The Cauldron: A Pagan Forum

All good suggestions.  In particular I'd say Freyja.  One thing to keep in mind with her is that though she is effective and can be gentle she can also be a bit intense.  

In my UPG(take with a head sized chunk of salt), she seems to favor self-esteem repairs through self improvement(do all the things) and recognition(have situations where you are forced to see the results of self improvement).

For sure. That's the Heathen way... stand on our own two feet.

A little bit of background information: I'm a guy in my mid-20s. I'm very very very shy and my confidence and self-esteem is shot to pieces and it's something I have struggled with my entire life. I have decided this is something I really need to work on. My father made me feel worthless from the time I was very young and I was teased a lot in high school and as a result I retreated inward. Due to my shyness, poor self esteem and confidence, I've never had a romantic relationship or been intimate with anybody whatsoever and I would like to experience that. Why has romance never happened for me?: 1) I am too shy and insecure to approach 2) I was convinced no one would want a fat, ugly loser like me; and 3) I was scared of being vulnerable. Not only that, I find the fact I haven't even been kissed at my age really embarrassing for me.

My question is, are there gods that are good with/or can help with developing a persons confidence and self esteem? Ones that I could easily reach out to? I have interests in the Germanic pantheon and I have also worked with the Virgin Mary in the past but I'm willing to look into any pantheon.

Can anybody offer any advice?

 
I'm going to take a bit of a different approach with this question to everyone else. The problem with pursuing self-esteem, confidence, and by extension happiness, is that it is hard to know what will actually achieve that. Not only that, but they are very hard to define. What is happiness anyway? This makes it a very hard thing to seek out and find. Not only that but pursuit of them can lead to actual problems being ignored. Ultimately, I believe that confidence, self-esteem, and happiness are not goals themselves, but the product of a good way of life, depending on whatever that specifically means to you. I don't really know how to help you, but it might be worth re-examining your own life and learning how to balance the different parts of it, and finding out which are actually important to you.

Where do the gods fit it? Well remember that a relationship with the gods is (at least for my religion) about establishing and maintaining series of relationships to maintain harmony on Earth. Surely there is some god out there who is willing to help you. Finding them is the hard part. It might be good to look to a nature god. Nature is  good place for getting to know yourself without having to deal with social pressures.

My two cents... Freyr and Freyja are great with self-love and esteem issues. My experience has been that They are both very approachable and kind.

 
^this x2. In addition to freyr and freyja I have found Thor to help alot too. When I work with Thor for a while I catch myself carrying myself different. I find myself feeling like I can take on anything but I don't need to show everyone if that makes sense.

A little bit of background information: I'm a guy in my mid-20s. I'm very very very shy and my confidence and self-esteem is shot to pieces and it's something I have struggled with my entire life. I have decided this is something I really need to work on. My father made me feel worthless from the time I was very young and I was teased a lot in high school and as a result I retreated inward. Due to my shyness, poor self esteem and confidence, I've never had a romantic relationship or been intimate with anybody whatsoever and I would like to experience that. Why has romance never happened for me?: 1) I am too shy and insecure to approach 2) I was convinced no one would want a fat, ugly loser like me; and 3) I was scared of being vulnerable. Not only that, I find the fact I haven't even been kissed at my age really embarrassing for me.

My question is, are there gods that are good with/or can help with developing a persons confidence and self esteem? Ones that I could easily reach out to? I have interests in the Germanic pantheon and I have also worked with the Virgin Mary in the past but I'm willing to look into any pantheon.

Can anybody offer any advice?

 
Hermes.  In my experience he's always willing to lend an ear, and he can help you be more confident and outspoken as well.  He has an interesting sense of humor too.

A little bit of background information: I'm a guy in my mid-20s. I'm very very very shy and my confidence and self-esteem is shot to pieces and it's something I have struggled with my entire life. I have decided this is something I really need to work on.

It sounds like visualizing meditation of the pathworking type (although not necessarily within a kabbalistic paradigm) on the Sun could be helpful. At least it was for me, almost fifteen years ago.

• Avoid coffee, tea and carbs for some hours
• Sit or lie down comfortably
• Relax and let tensions in your muscles go away
• Visualize yourself in a real or imaginary place were you feel comfortable
• See yourself find a gateway of some sort, perhaps a cave or tunnel
• The tunnel goes downwards. Count from ten to one backwards.
• You find yourself in a deeper level of your consousness
• At last the tunnel ends with a door of stone, with a keyhole. It is your door, not someone elses.
  
• The key is in your own heart
• See how the key beams out of your heart and land in your hand
• You open the door of stone
• You find yourself in a place with eight doors: Seven of them different from the one from which you entered the room
• Each of the seven doors have a symbol which is meaningful for you, and symbolise the seven planets known in the ancient time
• Find the door to the Realm of the Sun
• Open it and explore what is inside

---

• Return from the Realm of the Sun
• When you close the door to the Realm of the Sun, you notice the symbol on the door: A symbol meaningful for you, which denotes the Sun
• You stand in a place with eight doors
• Seven of the doors have a symbol which is meaningful for you, and symbolise the seven planets known in the ancient time
• You recognise the eighth door as the one from which you once entered the Place of the Planetary Doors
• You step outside the eighth door and lock it with your key
• Your key returns from your hand into your heart
• You walk the steep tunnel upwards, returning more and more to your everyday-consciousness
• At last you see daylight. You are in the real or imaginary place were you feel comfortable, from which you once entered the tunnel
• Rest there as long as you need
• Then prepare for return to full everyday-consciousness
• Count from one to ten
• Take a handful of deep breaths
• Stretch your arms, legs and other muscles
• Write in a diary or notebook about what you have experienced
• If you have an impulse to paint or create some other piece of art, do it
• Drink something warm and have some sugar, to ensure that you have returned to everyday-consciousness
• Do something practical as a consequence of what you learned from your exercise the days following the exercise.
  

For a more allround exploration and development of personality, not limited to the issue of confidence, explore systematically all of the seven ancient planets over a period of time. There are several traditional sequences in which they can be explored, in order to keep a reasonably balanced life, although there is a risk that an exploration like this will cause seven small identity crises.

The widespread magical sequence
This one was developed by the ceremonial magician W.W. Westcott after reading the Lutheran mystic Jacob Boehme and (probably) occultist freemason Kenneth MacKenzie:
1. Moon
2. Saturn
3. Mercury
4. Jupiter
5. Venus
6. Mars
7. Sun

Step 1. and 2. are meant to be explored at the same period of time.
So are step 3. and 4.
and 5. and 6.

One of the alchemical sequences
This one is known from alchemical allegorical emblems from the 17th and 18th centuries:

1. Saturn
2. Jupiter
3. Mars
4. Venus
5. Moon
6. Sun
7. Mercury

The Ptolemaean sequence

1. Moon
2. Mercury
3. Venus
4. Sun
5. Mars
6. Jupiter
7. Saturn

The last step in this sequence stimulates wisdom, but also causes a lot of strain.

. you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.
For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.
. . . Someone came from the ruler of the synagogue’s house, saying to him, “Your daughter is dead.”

 
...Are you lost?