he is still continuing to try.

I've been to the police, there's nothing they can do nothing that isn't a slap on the wrist (which will only make matters worse). And the only way they will take a threat seriously is if I am literally being held up at knifepoint or along the likes (that's their exact words), and any online "tiffles" aren't enough for them to press any charges.
Naturally, I'm really pissed off at the cops.

He is still messaging my friends and calling the landline with numerous numbers (thank god for caller ID). I just need this to stop. It's been a whole month and I'm sick of hiding.
I'm psychologically f*cked up from this.

Can someone just pray that he gives up? Or do something. I dont know.
This is my last resort.

Jenett · « **Reply #1 on:** October 27, 2016, 10:13:17 am »

Quote from: Eevee;198149

This is my last resort.

I'm sorry you're going through that. Online harassment sucks.

The Crash Override Network has great info and resources (and also people who can talk to you and help you figure out if there's any other steps that might help - start by emailing their helpline.) Gavin de Becker's book The Gift of Fear is also a classic for dealing with stalking and harassment and what things help and don't help.

(The cops are, unfortunately, right, that them talking to him probably won't help and could make things a lot worse. Laws about online harassment have been really slow to catch up to reality in a lot of places.)

If you're comfortable doing magical work, this is a kind of situation where freezing spells *sometimes* work, but they can also sometimes aggravate things. (Normally these are done by taking things to identify the person - their name, a bit of their handwriting, a photo, etc.) and freezing it into a container with additional magical work to keep them away from you, freeze their actions against you, etc.

However, many people (including me) think that binding spells (and this is a form of binding) continue a connection against you and the person, and that may not be what you want at all, for any reason. (Also, in the case of an ice spell, you've got to maintain it in its frozen state, make room for it in your freezer, etc.)

In terms of him reaching out to other people, it can be good to get a message out to people he might try to contact, say "X has been harassing me and contacting everyone who might be in touch with me. Please don't tell him anything about where I am or what I'm doing or how to reach me." plus maybe the link to Crash Override for their own use and who to contact at the police that you've talked to. (Even if the police can't do anything, reporting it is still helpful for having a record, and if more people report it, it may help if he does cross a legal line even in a really small way.)

Eevee · « **Reply #2 on:** October 27, 2016, 10:34:38 am »

Quote from: Jenett;198151

I'm sorry you're going through that. Online harassment sucks

Thanks Jenett, I was recommended that "Gift of Fear" book, it might've even been you who recommended it! I made a similar post regarding different kind of help.

I not at all familiar with magic, which is probably a good thing, because I'd probably do something spiteful and stupid out of desperation.

And yeah, I've told everyone he could possibly contact about his behavior. My mum unplugs the house phone before she goes to work every morning so my dad wouldn't answer it (he's not one to give a rat's ass about my dilemmas).

He still find's a way though. Usually through fake FB profiles.

PerditaPickle · « **Reply #3 on:** October 28, 2016, 03:21:17 pm »

Quote from: Eevee;198149

Using fake FB accounts, he has decided to keep harassing the guy I'm seeing (and getting his friends to do the same), he has contacted all my close friends and my mother in an attempt to spread a rumor which can cost my new partner's job and any other prospects.

I will try and send some energy in your direction to support with this issue.

I also wanted to add, that a similar thing happened with FB with a friend of ours, and perpetrating this is a type of fraud (at least it is in England) - point this out to Facebook, and this should hopefully prompt them to remove the fake account/s (when nothing else apparently will; just reporting harassment doesn't appear to do it - it worked in the case of our friend, when nothing else did).