The Cauldron: A Pagan Forum

At the start of this year, after some rather life changing experiences, I made the conversion to Paganism. Specifically, Hellenism.

I have found my Matron. Have briefly talked to Her too, actually. I asked how I might serve her. She told me... in a rather vague way. Needless to say, she clearly wants me to figure stuff out on my own.

I've been trying to learn more of Her, but she is not a common Matron. Very few people seem to work with Her. Fewer chosen by Her to be one of her followers.

So I ask this to anyone here who might have an idea on how to tend to such a matter: What do yo do when your Patron/or Matron is not common? How do you learn of them when few others can be found to say what it is to work with and adore Them?

I've been trying to learn more of Her, but she is not a common Matron. Very few people seem to work with Her. Fewer chosen by Her to be one of her followers.

So I ask this to anyone here who might have an idea on how to tend to such a matter: What do yo do when your Patron/or Matron is not common? How do you learn of them when few others can be found to say what it is to work with and adore Them?

 
Also not Hellenic, but much in agreement with Jack. (Though, actually, you both have a substantial advantage on me!)

My primary personal deity relationship is - and has been for 14 years - with a deity whose name (as might be recorded anywhere) is still unknown to me. Over the years, I've become pretty sure she's one of the English (specifically not-Celtic) deities of water (of whom there are dozens, if not hundreds, many of whose names we don't know now).

It has at times been very frustrating to me to not be able to research and learn more (I'm a librarian! I want to research things I care about!)

On the other hand, it's been really good for me because I can't rely on the modes that are easy to me (either because they come more naturally, or because I've put a lot of time into learning those skills) - I had to learn other ways of sorting out the questions of this deity, and what I needed to know, versus what I want to know, but won't likely get.

So, first of all, since you do have a name, I'd suggest the obvious: look for really high quality sources that talk either about that specific deity (and if you are willing to share names, people may be able to give more specific ideas) like theoi.com (which will likely point you to a substantial amount of whatever extant material there is from historical sources), possibly exploring academic research sources (if you'd like help with this, I have access to a couple of relevant databases, or your local public library would be glad to help you, and I can help with how to ask them the most useful way). These are only part of it: historical sources don't always have much information, academics haven't always looked at the things you're most interested in, and so on, so the other part is figuring out how to form a practice.

On that side of things, you can look at general practices for Hellenic pantheon worship (even if you don't have or can't find specific prayers, you can, for example, look at the offerings and prayers and invocations to other deities, and write or adapt things: looking at deities who have similar interests or origins is usually a good start).

You can try the more general things that are usually taken reasonably well, and then over time, look at other methods (meditation, ritual experiences, divination, etc.) to expand what you're doing. (And it may be that a particular deity in question doesn't care about some of that: M'Lady doesn't care much about the form of my ritual, she does care a lot about me doing some specific tasks that line up with her goals and interests in the world.)

The last thing I want to say is that it can be frustrating, when everyone is going around talking about interactions with widely-known deities, to be over there going "argh, I can't talk about this without paragraphs of explanation", but at the same time, I like the fact that the range of deity experiences is that broad and varied, and I think it's good for people who honour and work with very well known deities to have people to talk to who don't do that.  

(Also, nothing in my practice prevents me being at rituals for other deities, though there are some kinds of ritual commitments I wouldn't make, etc. and I do work with a couple of better known deities in some specific settings at times.)

Also not Hellenic, but much in agreement with Jack. (Though, actually, you both have a substantial advantage on me!)

My primary personal deity relationship is - and has been for 14 years - with a deity whose name (as might be recorded anywhere) is still unknown to me. Over the years, I've become pretty sure she's one of the English (specifically not-Celtic) deities of water (of whom there are dozens, if not hundreds, many of whose names we don't know now).

It has at times been very frustrating to me to not be able to research and learn more (I'm a librarian! I want to research things I care about!)

On the other hand, it's been really good for me because I can't rely on the modes that are easy to me (either because they come more naturally, or because I've put a lot of time into learning those skills) - I had to learn other ways of sorting out the questions of this deity, and what I needed to know, versus what I want to know, but won't likely get.

So, first of all, since you do have a name, I'd suggest the obvious: look for really high quality sources that talk either about that specific deity (and if you are willing to share names, people may be able to give more specific ideas) like theoi.com (which will likely point you to a substantial amount of whatever extant material there is from historical sources), possibly exploring academic research sources (if you'd like help with this, I have access to a couple of relevant databases, or your local public library would be glad to help you, and I can help with how to ask them the most useful way). These are only part of it: historical sources don't always have much information, academics haven't always looked at the things you're most interested in, and so on, so the other part is figuring out how to form a practice.

On that side of things, you can look at general practices for Hellenic pantheon worship (even if you don't have or can't find specific prayers, you can, for example, look at the offerings and prayers and invocations to other deities, and write or adapt things: looking at deities who have similar interests or origins is usually a good start).

You can try the more general things that are usually taken reasonably well, and then over time, look at other methods (meditation, ritual experiences, divination, etc.) to expand what you're doing. (And it may be that a particular deity in question doesn't care about some of that: M'Lady doesn't care much about the form of my ritual, she does care a lot about me doing some specific tasks that line up with her goals and interests in the world.)

The last thing I want to say is that it can be frustrating, when everyone is going around talking about interactions with widely-known deities, to be over there going "argh, I can't talk about this without paragraphs of explanation", but at the same time, I like the fact that the range of deity experiences is that broad and varied, and I think it's good for people who honour and work with very well known deities to have people to talk to who don't do that.  

(Also, nothing in my practice prevents me being at rituals for other deities, though there are some kinds of ritual commitments I wouldn't make, etc. and I do work with a couple of better known deities in some specific settings at times.)

 
Thank you for your advice! It was quite insightful and I will take it to heart.

On your offer to lend me your databases, I would be very much interested! Just private message me so we can discuss this further.

Thank you!

... your Patron/or Matron....

 
A bit of a nitpick here, but quite a few folks find this nit irritating: patron deities are patrons whatever their sex/gender, because 'matron' isn't the feminine form; the two words have developed separately, and mean quite different things. I give more detail about that in this post.

Sunflower