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Author Topic: Advice on coping with hatred  (Read 4204 times)

Geckomamasita

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Advice on coping with hatred
« on: July 14, 2016, 03:57:50 pm »
I accidentally bought this book that is literally making me feel sick and I feel completely drained by it. It's this book on "Slavic faith" but its really just racist propaganda and oppression of women. I skimmed a few pages but it brought me to tears. This monster uses the names of the Slavic gods for his bigotry and makes up a ridiculous story that Slavic peoples are somehow better than all "others". This isn't the first time I've come across these people. I've had to filter through some of it to find information on Slavic paganism. I guess this book was the last straw for me. I cannot fathom how these people who have family that have been through such horrors in the name of hatred can turn around and put more hatred out there.

I'm going to burn the book if the burn bans have been lifted. I think that will help get this poison out of my head somewhat. I feel pathetic that words written on paper brought these emotions up but I cannot help it. Does anyone have any recommendation on how I can calm myself until I can burn this book? Or what to do?

CaitlinAnn

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2016, 04:22:44 pm »
Quote from: Geckomamasita;193898
I accidentally bought this book that is literally making me feel sick and I feel completely drained by it. It's this book on "Slavic faith" but its really just racist propaganda and oppression of women. I skimmed a few pages but it brought me to tears. This monster uses the names of the Slavic gods for his bigotry and makes up a ridiculous story that Slavic peoples are somehow better than all "others". This isn't the first time I've come across these people. I've had to filter through some of it to find information on Slavic paganism. I guess this book was the last straw for me. I cannot fathom how these people who have family that have been through such horrors in the name of hatred can turn around and put more hatred out there.

I'm going to burn the book if the burn bans have been lifted. I think that will help get this poison out of my head somewhat. I feel pathetic that words written on paper brought these emotions up but I cannot help it. Does anyone have any recommendation on how I can calm myself until I can burn this book? Or what to do?

 
I am a firm believer in picking my battles and choosing what I let affect me.  People will always hate and you can not control what other people say, no matter how vile their words. The Norse and Teutonic gods have also been widely used spread hate, oppression, and fear via white supremacists and separatist movements.

It really used to bother me a lot, but I realized expending my energy being upset by what hateful people do does nothing but hurt me.  For me personally, I would try to be proactive and educate others that the Slavic gods have nothing to do with racism or misogyny.  In my opinion, only though spreading love, tolerance, and education of your faith can you fight those who abuse it.

So, in short, let it go, breathe, and fight hate and ignorance with love and education.

Snake-Bitten

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #2 on: October 23, 2016, 01:31:49 pm »
Quote from: Geckomamasita;193898

I'm going to burn the book if the burn bans have been lifted. I think that will help get this poison out of my head somewhat. I feel pathetic that words written on paper brought these emotions up but I cannot help it. Does anyone have any recommendation on how I can calm myself until I can burn this book? Or what to do?

 

"Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."
These words have become somewhat of a mantra to me. In short, remember that you can't make anyone feel or believe anything. You can only control how you feel, and you are the only one who can protect yourself from your thoughts.

I believe the book burning is an excellent idea. Also, when I'm feeling something especially volatile, I write it down. I feel much lighter after I am done, and you could choose to burn that as well if you wish.

Eevee

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #3 on: October 26, 2016, 10:24:43 am »
Being 1st generation Australian with a Slovakian background, I was raised Slovak, first spoke Slovak, only ate Slovak food, only sang Slovak nursery rhymes, went to a Slovak church, didn't mingle with Australian kids until school.
I can safely say, East European culture is VERY oppressed.

I can see that in my father's behavior and every other Slovakian man I know. Women will always be beneath them, and women never see it as sexism or oppression either, and most automatically assume role as housewife or trophy wife.
There might be more feminist movements there now, but they're still very much backwards.

This conservatism runs rampant in East Europe and sadly has embedded itself in the culture, to a point where a book on paganism cannot be written without sexist and racist undertones.

However, in their defense, the way men and women treated each other back in the early days was SO different, so it might come as a shock to learn that during Easter for example, out of custom,  men poured buckets of cold water on women, then whipped them (lightly) and still received sweets from them. (practiced until recently enough for my parents to recount stories)

To many of the middle aged - senior generations, there is no such thing as sexism, no such thing as racism.

The oppression of Communism until 1989(I think) probably didn't help their mentality either. East Europe had all their extreme censoring crashing down in a day - giving birth to a new sex crazed, loud mouthed, intolerant society.

It's a different society with different standards, different concepts of right and wrong. Maybe keeping that in mind may help you calm down a bit.  

Quote from: Geckomamasita;193898
but its really just racist propaganda and oppression of women. I skimmed a few pages but it brought me to tears.
« Last Edit: October 26, 2016, 10:32:47 am by Eevee »
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Chatelaine

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #4 on: October 26, 2016, 06:31:55 pm »
Quote from: Geckomamasita;193898
Does anyone have any recommendation on how I can calm myself until I can burn this book? Or what to do?


Do you mind telling us the actual title and author of the book? So people on here can do their own research on it and/or steer clear?

Second, you can definitely burn your copy. It has been bought and paid for, you own it and you can dispose of it however you see fit. If you're having an open fire for Halloween, enjoy! Although I would suggest that a better alternative, to purge your feelings, would be ripping it up into chunks, so it becomes unusable, and putting it out with the recycling, so something good might still come from the raw materials.

Whatever you decide, follow up with your favourite drink and a pat on the back for a job well done. Good riddance to bad rubbish!
'You created us restless, O Lord, and we find no rest until we rest in You.'
~St Augustine~
Whole blog o' nonsense: Are We There Yet?

Sorcha

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #5 on: January 18, 2017, 08:51:12 pm »
Quote from: Eevee;198081
Being 1st generation Australian with a Slovakian background, I was raised Slovak, first spoke Slovak, only ate Slovak food, only sang Slovak nursery rhymes, went to a Slovak church, didn't mingle with Australian kids until school.
I can safely say, East European culture is VERY oppressed.

I can see that in my father's behavior and every other Slovakian man I know. Women will always be beneath them, and women never see it as sexism or oppression either, and most automatically assume role as housewife or trophy wife.
There might be more feminist movements there now, but they're still very much backwards.

This conservatism runs rampant in East Europe and sadly has embedded itself in the culture, to a point where a book on paganism cannot be written without sexist and racist undertones.

However, in their defense, the way men and women treated each other back in the early days was SO different, so it might come as a shock to learn that during Easter for example, out of custom,  men poured buckets of cold water on women, then whipped them (lightly) and still received sweets from them. (practiced until recently enough for my parents to recount stories)

To many of the middle aged - senior generations, there is no such thing as sexism, no such thing as racism.

The oppression of Communism until 1989(I think) probably didn't help their mentality either. East Europe had all their extreme censoring crashing down in a day - giving birth to a new sex crazed, loud mouthed, intolerant society.

It's a different society with different standards, different concepts of right and wrong. Maybe keeping that in mind may help you calm down a bit.

 
I realize this is kind of an old thread, but this hit a nerve. I dated a Slavic man for several years, and he nearly went to pieces when he realized he'd let me make a major decision in our relationship. It was the weirdest, most insecure thing I've seen a guy do. He was also EXTREMELY traditional and conservative; he felt that gender roles should be maintained and men should essentially not be bothered with any of the heavy lifting in raising children.

He was also somewhat shocked to find out that there were women in the world who weren't repulsed by the physical side of relationships. He told me that he was surprised that I was "just like a person"; he'd imagined women were totally different from men (he was an only child and his mom spoiled the crap out of him to make up for his deadbeat dad).

When he freaked out over gay marriage and gay people in general, I was done. Best decision I ever made. But yes, overall, anything that threatened (in his mind) his position as a man was extremely not okay.


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CaptainJaneway

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Re: Advice on coping with hatred
« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2017, 04:53:32 pm »
Quote from: Geckomamasita;193898
I accidentally bought this book that is literally making me feel sick and I feel completely drained by it. It's this book on "Slavic faith" but its really just racist propaganda and oppression of women. I skimmed a few pages but it brought me to tears.


I think it's hard to see this kind of hatred in written print, that has been published, because it almost legitimises the beliefs and statements it contains - and in some respects, it does, because some people will believe it - but I really hope you can take away from this that no forward-thinking person will believe what was written in that book, about women, or about different ethnic groups.

The general consensus in the world today seems to be moving in the right direction.  I'm (by no means, at all, at all) saying it's perfect - and there has been a far right-wing knee jerk to it all, in America, and in Europe - but we do seem to be moving in the right direction, slowly.

I'd suggest, if you find yourself ruminating on what was written, and its possible implications on people's viewpoints, read the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.  It's not always followed, and we're a long way off it, yet - but that's what we're aiming for.  That's, roughly, the direction we're going in (I believe).

Hope this helps.
"The cosmos is also within us - we are made of star stuff.  We are a way for the universe to know itself."  -  Carl Sagan

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