The Cauldron: A Pagan Forum

Okay, I've been Christian my entire life. Since I was born, up until I was nineteen. So I've had a long history of being Christian. I think subconsciously I've always hated the Christian religion, I mean far be it from me you can believe what ever you want to believe. But, as a personal preference I didn't see the point in believing in the God of Abraham. Last Sunday, April 10, 2016 I renounced my faith with my right hand on a bible. Rejecting the teachings of Jesus Christ and my baptism and savior.

And to be honest what got me turned on to Asatru is the show Vikings. A bit corny and cliché, but the writer of that show gave an interesting look into Norse Gods and their mythology. I was infatuated with it. The show gave an interesting point on Christian women and the bible. In Christianity the women had to bow down to men and they shall do what the please with these women. But the Norse women were fierce and loyal with their blades and shields. And I have to believe this is true because it really says in the bible that women have to do what ever a man says. I disagree with that. My mother is a warrior and she put up with a lot of shit with my father, who was Christian, and thought it was okay to do what he pleased with her.

Back to the point before I stray off to quickly. When I renounced my faith to the God of Abraham, everything was silent. It was cold, and shallow. I think this was because I had left something I truly believed in for so long. But, I fought through it and prevailed. Swearing my faith and allegiance to Odin and the Norse Gods. I gave my sword that my father gave me to Odin as a gift. And delivered my first prayer to him. I had work the next day so I fell asleep.

As I awoke for my first day at work. I pledged my whole days work to Odin. I told Him that I would work harder than I've ever worked as tribute. I don't have a car so I had to take my bike. And Thor, as they say in the show Vikings, clashed his hammer on his anvil. Thunder struck and lightning hit the ground. The water from the rain splashed my face, and the wind blew my hood straight off my head. With the rain thick and my pathway obstructed, I could not see. But, I fought. And I pedaled as hard as I could. I reached my new job on time and began to start the day.

I worked as hard as I said I would. Sweat dripping from my face, my ankles starting to swell, and my muscles started to stiffen and cramp. But as before I fought through it. Dedicating my entire day hoping to show the Gods, what I could offer. When break time came, I walked outside the building to smoke on a cigarette. The rain, thunder, and lighting still colliding with the ground. This worried me.

When break time was over, I went back inside to work. After five more hours of exhausting work the day was finally over. I did not pay attention to what was happening outside so I had no idea if the rain had stopped. But when I left the building to ride my bike back home the weather was sunny, and warm. The long road ahead was so surprising to me. The grass was greener than I had ever saw it. The dead hay that stood in the fields was no longer brown. But golden and beautiful. The sunshine that glared over me put the biggest smile on my face. I assume people in their vehicles thought I was stoned because my smile was huge on my face. But I wasn't high off of narcotics. But I was high on my new found Gods.

So my questions are,
Am I in the right path with Asatru?
Do you think my experience was something the Gods were trying to show me?
Can you brother and sisters point me in the direction of some good Norse books?
What should I do with the sword that I pledged to Odin?

Thank you. I hope you read my full experience, and sorry if this isn't the right place. I'm a beginner but I wanted to give a back story following up to my questions. So you understand a little more about who I am.

to be honest what got me turned on to Asatru is the show Vikings. A bit corny and cliché, but the writer of that show gave an interesting look into Norse Gods and their mythology. I was infatuated with it. The show gave an interesting point on Christian women

I really want to marathon that show, but I only caught one episode where I think the main character was talking about how he wanted to leave town to look for new gods: because the ones in his town were corrupting the corrupt mayor dude beheader person thing, or something. I've heard that some pockets of modern Heathenry have a remarkable racism problem, and perhaps a flabbergasting amount of sexism too. It remains a great influence on how I understand my brand of faelatry, but it's humbling to observe the corruptibility of any given path.

Am I in the right path with Asatru?

Evidently so, from what I've read of the topic you've started, because you're starting. On this I'd advise against letting anyone, myself included, definitively tell you yes or no. :p (Unless there's like an initiatory niche or clique or thing? I haven't heard of any.)

Do you think my experience was something the Gods were trying to show me?

It's cool to find what new agers call synchronicity (meaningful coincidences), it's great to live enveloped in the presence of the divine, and I personally can't quite quit my belief in intervention and interference. That said, I can only depend on signs or blame Thor so much for being obtuse so much before I realize that it rains because it rains, and rain means rain.

Can you brother and sisters point me in the direction of some good Norse books?

When I started asking around, a helpful forum member referred me to the sagas. I can't find the link anymore, but I think this was the main database and surely there must be some paperback compilations.

Snorri's Eddas consolidated what would become the most popular understanding of what the way of it is, so, my understanding of this text now is that the mainstream is flat wrong because of Snorri, so it's recommended reading because of how willfully oblivious this text was to the thing it was supposed to be describing? I still include aspects of it, though, in a practice I just really had to resort to calling something else.

I hope this helps! Sorry I can't think of any suggestions about the sword.

• If you feel Ásatrú (which is actually the Icelandic form of Heathenry) is right for you, then it is. There shouldn't be a need to question it if it is right.
• If you got a feeling it was the Gods communicating with you, then it probably was. Keep in mind sometimes a thunderstorm is just a thunderstorm, and a raven is just a raven. The Gods will let you know. Sometimes it's overt, sometimes it's subtle.
  
  
  
• As mentioned, Kevin Crossley-Holland's book The Norse Myths is excellent, as is Padraic Colum's Children of Odin. I give one caution with Culture of the Teutons... it is very dense and dry, more of a history book than a guide for living as a Heathen today. You have to be very discerning as to what can be applied today.  For example, you can't go lopping off a woman's head because she committed adultery, as the Norse were legally permitted (and obligated) to do.
  
  
  
• Destroy the sword in some way, it must be removed from the human realm or the possibility of use by humans. Bury it, break it, bend it, toss it into a lake, river or the ocean. You cannot keep it.

Lastly, as Megatherium pointed out, Odin is extremely exacting, demanding and hell-bent on fulfilling his agenda. Be careful what you promise or ask of him. He will expect a return, one you may not be prepared to give. As someone elsewhere once pointed out, if you complain to him or ask him to help with some physical ailment, for example, be prepared for a response of "try impaling yourself on a spear, stick it in a tree and hang there for 9 days and nights with no food or drink, gouge out your eye, then come to me about your backache". :p He is not always the grandfatherly Gandalf-type. My dealing with him is pretty much limited to prayers of thanks and acknowledgements. I do intend to start making offerings of liquor to him, but I will not ask for anything, I'll simply offer it to him as an honored guest, and his position as All-Father.

Thank you everyone. This has been a great insight to what is to come. I'm now in the process of buying and researching those books. And I guess because I'm new to this thank you for the warning on the All-Father. It's a Christian habit to bow down in any instance and ask for forgiveness or something else to the God of Abraham.