The Cauldron: A Pagan Forum

I decided to do a bit of reminiscing and looked back over some very old posts in the archived board. Wow, it is so odd to look back at what I had written and how things have changed.

At the time, I had experienced a fair amount of problems and was hoping to resolve those issues. They were in fact resolved, but looking back, new and equally difficult ones replaced them. In some ways, for a brief time when I was posting on the old board, things were actually better and seemed to be moving in a good direction.

Shortly after some of my last posts, serious family health issues arose that pretty much consumed me from fall, 2013 until last spring. Fortunately all ended well with respect to that.

Concurrently, the saddest situation has been the loss of my dearest twinflame/soulmate in August. We had been together for a very long time and unless you have had the amazing experience of having a twinflame/soulmate, it may be hard to conceptualize the depth of the attachment and profundity of the loss. It still seems unreal and there are times that I still believe that he will come back into my life.

Over the years, I have gone back and forth with my use of magick sometimes giving up and then sometimes trying to get back into it. Right now, I am not sure where I am with all of that. I guess I really need something to restore  my self confidence that I am able to be effective but even more so, I need some kind of direction and without my twinflame/soulmate, my future is kind of uncertain.

So, over the years, there have been so many changes and I am just not sure where all of it is headed.